What stresses you out the most during the holidays?

[superme80]

Trying to make everyone happy. I live 2 hours from my family and only 30 mins from my in laws. My MIL is pretty chill about things. Normally Christmas is at home, and we are traveling the weekend before. Not sure what is happening with my side of the family since my grandpa has to move to a board and care home with more care due to his failing health. Christmas eve might be at my SIL's an hour away. I hate being on the road so much, but I do love both sides of my family, so they are worth it. Unfortunately DS #1 is having major dental work the week before Christmas, so that is an added stress.

 

[OhMari]

Two things:

1) Wrapping Gifts!!! Every year I try to wrap gifts, more or less have a panic attack about it, give up and go and buy gift bags. Did it tonight after work, tried to wrap a few things. Tomorrow I will hit Target/Hobby Lobby/Walmart for gift bags.

2) Honestly I think putting anything up. Maybe because this year is the first Christmas since my mom died, but I have no desire to put anything up. Inside or outside. Got the tree up Thanksgiving weekend, but that was it. Nothing else, not even outside lights. I think it was because my mom enjoyed it so much is why I did so much, even when she only came over to my house four or five times from right after Thanksgiving to after the start of the new year. Have been getting flack from family/friends/neighbors about nothing being up.

If you do not want to put up decorations, don’t. Do not let people bully you. We went away last year for 2 weeks over Christmas and I did not even put a tree up. My family was upset with me, but it felt so good to come home to a clean house and not have to do all the work taking Christmas decorations down. Sorry about your mom.

 

[Cubbiecakes]

The whole kit and kaboodle.

I used to like the lights, but that’s been ruined by every other holiday that now has lights...

 

[bapcap]

Family, namely my mother. She expects Christmas to be perfect, with all the family (at least 10) together.
I think she always has visions of “It’s a Wonderful Life” every year and every year there always seems to be tension.
Since the get together is usually at our home, I tend to be the referee/peacekeeper for the day. Oh joy!!

 

[tarheelmjfan]

This thread reminded of a post I saw on FB, which pretty much says it all.

Sorry, it's so large. I tried to resize it, but obviously failed.

I would give anything to spend another Christmas with my parents.

 

[Kitty 34]

Family, namely my mother. She expects Christmas to be perfect, with all the family (at least 10) together.
I think she always has visions of “It’s a Wonderful Life” every year and every year there always seems to be tension.
Since the get together is usually at our home, I tend to be the referee/peacekeeper for the day. Oh joy!!

As a mother/MIL, my expectations and visions of Christmas have usually been more in tune with "Christmas Vacation"!

 

[luvsJack]

This thread reminded of a post I saw on FB, which pretty much says it all.

Sorry, it's so large. I tried to resize it, but obviously failed.

I would give anything to spend another Christmas with my parents.

This is so very true!

I understand the frustration of trying to fit everyone in on the holidays, not getting why a parent isn’t willing to make the celebration just “one day” in December to make it easier on the kids or whatever.

But sometimes adult kids need to remember that their parents are people too. They want to see their kids and they want to spend time with family on Christmas Day. Usually they aren’t trying to be difficult, they just want their family!

And when they are gone, most will wish for just one more of those busy, way to much to do and too many places to go, Christmases.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

In the past so much would stress me out about it. From the cleaning, decorating, to the cooking, to buying presents, to people visiting.

This year I decided I'm done with the stress. I decorated as much as I wanted and am happy with it.

I told my husband if he didn't help me put up the 9 foot tree he wanted and that is in the attic, I was putting a 4 foot one on top of my portable bar and calling it done.
Last night he actually got the tall tree out, helped fluff it and held garland and ribbon for me to put on it and then helped decorate. For the first time in 35 years!

Now the only thing left is shopping for gifts and we don't have much money this year so that should go fast.

And the cooking? My college kids will be helping with that this year if they want to eat. Both know how to cook and it's time they experienced the fun that is cooking a Christmas dinner. LOL

I just found out last night no one is planning on visiting us this year so that removed the last thing that would stress me out. I sure got lucky this year!

Good Luck to everyone!

 

[starrzone]

Having my husband's family come visit...I find them very stressful to deal with. My anxiety level goes up 1000x!

 

[Snowflakey]

Oh I just love Christmas. Not much stresses me out. I keep thinking of how blessed I am to be able to celebrate with everyone as each new year we don't know who we may lose. I love to cook, bake and make everyone feel happy and special. Sure it's hectic and busy. I don't care. There is something about this time of year that just makes me feel peaceful.

I sound like a Hallmark movie

 

[foodiddiedoo]

My daughter's birthday is December 24th. She's going to be 4 this year. Both sets of grandparents live in our state and are within an hour's drive from our house (MIL is only 30 minutes away). Christmas Holidays used to be easy, my husband and I would alternate whose family we would spend Christmas with vs Thanksgiving. I'm an only child so when I don't spend a holiday with my parents they are alone and I always feel sad that I can't be with them. Now that we have a child both sets of grandparents want to be there for her birthday, which means planning something for the family on the 24th. Then my husband's family will usually invite themselves over for Christmas during whatever we're doing for my daughter's birthday. One year, my husband's siblings confirmed they were coming to our house for Thanksgiving only to blow us off and expect my MIL back at her place to cook them their own Thanksgiving dinner! I really don't enjoy spending time with my in-laws (any of them except my FIL), and the fact of the matter that they are so unreliable stresses me out crazily! They originally told me they were going to Dallas for Christmas and we wouldn't have to worry about entertaining them at all, but then switched and went for Thanksgiving and still won't confirm their plans with us. On top off the stressors of never knowing what they are doing, it's really hard to have to get ready for Christmas at your house, as well as make a small child feel special for their birthday that is essentially on a holiday which will always overshadow it. Also it's hard to come up with distinct birthday and Christmas gifts without having any time between to find new things she might actually want.

 

[amberpi]

As a mother/MIL, my expectations and visions of Christmas have usually been more in tune with "Christmas Vacation"!

This probably makes you a super rad mil, just sayin’.

 

[tsme]

What stresses me out the most is dealing with extended family.

 

[Hikergirl]

Now that my kids are older and I'm not stressing over what Santa is bringing, and we travel to see family throughout the holiday break instead of Christmas Day, the only thing that really stresses me out is the local traffic. It is already bad enough here but now I've got to deal with more people out on the road, and a good number of them shouldn't be allowed behind the wheel.

 

[luvsJack]

My daughter's birthday is December 24th. She's going to be 4 this year. Both sets of grandparents live in our state and are within an hour's drive from our house (MIL is only 30 minutes away). Christmas Holidays used to be easy, my husband and I would alternate whose family we would spend Christmas with vs Thanksgiving. I'm an only child so when I don't spend a holiday with my parents they are alone and I always feel sad that I can't be with them. Now that we have a child both sets of grandparents want to be there for her birthday, which means planning something for the family on the 24th. Then my husband's family will usually invite themselves over for Christmas during whatever we're doing for my daughter's birthday. One year, my husband's siblings confirmed they were coming to our house for Thanksgiving only to blow us off and expect my MIL back at her place to cook them their own Thanksgiving dinner! I really don't enjoy spending time with my in-laws (any of them except my FIL), and the fact of the matter that they are so unreliable stresses me out crazily! They originally told me they were going to Dallas for Christmas and we wouldn't have to worry about entertaining them at all, but then switched and went for Thanksgiving and still won't confirm their plans with us. On top off the stressors of never knowing what they are doing, it's really hard to have to get ready for Christmas at your house, as well as make a small child feel special for their birthday that is essentially on a holiday which will always overshadow it. Also it's hard to come up with distinct birthday and Christmas gifts without having any time between to find new things she might actually want.

Oh bless you! That is stressful!

I have a friend whose daughter’s birthday is the 23rd. Not sure what they did when the child was younger but when she was older, they picked a day between Thanksgiving and Christmas to have a party. All birthday, all day. Christmas decorations didn’t go up until after the party. Not sure if that would work for you with the grandparents but it worked well for them. I think she still did something on the child’s birthday, like open one Christmas gift and a cake.

 

[Grumpy's Gal]

This year it’s money. We haven’t been in a position of having to watch our pennies so closely for a long, long time and I’m out of practise.

Been there, done that. Sending you good wishes.

Before I forget, I want to thank you for the fudge recipe you shared last Christmas. My DH’s extended family freaked! ( you know how to make FUDGE? How do you make fudge? Did you see— she BROUGHT FUDGE! It’s HOMEMADE? OMG I Haven’t ever known anyone who could make fudge. Well, since great grandma so and so.) you would’ve thought I brought bars of gold! So when they asked me how to make it, I kinda fibbed...( I FLATOUT LIED)
“oh, a dear friend from Canada... it’s her family’s secret recipe. She gave it to me but I promised I’d never give it out.”
So again this year, I will make your family’s “secret recipe” and add walnuts to the top. My DH’s Family will gush over it and I will be thinking of you!

 

[Grumpy's Gal]

Two things:

1) Wrapping Gifts!!! Every year I try to wrap gifts, more or less have a panic attack about it, give up and go and buy gift bags. Did it tonight after work, tried to wrap a few things. Tomorrow I will hit Target/Hobby Lobby/Walmart for gift bags.

Can I tell you what I did? Many years ago, we had opened all the gifts and the pile of trash was ENORMOUS. This was with extended family. I announced we wanted to make a change but I wanted everyone to be on board. I don’t remember the numbers now but we looked it up and quoted how many millions of pounds/tons of gift wrap ended up in the dump around Christmas. We decided to no longer use gift wrap. The day after Christmas, I went to the fabric store and bought Christmas fabric. On sale. Many kinds. I made all sizes of draw string bags. I went to Michaels and HObby Lobby and bought some heavy duty reusable holiday boxes. That’s what we use instead of wrap with my family. We re-use every year. We keep the bags in one of the boxes. We add new bags as needed or as I see cute fabric.

I do have a few friends I use gift wrap for. But with family, we use bags.

 

[ronandannette]

Been there, done that. Sending you good wishes.

Before I forget, I want to thank you for the fudge recipe you shared last Christmas. My DH’s extended family freaked! ( you know how to make FUDGE? How do you make fudge? Did you see— she BROUGHT FUDGE! It’s HOMEMADE? OMG I Haven’t ever known anyone who could make fudge. Well, since great grandma so and so.) you would’ve thought I brought bars of gold! So when they asked me how to make it, I kinda fibbed...( I FLATOUT LIED)
“oh, a dear friend from Canada... it’s her family’s secret recipe. She gave it to me but I promised I’d never give it out.”
So again this year, I will make your family’s “secret recipe” and add walnuts to the top. My DH’s Family will gush over it and I will be thinking of you!

Oh Lord...I am laughing so hard!! Hon, we all lie about that fudge - seriously, who would enjoy it as much if they knew it only took 3 minutes? If they press you any further just have them read this article and tell them making fudge is waaaay to hard for regular people. http://bigbaketheory.com/2011/12/22/the-science-of-fudge/

 

[TipsyTraveler]

Can I tell you what I did? Many years ago, we had opened all the gifts and the pile of trash was ENORMOUS. This was with extended family. I announced we wanted to make a change but I wanted everyone to be on board. I don’t remember the numbers now but we looked it up and quoted how many millions of pounds/tons of gift wrap ended up in the dump around Christmas. We decided to no longer use gift wrap. The day after Christmas, I went to the fabric store and bought Christmas fabric. On sale. Many kinds. I made all sizes of draw string bags. I went to Michaels and HObby Lobby and bought some heavy duty reusable holiday boxes. That’s what we use instead of wrap with my family. We re-use every year. We keep the bags in one of the boxes. We add new bags as needed or as I see cute fabric.

I do have a few friends I use gift wrap for. But with family, we use bags.

I’m in the process of switching over to reusable supplies myself. I’ve started building a stash of Christmas fabrics for wrapping gifts with the furoshiki method. (I purchased relatively inexpensive cloth napkins, bandanas, and square tablecloths instead of the pricier furoshiki cloths.) It’s so much simpler than traditional paper wrapping! No gathering supplies, no measuring, no cutting, no tape, no accidentally tearing the paper, no clean up... and it only takes a fraction of the time. It’s seriously so quick and easy. I feel like I just discovered some great life hack and found myself getting annoyed by the gifts I did have to wrap in paper. (For those I used kraft paper as it’s recyclable at least, unlike regular wrapping paper.) I used jute (compostable) in place of ribbon and embellished the gifts with reusable items like bells and ornaments. I’m really happy with the results and will be even happier once I have enough fabrics that I never have to bother with paper again.

You should consider making a side business with those drawstring bags. I looked at those originally and only came across one seller on Amazon and they were a bit too rich for my blood. I can’t remember if I looked at Etsy, but I bet there would be a market for them there.

 

[LovesTimone]

My DH wants to buy too many gifts for the grandkids and my kids tell him not too many. I feel like I am caught in the middle. Plus we have to wrap the gifts. I do not like to wrap gifts!

Gift bags... will take care of this...