What stresses you out the most during the holidays?

[Boardwalk Jedi]

Just trying to get everything done. No matter how early I begin shopping or how organized I am, I always seem to be doing some last minute shopping on Christmas Eve for someone. We still do a big Christmas for the kids. We aren't huge spenders throughout the year (unless you count those two in college ) and our vacations are at my parents who live near the beach. Even those aren't the same given everyone's schedules. Christmas Morning is one time the six of us are consistently together...and those days are numbered. Anyway, I end up having a lot of wrapping to do. Then we have the extended family dinner at our house that I cook a lot for. It's a great time, but then I head out to work at the hospital to get my holiday shift in. I hate that part.

I guess I've been fortunate that family drama hasn't been that abundant these last few years. A few arguments and eventually learning to not care what everyone else thinks will do that.

 

[luvsJack]

Most stressful thing for me is family and the sadness that comes with not being with them (because they don't want to be with me, since my religious choices aren't good enough for them I guess.) What makes it even harder is having well intentioned people constantly asking about what my Christmas plans are and trying to be vague when I explain it because there are some people who think that you have to be with your family for the holidays no matter what. And also just having to constantly be reminded that I'm not celebating the holidays the way most other people are. The whole "you'll miss them when they're gone" philosophy can be pretty hurtful at times. They're still here and I already miss them, but that doesn't mean I can spend the holidays with them.

Your post brought tears to my eyes! I am so sorry!

I can’t imagine not wanting to be with a part of my family because of their religious beliefs or lack of or whatever the issue is. I am just so sorry your family has made this choice.

I hope you have many supportive friends to spend your holidays with.

 

[MamaLema]

Buying the perfect present for people who have everything

All the work it takes to put together Christmas dinner and desserts from scratch while everyone else sits around and watches TV

Popping in the store for 5 min to get a gift but spending 10 min to scrape the ice off your windshield

The electric bill for DH’s elaborate Christmas outdoor decorations

Knowing I will gain a few pounds from all those goodies

 

[luvsJack]

Speaking of kids, one of mine has brought a stressor this year. Apparently his gf has not been keeping up with the bills and hasn’t been telling him and it’s all caving in. Between them they have three children and no way of knowing it they will have any money to spend on gifts. Add to it all her dog was injured pretty badly and they had vet bills to pay. I suggested working out a payment plan but she doesn’t take suggestions well, so I mentioned it and let it go. So now she can’t pay the car note that she hasn’t paid in two months.

I asked him today how on earth did he not know this was happening. And reminded him that he is supposed to do a little more than give her the money, he should be actively keeping up with it all along with her. They have separate accounts and he gives her money from each check to pay the bills from her account. Really? You couldn’t sit down with her and y’all pay the bills together??

Dh is sitting at a truck stop right now in NC with the snow. Truck not rolling means less money for us. So I will help them but me buying a big Christmas for three kids isn’t in our budget either since I wasn’t prepared ahead of time. If I had known a month ago, I could have been much better prepared. I am so frustrated with them!!

Thinking of getting a trampoline for them together and then some games and books and perhaps tickets to the zoo in NOLA. Like I told dh, if they can’t take them, he and I can so I don’t have to worry about them not getting used.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

The electric bill for DH’s elaborate Christmas outdoor decorations

Ours isn't elaborate but one of the reasons I wanted us to have a timer was because of helping the costs down a bit. The other part was because we didn't have to be at home to turn them on. Give or take our outdoor lights are on just before 5pm until just after 11pm but there are enough people in the neighborhood that leave them on for a lot longer than us.

 

[kimblebee]

Oh yeah, been there done that. 3 years ago I had a full on crying breakdown. They felt badly at the time, but last year when they came back, more of the same.

Honestly, I don't mind my MIL. She is very unobtrusive and agreeable. She kind of blends right in and spends a good amount of time reading or hanging with the kids. She eats whatever I am making without fuss or questioning and she prepares her own breakfasts and lunches. She's fine. But I don't feel like I can ban my parents and continue to allow MIL to visit. That would open up a HUGE can of drama.

Could you tell your family that you will provide dinner but they are on their own for breakfast and lunch? They obviously know how to feed themselves when they are at home. Remind them that it’s a holiday for you too.

 

[ronandannette]

Could you tell your family that you will provide dinner but they are on their own for breakfast and lunch? They obviously know how to feed themselves when they are at home. Remind them that it’s a holiday for you too.

For me, if I had one of, or both my mother and mother-in-law in the house I’d never even get near the kitchen (or the laundry room or vacuum cleaner). They were the types that came fully intending to pitch in, not be waited on. I miss those days.

All of our family members are the same way (well, the women anyway). We’re spending a few days over Christmas at my sister’s and I’m snickering at the idea of walking in and planting myself on the couch while she rushes around.

 

[GreatLakes]

It seems that remembering that "no" is a complete sentence would alleviate a lot of the stress in this thread. If you don't want to do something just say no. You don't need to explain your reasoning, not even to family, just say no.

 

[jaybirdsmommy]

The dog ate our outside christmas lights. We finally got around to putting them up, noticed they didn't work the next night. Went out to see why and found all the cords chewed through. )#$%*)$*)($#*$()%{*${)($%)()#$)(!_@$$_# It's a wonder she didn't electrocute herself. Now I have to figure out it I can replace the cords or trash $75 worth of lights.

 

[wgeo]

On a much lighter note - I put out Christmas lights this year and the annoying bunnies keep chewing through the wires. It stresses me out every night to see if they're gonna come on or not.

 

[DLgal]

It seems that remembering that "no" is a complete sentence would alleviate a lot of the stress in this thread. If you don't want to do something just say no. You don't need to explain your reasoning, not even to family, just say no.

LOL. You don't know my mother. No is never taken at face value. You HAVE to give her an explanation for everything. All the time. It's exhausting.

 

[DLgal]

Could you tell your family that you will provide dinner but they are on their own for breakfast and lunch? They obviously know how to feed themselves when they are at home. Remind them that it’s a holiday for you too.

I basically try to do that. However, it's the dinner part that is so exhausting for me. I maybe cook a full dinner 3 times a week. The rest are days we just do something quick. I have to make 3 different dinners every night as it is, due to my kids autism and selective eating. So, I try to minimize how often I have to cook, even though I love cooking. Honestly, if I could make ONE dinner every night that my entire family would eat, my life would be so much easier. A LOT of times, I just have a bowl of cereal for dinner and call it a night. My parents would be horrified if I told them dinner was cold cereal. LOL. My dad is basically helpless as far as food prep goes...My mom has been cooking for him for over 40 years. When she comes here, she pulls out the "I'm on vacation" card. So, everything falls on me. She will maybe cook once while she is here. MIL is a TERRIBLE cook, so I just suck it up when she is here and cook more often, although I try to make enough so we have leftovers. She is cool with frozen pizza or sandwiches for dinner, plus she eats like a bird so it's easy to satisfy her.

 

[kimblebee]

I basically try to do that. However, it's the dinner part that is so exhausting for me. I maybe cook a full dinner 3 times a week. The rest are days we just do something quick. I have to make 3 different dinners every night as it is, due to my kids autism and selective eating. So, I try to minimize how often I have to cook, even though I love cooking. Honestly, if I could make ONE dinner every night that my entire family would eat, my life would be so much easier. A LOT of times, I just have a bowl of cereal for dinner and call it a night. My parents would be horrified if I told them dinner was cold cereal. LOL. My dad is basically helpless as far as food prep goes...My mom has been cooking for him for over 40 years. When she comes here, she pulls out the "I'm on vacation" card. So, everything falls on me. She will maybe cook once while she is here. MIL is a TERRIBLE cook, so I just suck it up when she is here and cook more often, although I try to make enough so we have leftovers. She is cool with frozen pizza or sandwiches for dinner, plus she eats like a bird so it's easy to satisfy her.

That does make things a bit harder. I’m with you, there’s nothing wrong with cereal for supper but I would never try and suggest that to my mom. Good luck to you.

 

[RedAngie]

uggg. I put up my pre-lit artificial tree this past weekend and all the lights in the middle section don't work. Top and bottom are fine. DH tried fixing them but no go. I have extra strings of lights so I suppose I'll just fill in and then maybe buy a new tree on clearance after Christmas.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

uggg. I put up my pre-lit artificial tree this past weekend and all the lights in the middle section don't work. Top and bottom are fine. DH tried fixing them but no go. I have extra strings of lights so I suppose I'll just fill in and then maybe buy a new tree on clearance after Christmas.

If you have incandescent light bulbs on the tree (or in general) this is what I use:



It's a life-saver!

 

[DLgal]

uggg. I put up my pre-lit artificial tree this past weekend and all the lights in the middle section don't work. Top and bottom are fine. DH tried fixing them but no go. I have extra strings of lights so I suppose I'll just fill in and then maybe buy a new tree on clearance after Christmas.

Did you try changing the fuse on the section that is dark? It's probably just that. Each section should plug into each other section. Slide open the door on the plug and replace the fuse.

 

[RedAngie]

If you have incandescent light bulbs on the tree (or in general) this is what I use:

View attachment 369416

It's a life-saver!

Thanks. I've seen those in stores. Maybe I'll try it.

Did you try changing the fuse on the section that is dark? It's probably just that. Each section should plug into each other section. Slide open the door on the plug and replace the fuse.

Yes, DH changed the fuses, but it didn't work. All the bulbs are in place. We're thinking there might be a cut wire hidden somewhere intertwined in the branches.

 

[ronandannette]

uggg. I put up my pre-lit artificial tree this past weekend and all the lights in the middle section don't work. Top and bottom are fine. DH tried fixing them but no go. I have extra strings of lights so I suppose I'll just fill in and then maybe buy a new tree on clearance after Christmas.

When that happened to mine I just cut out the lights that came on the tree and used strings of lights from there on in.

 

[Mirielle]

What comes close to stressing me out during the holidays is reading these ridiculous posts about tipping everyone and his brother for jobs they're being paid to do. * I do believe in tipping for services provided in hair salons, restaurants and airports by baggage handlers.

 

[Kitty 34]

The dog ate our outside christmas lights. We finally got around to putting them up, noticed they didn't work the next night. Went out to see why and found all the cords chewed through. )#$%*)$*)($#*$()%{*${)($%)()#$)(!_@$$_# It's a wonder she didn't electrocute herself. Now I have to figure out it I can replace the cords or trash $75 worth of lights.

I'm sorry but your post made me laugh!

Thank goodness, tho, your dog was ok.