What would you have done?

[Schmeck]

I guess I have a different view on handling this then many of you. I would have totally corrected my child right then and there and he would have apologized to the family for his/her rudeness. I also would have not been getting off at the stop but rode right back to the hotel with my child. Sorry but that is definitely a behavior that warrants an immediate punishment.

I agree with you - if someone does it in public, it gets addressed in public. Otherwise, you are sending the message that they can get away with bad behavior, and that it is OK to hurt someone else in public. Why would the dressing-down have to be done in private?

About my initial response - for me, turn-about is fair play. I was not insinuating that autism=crazy, more that the gesture of 'cuckoo' crazy was an insult, and that it was reflected back on the originator. I'm sorry if some people misunderstood.

 

[DOREEN1779]

I think this may have been one of a handful of instances, that it was a child who made, in this instance, an inappropriate remark. In the past, it has been adults. With the adults, I get mad and go into protective mode. When a child makes a remark, I become sad. I mentioned a few bumps in the road on this trip. The other was at the airport. I board early with my family to get my DS9 situated. He gets uneasy and worked up when people loom over him or in crowded situations. We get him seated by the window, snacks, and toys ready. It sets the tone and a routine he is used to. You may think I'm crazy but I book so far in advance, I usually am able to get the same seats on our return departure. We are sitting at the gate waiting to board(we have about an hour). I go to the attendant at the front and briefly explain my situation. As usual, he tells me to approach after first class and military are called. He will inform the gate attendant. As we are waiting, there are multiple announcements requesting that people check their carry on's. The flight will be full and people boarding in 3, 4, or 5 lines will not be guaranteed space for their carry on's. Didn't make a difference for me. We mail our luggage and had brought with us an IPAD and two small backpacks for snacks. People started to line up, remember it was still at least 45 minutes b4 boarding), line 3 had at least 50 people on it and all had carry on's. So after the military announcement was made, myself, DH, DS11, DS9, and DD5 made our way to the front. It was tight and people were everywhere. I was basically pulling my son because there were wall to wall people. My DH was in back of me so we waited for him at the front. I was holding all the boarding passes in one hand and my son's hand in the other. While the attendant was checking someone in that was in a wheelchair, a lady tapped me on the shoulder. She told me that I was in the wrong line, my boarding pass says seating 2 and I need to get to the back of the line. I told her I was in the correct area and she should not be looking at my documents. I could hear her huffing and puffing to her husband and trying to get everyone else on the line stirred up as well. I ignored her and proceeded to the gate attendant who was already informed of the situation. Then I heard her say really loudly, "I think we have all been cut in line." I got defensive and even though it was none of her business, I told her my son suffers from Autism and we need to board early. She in turn replied, "I have an ingrown toe nail, I also need to board early. The only reason she wants to board is so she doesn't need to check her carry on's." Seriously.... The gate attendant ignored her. My husband who caught up to us with our other two children did not. He handled it very effectively and put her in her place. Although I was proud of him for speaking up, he can be very intimidating and ripped her apart. The only thing that made me feel better was that she had two teenagers with her that looked completely mortified and when we were on the plane came up to me and apologized for the problems his mom caused.

 

[resablue]

I everyone! We just got back from a fabulous stay at The Wilderness Lodge. Only a couple of things bugged me but none of them had to deal with Disney directly. My middle DS(9) is non-verbal autistic. We kept bumping into a family on the bus that consisted of two adults and two children, probably 12 and 10. I joked we must be on the same travel plan. Well, one day on the bus, the 12 year boy said, very loudly, " Hey Dad, Look, its the (and made the nuts sign with his finger) The mom and dad looked uneasy but did not do say anything to him and just ignored him. My heart sank! My son is the most lovable little boy and he knows ASL. I am just glad he didn't see that sign. So, would you have called them out on what their son said or just let it go. I am so tired of having to educate people on Autism but on the other hand if I don't, my son and other autistic will be viewed as less human. Would you have let it go, ignore them, or spoke up?

I can relate to this. I have a son with autism and at times have reacted differently to this kind of situation, depending on my level of emotional energy. It is so painful to be in this situation, sometimes it was just easier to say nothing, and go on with the day, despite how deeply sad you are at that moment for your child, your family, how much you love them and you want to protect them from this very thing. You want others to see what you see in your child and it hurts to understand that almost certainly behind that other childs jesture is the probability that there was a conversation in that family, complete with adults participation. My son is now 21, and in the begining, it was harder for me to react because I was so hurt. I didn't want my son to be hurt, so it felt easier to not say anything, or worse, pretend I didn't hear or see stuff. But, my non reaction caused me guilt. I felt I had not protected my son. Over the years, I found it more helpful for me and my son to be more forthright in these matters. I cannot change the fact that he has autism and now, he knows what he has, he knows how some people will react, It is empowering because now we have the ability to freely address these kinds of reactions. If it's education about autism that was lacking, well they have now opened the door. And maybe it was the parents ignorance or maybe their kid came to that conclusion on his own (less likely) but either way, I have found that many people are receptive to learning about autism and so maybe the next autistic kid they run across they would look and maybe think, oh, he probably just has autism and maybe understand. Maybe, but at the end of the day, I have learned to do what is best for Me and My Son. That is, to stand up in the face of ignorance and educate.

 

[Mrsjvb]

If the parents looked uneasy, chances are they addressed it with their son after the bus ride. I wouldn't have said a word. I would have just ignored the issue completely and focused on my son for the rest of the ride.

doubtful. and it doesn't work after the fact, just like it doesn't work on puppies when you come home to the shredded slippers.

if the behavior is not addressed immediately, anything that comes along later( punishment, explanation. whatever) loses its' impact.

the parents SHOULD Have immediately made the child apologize for the comment/gesture. that would have made the OP happy, I am quite sure plus been a teachable moment that such things are unacceptable in polite society.

as for what I would have done, probably made some smart @ss comment about rudeness and whatnot. and I would have said it the parents as they are the ones responsible for the teaching of what is and is not appropriate.

 

[DisMom1981]

I think this may have been one of a handful of instances, that it was a child who made, in this instance, an inappropriate remark. In the past, it has been adults. With the adults, I get mad and go into protective mode. When a child makes a remark, I become sad. I mentioned a few bumps in the road on this trip. The other was at the airport. I board early with my family to get my DS9 situated. He gets uneasy and worked up when people loom over him or in crowded situations. We get him seated by the window, snacks, and toys ready. It sets the tone and a routine he is used to. You may think I'm crazy but I book so far in advance, I usually am able to get the same seats on our return departure. We are sitting at the gate waiting to board(we have about an hour). I go to the attendant at the front and briefly explain my situation. As usual, he tells me to approach after first class and military are called. He will inform the gate attendant. As we are waiting, there are multiple announcements requesting that people check their carry on's. The flight will be full and people boarding in 3, 4, or 5 lines will not be guaranteed space for their carry on's. Didn't make a difference for me. We mail our luggage and had brought with us an IPAD and two small backpacks for snacks. People started to line up, remember it was still at least 45 minutes b4 boarding), line 3 had at least 50 people on it and all had carry on's. So after the military announcement was made, myself, DH, DS11, DS9, and DD5 made our way to the front. It was tight and people were everywhere. I was basically pulling my son because there were wall to wall people. My DH was in back of me so we waited for him at the front. I was holding all the boarding passes in one hand and my son's hand in the other. While the attendant was checking someone in that was in a wheelchair, a lady tapped me on the shoulder. She told me that I was in the wrong line, my boarding pass says seating 2 and I need to get to the back of the line. I told her I was in the correct area and she should not be looking at my documents. I could hear her huffing and puffing to her husband and trying to get everyone else on the line stirred up as well. I ignored her and proceeded to the gate attendant who was already informed of the situation. Then I heard her say really loudly, "I think we have all been cut in line." I got defensive and even though it was none of her business, I told her my son suffers from Autism and we need to board early. She in turn replied, "I have an ingrown toe nail, I also need to board early. The only reason she wants to board is so she doesn't need to check her carry on's." Seriously.... The gate attendant ignored her. My husband who caught up to us with our other two children did not. He handled it very effectively and put her in her place. Although I was proud of him for speaking up, he can be very intimidating and ripped her apart. The only thing that made me feel better was that she had two teenagers with her that looked completely mortified and when we were on the plane came up to me and apologized for the problems his mom caused.

So devastating. Good for your DH! Having my son has taught me to put myself in other people's shoes and give the benefit of the doubt- you can't tell circumstances just from the exterior. I make a conscious effort but sill am of course not perfect. Unfortunately- people are quick to criticize and jump to conclusions. Coming from an adult is far more offensive to me.

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[Gregowa]

I guess I have a different view on handling this then many of you. I would have totally corrected my child right then and there and he would have apologized to the family for his/her rudeness. I also would have not been getting off at the stop but rode right back to the hotel with my child. Sorry but that is definitely a behavior that warrants an immediate punishment.

: I agree! If I had been those parents I would have done the same. A talking to later would not have had the same impact and would have provided no apology. If that child is allowed to make this kind of statement and get away with this type of behavior now, who knows what is he going to be doing in the future. Unacceptable behavior calls for immediate discipline with consequences for actions!

 

[crashbb]

This. My son is autistic and he tends to make comments and observations about people that often border on, if not offensive, then at least insensitive. I try my best to teach him about appropriate and inappropriate comments but so far have had little success.

Which makes it so hard. We have no idea if this little boy has some sort of invisible disability. I totally get the urge to respond to the child (or his parents), but you (general you) don't know the full details.

 

[tkbbmom]

This is a hard one for me. First, I would want to address the dc and so, "no sweetie, he's not "nuts", he has Autism. Do you know what that means?..."

The other part of me also feels for the dc that made the statement and the parents bec, while my youngest isn't Autistic he has severe enough SPD/ADHD/LD's that he makes inappropriate comments and questions people and events that a "normal" child would know to perhaps ask quietly about but he shouts it at the top of his lungs. It's an issue we are working on -- daily, hourly, etc. but he just doesn't seem to get why his question or comment is inappropriate.

 

[CoffeeCup]

I think this may have been one of a handful of instances, that it was a child who made, in this instance, an inappropriate remark. In the past, it has been adults. With the adults, I get mad and go into protective mode. When a child makes a remark, I become sad. I mentioned a few bumps in the road on this trip. The other was at the airport. I board early with my family to get my DS9 situated. He gets uneasy and worked up when people loom over him or in crowded situations. We get him seated by the window, snacks, and toys ready. It sets the tone and a routine he is used to. You may think I'm crazy but I book so far in advance, I usually am able to get the same seats on our return departure. We are sitting at the gate waiting to board(we have about an hour). I go to the attendant at the front and briefly explain my situation. As usual, he tells me to approach after first class and military are called. He will inform the gate attendant. As we are waiting, there are multiple announcements requesting that people check their carry on's. The flight will be full and people boarding in 3, 4, or 5 lines will not be guaranteed
space for their carry on's. Didn't make a difference for me. We mail our luggage and had brought with us an IPAD and two small backpacks for snacks. People started to line up, remember it was still at least 45 minutes b4 boarding), line 3 had at least 50 people on it and all had carry on's. So after the military announcement was made, myself, DH, DS11, DS9, and DD5 made our way to the front. It was tight and people were everywhere. I was basically pulling my son because there were wall to wall people. My DH was in back of me so we waited for him at the front. I was holding all the boarding passes in one hand and my son's hand in the other. While the attendant was checking someone in that was in a wheelchair, a lady tapped me on the shoulder. She told me that I was in the wrong line, my boarding pass says seating 2 and I need to get to the back of the line. I told her I was in the correct area and she should not be looking at my documents. I could hear her huffing and puffing to her husband and trying to get everyone else on the line stirred up as well. I ignored her and proceeded to the gate attendant who was already informed of the situation. Then I heard her say really loudly, "I think we have all been cut in line." I got defensive and even though it was none of her business, I told her my son suffers from Autism and we need to board early. She in turn replied, "I have an ingrown toe nail, I also need to board early. The only reason she wants to board is so she doesn't need to check her carry on's." Seriously.... The gate attendant ignored her. My husband who caught up to us with our other two children did not. He handled it very effectively and put her in her place. Although I was proud of him for speaking up, he can be very intimidating and ripped her apart. The only thing that made me feel better was that she had two teenagers with her that looked completely mortified and when we were on the plane came up to me and apologized for the problems his mom caused.

While I understand your frustration and anger with the woman in line, I think you might have been able to avoid the situation if you had told her your child had special needs or simply responded that you had permission to be in that line instead of lecturing her about not looking at your documents. Perhaps she also needed to board early since an ingrown toenail can be very painful. Did she say she wanted to board before others so that she wouldn't have to check her carry on luggage, or did you assume that was her reason? Perhaps you both could have handled the situation better.

I understand the need to get autistic children settled in a seat, but if you were pulling your child through crowds of people to get him on before others, I don't understand how being first avoids the crowds that could upset him. If you had been permitted to board before everyone else lined up, I could understand that you were trying to avoid crowds of people so that your cild wouldn't be upset. Maybe I just don't understand, but if I saw all 5 of you in a line different from the one indicated on your documents, I likely would wonder why your entire family was entitled to get ahead of everyone. I wouldn't say anything to you, but I would be annoyed. Having to check your carry on bags can be a major inconvenience, and many people try to push ahead so they can board and have space to keep their bags near them. I realize that was not what you were doing, but the woman in line with you wouldn't have known that.

I would never challenge anyone trying to board early. That isn't my responsibility, but I've seen gate agents send people back to the line they should be in instead of letting them board when it wasn't their turn. At the same time, I wouldn't be critical of the woman who tried to tell you that you were in the wrong line. She may have been in pain and needed to get to her seat, she may have been trying to be helpful so you wouldn't stand in line, be turned away, and have to get in the back of your assigned line, or she may have been a tired person who resented your getting to go ahead of her her and treated you rudely to express how she felt. I wasn't there, I'm not judging you or the other woman, but I think you both could have handled the situation better to avoid bad feelings.

 

[MonsterWDWmom]

I think this may have been one of a handful of instances, that it was a child who made, in this instance, an inappropriate remark. In the past, it has been adults. With the adults, I get mad and go into protective mode. When a child makes a remark, I become sad. I mentioned a few bumps in the road on this trip. The other was at the airport. I board early with my family to get my DS9 situated. He gets uneasy and worked up when people loom over him or in crowded situations. We get him seated by the window, snacks, and toys ready. It sets the tone and a routine he is used to. You may think I'm crazy but I book so far in advance, I usually am able to get the same seats on our return departure. We are sitting at the gate waiting to board(we have about an hour). I go to the attendant at the front and briefly explain my situation. As usual, he tells me to approach after first class and military are called. He will inform the gate attendant. As we are waiting, there are multiple announcements requesting that people check their carry on's. The flight will be full and people boarding in 3, 4, or 5 lines will not be guaranteed space for their carry on's. Didn't make a difference for me. We mail our luggage and had brought with us an IPAD and two small backpacks for snacks. People started to line up, remember it was still at least 45 minutes b4 boarding), line 3 had at least 50 people on it and all had carry on's. So after the military announcement was made, myself, DH, DS11, DS9, and DD5 made our way to the front. It was tight and people were everywhere. I was basically pulling my son because there were wall to wall people. My DH was in back of me so we waited for him at the front. I was holding all the boarding passes in one hand and my son's hand in the other. While the attendant was checking someone in that was in a wheelchair, a lady tapped me on the shoulder. She told me that I was in the wrong line, my boarding pass says seating 2 and I need to get to the back of the line. I told her I was in the correct area and she should not be looking at my documents. I could hear her huffing and puffing to her husband and trying to get everyone else on the line stirred up as well. I ignored her and proceeded to the gate attendant who was already informed of the situation. Then I heard her say really loudly, "I think we have all been cut in line." I got defensive and even though it was none of her business, I told her my son suffers from Autism and we need to board early. She in turn replied, "I have an ingrown toe nail, I also need to board early. The only reason she wants to board is so she doesn't need to check her carry on's." Seriously.... The gate attendant ignored her. My husband who caught up to us with our other two children did not. He handled it very effectively and put her in her place. Although I was proud of him for speaking up, he can be very intimidating and ripped her apart. The only thing that made me feel better was that she had two teenagers with her that looked completely mortified and when we were on the plane came up to me and apologized for the problems his mom caused.

I think that you handled this great, the women should not have been looking at your documents and was horribly wrong about the things she said to you. It is the airport's jobs to make sure that people are in the right line and if they are not to send them back. She should have let the airline workers do their jobs and kept her nose out of it. I hope your husband gave her a handful!

 

[minkydog]

This is a hard one for me. First, I would want to address the dc and so, "no sweetie, he's not "nuts", he has Autism. Do you know what that means?..."

My son Christian has been on the receiving end of some pretty rude stuff, sometimes from adults who ought to know better, and sometimes from kids who may or may not know better. With kids I usually take the approach of "he's more like you than you think." I tell them that he had a hard time learning thins and he cannot talk, but he's a good listener. I say, "Christian likes swimming, do you like swimming? Do you like ice cream? Christian likes ice cream!" and so forth. I have seen kids change right before my eyes.

Adults are another situation. If they are brazen enough to say inappropriate things,I'm not going to change their mind. I may give them a withering look and say they should be ashamed to treat a child like that and usually they mumble an apology and beat a hasty retreat. I am not going to dress them down in front of my son or in any way embarrass my family by taking on idiots in public.

You have to develop a thick skin when you're raising a handicapped child.

 

[DOREEN1779]

While I understand your frustration and anger with the woman in line, I think you might have been able to avoid the situation if you had told her your child had special needs or simply responded that you had permission to be in that line instead of lecturing her about not looking at your documents. Perhaps she also needed to board early since an ingrown toenail can be very painful. Did she say she wanted to board before others so that she wouldn't have to check her carry on luggage, or did you assume that was her reason? Perhaps you both could have handled the situation better.

I understand the need to get autistic children settled in a seat, but if you were pulling your child through crowds of people to get him on before others, I don't understand how being first avoids the crowds that could upset him. If you had been permitted to board before everyone else lined up, I could understand that you were trying to avoid crowds of people so that your cild wouldn't be upset. Maybe I just don't understand, but if I saw all 5 of you in a line different from the one indicated on your documents, I likely would wonder why your entire family was entitled to get ahead of everyone. I wouldn't say anything to you, but I would be annoyed. Having to check your carry on bags can be a major inconvenience, and many people try to push ahead so they can board and have space to keep their bags near them. I realize that was not what you were doing, but the woman in line with you wouldn't have known that.

I would never challenge anyone trying to board early. That isn't my responsibility, but I've seen gate agents send people back to the line they should be in instead of letting them board when it wasn't their turn. At the same time, I wouldn't be critical of the woman who tried to tell you that you were in the wrong line. She may have been in pain and needed to get to her seat, she may have been trying to be helpful so you wouldn't stand in line, be turned away, and have to get in the back of your assigned line, or she may have been a tired person who resented your getting to go ahead of her her and treated you rudely to express how she felt. I wasn't there, I'm not judging you or the other woman, but I think you both could have handled the situation better to avoid bad feelings.

With all due respect, I do take issue with a couple of things you said. I was navigating through a sea of people that were not in the line but overflowing past the ropes. The benefits of putting my son safely in a seat prior to the general public ensures a safe and happy trip for my family as well as the other passengers. You don't know what sets him off, I do and that is why we board early. It was not a normal situation, otherwise we would not have been blocked. Secondly, she must have been straining to look at those boarding passes. That is not OK. Lastly, her snarky tone was not one of concern or trying to be helpful. It was an attempt to embarrass me. Also, comparing Autism to having an ingrown toenail is revolting and insensitive.You said we both could have handled it differently, so what was it I should have done?

 

[DOREEN1779]

Also, she was the one who commented about the checked luggage, so it was clearly a concern of hers and she was in no pain. The ingrown toenail comment was sarcastic in tone.

 

[DisMom1981]

Doreen- :hugs:


This should be a place people can safely go to for support! Not a place to criticize and shoot people who are living with a disability or who have loved ones with disabilities down!

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

 

[1000HappyWishes]

I would've said something. The child needs to be educated as to what Autism is and not associate it with being "nuts." It seems clear his parents won't be doing it, so the sooner he understands, the better. I don't let anyone make fun of people in public, no mater their age. I will call them out on it.

 

[tinkerpea]

With all due respect, I do take issue with a couple of things you said. I was navigating through a sea of people that were not in the line but overflowing past the ropes. The benefits of putting my son safely in a seat prior to the general public ensures a safe and happy trip for my family as well as the other passengers. You don't know what sets him off, I do and that is why we board early. It was not a normal situation, otherwise we would not have been blocked. Secondly, she must have been straining to look at those boarding passes. That is not OK. Lastly, her snarky tone was not one of concern or trying to be helpful. It was an attempt to embarrass me. Also, comparing Autism to having an ingrown toenail is revolting and insensitive.You said we both could have handled it differently, so what was it I should have done?

I completely agree with your response to this poster,
I have no idea what you could have done differently?
I have a 10 year old with autism who also needs to be settled on the plane by the window before people start pushing past and knocking him in the head with bags as they are passing!
The anxiety of getting in the plane seated and prepared for the flight is in no way comparable to pulling a child through a stream of people so that your child can finally be out of the manic Que.

You would have to be being pretty nosey to see what line your boarding pass had in it! And I would have been beyond annoyed for that invasion of privacy!
I also once being confronted with " I have an ingrown toenail I need to be seated 1st too" would have been utterly mad and would have said something loud enough to make sure thy she felt ashamed and embarrassed of herself.

We was at a theme park the other day which has a system where you can go to all the exits and head to the que that way, they also sell fast pass tickets,
While we was heading to our ride 2 lady's came up to us and said we was heading the wrong way for the fast pass line, we kindly said thank you but we are in the correct line for what we need ( thinking she was just trying to be helpful) she turned huffed and said what could possibly be wrong that you need to get privileged ride pass a non of us was in a wheelchair! i told her it was non of her concern she shouted out another faker and walked on! everybody in the other line turned to look at us but on top of our son with autism I also have in place a pic line as I have been having invasive antibiotic therapy for the last 3 months to stop an infection reaching my brain.
It was very hot and I had a short sleeved top on so the picc line could be seen, so I just turned around and somebody noticed the line and shouted out how disgusting it was that the rude lady had no manners, and how horrible it must be to not only be that sick but to have to put up with somebody like that running a lovely day!

The lady ended up huddling behind her friend and staring at the ground till she got on the ride, with her other friend looking very embarrassed!

We have had to deal with some awful moments and I think we have a right to deal with them how we see fit at the time.

Another quick example of rude assumption I was getting into my car and was parked in the disabled bay ( I have a temporary card while going through treatment) a taxi was parked behind so We couldn't get out, my dh went over and asked the driver to kindly move up, as he walked back to the car a older women shouted at him that She would not have moved the car as we had no right to be in the disabled space, my dh said we had every right to be in it,

I got out and asked what the problem was and she shouted very loudly " obviously trying to embarrass and shame us" that its disgusting how young people think they can park where ever they like taking up a space meant for others, now there was quite a few people who had all stopped as they was taking their trolleys back to see what was going on,
I explained that we had a badge and she asked to see it, dh said can you clearly not see the huge head bandage around my head and the picc line, plus informed her I had just had major head surgery he showed her the badge and all her reply was GOOD maybe you should display it more clearly next time lol!!!

 

[CoffeeCup]

I completely agree with your response to this poster,
I have no idea what you could have done differently?
I have a 10 year old with autism who also needs to be settled on the plane by the window before people start pushing past and knocking him in the head with bags as they are passing!
The anxiety of getting in the plane seated and prepared for the flight is in no way comparable to pulling a child through a stream of people so that your child can finally be out of the manic Que.

You would have to be being pretty nosey to see what line your boarding pass had in it! And I would have been beyond annoyed for that invasion of privacy!
I also once being confronted with " I have an ingrown toenail I need to be seated 1st too" would have been utterly mad and would have said something loud enough to make sure thy she felt ashamed and embarrassed of herself.

We was at a theme park the other day which has a system where you can go to all the exits and head to the que that way, they also sell fast pass tickets,
While we was heading to our ride 2 lady's came up to us and said we was heading the wrong way for the fast pass line, we kindly said thank you but we are in the correct line for what we need ( thinking she was just trying to be helpful) she turned huffed and said what could possibly be wrong that you need to get privileged ride pass a non of us was in a wheelchair! i told her it was non of her concern she shouted out another faker and walked on! everybody in the other line turned to look at us but on top of our son with autism I also have in place a pic line as I have been having invasive antibiotic therapy for the last 3 months to stop an infection reaching my brain.
It was very hot and I had a short sleeved top on so the picc line could be seen, so I just turned around and somebody noticed the line and shouted out how disgusting it was that the rude lady had no manners, and how horrible it must be to not only be that sick but to have to put up with somebody like that running a lovely day!

The lady ended up huddling behind her friend and staring at the ground till she got on the ride, with her other friend looking very embarrassed!

We have had to deal with some awful moments and I think we have a right to deal with them how we see fit at the time.

Another quick example of rude assumption I was getting into my car and was parked in the disabled bay ( I have a temporary card while going through treatment) a taxi was parked behind so We couldn't get out, my dh went over and asked the driver to kindly move up, as he walked back to the car a older women shouted at him that She would not have moved the car as we had no right to be in the disabled space, my dh said we had every right to be in it,

I got out and asked what the problem was and she shouted very loudly " obviously trying to embarrass and shame us" that its disgusting how young people think they can park where ever they like taking up a space meant for others, now there was quite a few people who had all stopped as they was taking their trolleys back to see what was going on,
I explained that we had a badge and she asked to see it, dh said can you clearly not see the huge head bandage around my head and the picc line, plus informed her I had just had major head surgery he showed her the badge and all her reply was GOOD maybe you should display it more clearly next time lol!!!

With all due respect, I already have suggested that the situation in line to board the plane MIGHT have been avoided by telling the woman you had a special needs child or simply that you had permission to be in that line. That might not have helped at all, and the woman may have been a rude and confrontational person who didn't care about you or your child. I would have offered a reson for being in a line different from the one on my boarding pass, and I would not have considered it an invasion of my privacy. That is how I would have handled the situation, but you certainly have the right to deal with situations as you see fit.

I respect the fact that you were protecting the needs of your child, and I fully realize that you have to deal with some awful situations. In my opinion, it is easier to deal with difficult situations by excusing some of the things people do and say instead of being offended. I don't need stress and anger in my life, and I go out of my way to avoid those things. We all are different, and we handle things differently. You may disagree with my opinions and solutions to problems in life, and I respect that.

 

[DOREEN1779]

With all due respect, I already have suggested that the situation in line to board the plane MIGHT have been avoided by telling the woman you had a special needs child or simply that you had permission to be in that line. That might not have helped at all, and the woman may have been a rude and confrontational person who didn't care about you or your child. I would have offered a reson for being in a line different from the one on my boarding pass, and I would not have considered it an invasion of my privacy. That is how I would have handled the situation, but you certainly have the right to deal with situations as you see fit.

I respect the fact that you were protecting the needs of your child, and I fully realize that you have to deal with some awful situations. In my opinion, it is easier to deal with difficult situations by excusing some of the things people do and say instead of being offended. I don't need stress and anger in my life, and I go out of my way to avoid those things. We all are different, and we handle things differently. You may disagree with my opinions and solutions to problems in life, and I respect that.

Again, I respect your opinion on how you would have dealt with the situation but I did not ask your opinion on if I had handled the situation correctly. I was looking for insight from people who have been in similar situations and how they handled those situations and not a critique on what I could have done better. I was looking for a bit of support, not to start an argument on public decorum. Heck, I don't need stress and anger in my life either but sometimes a person needs to speak up or changes will never happen. I am also a bit shocked that you think someone peering over your shoulder to look at your documents isn't an invasion of privacy but that is my opinion and I tend to be very careful with anything that has my name on it.

 

[MinnieLovesMickey12]

I guess I have a different view on handling this then many of you. I would have totally corrected my child right then and there and he would have apologized to the family for his/her rudeness. I also would have not been getting off at the stop but rode right back to the hotel with my child. Sorry but that is definitely a behavior that warrants an immediate punishment.

I have to agree with this. If one of my kids had said something so rude and insensitive I would have corrected them right in that moment right in front of the parent of the special needs kid. I probably would told my kid "shut your rude mouth and apologize to those ppl for acting like a rude brat" But my kids would be mortified if anybody acted like that in front of them. I know they would never do that or say that about anybody. First of all I raised them better than that and second of all they know momma don't put up with that kinda crap ever. It wouldn't fly with me.

I have taught my kids from the time they were old enough to understand English that you treat others exactly how you want them to treat you. And I have told them a thousand times, before you ever say or do anything think about how it might make someone else feel if you do that.

I am so outspoken that if I had just been a witness to that and not involved I still might have said something myself to that kid's parents. The one who made the crazy gesture. i can't stand to see anybody ridiculed or bullied.

 

[Shelly F - Ohio]

I think it I were in your shoes, after the gate agent took my boarding pass, I would have turned around and waved goodbye to the woman.