I get the sense that some posters on this thread know each other in real life -- or there is some stalking going on. Given that I fall in neither of those categories, I'm simply taking the poster at face value.
A lot of the posters on this thread clearly have never had to deal with an extremely dysfunctional family. Just call CPS you say? I don't think you have an idea of the truly horrible situations that CPS typically deals with. Animal feces on the floor, they aren't coming out for that -- probably not even for a marijuana plant either. But, I too, wouldn't want my kids hanging out in a place like that. You would just offer to help them out? I feel so horrible for my DH who for years thought that if he helped enough is family would change -- he was always crushed when the minute he was gone everything would go to pot again (no pun intended). It isn't as simple and black and white as you may think.
And some MILs (or any other family members really) are extremely manipulative and messed up themselves. Now, granted, that is the reason I would never leave my kids with my MIL, but this idea that because they are a grandparent they have the best interests of your kids is just wrong.
Having known someone in a similar situation (though not nearly as bad as the OP is describing), CPS does in fact come out for the horrid conditions the OP is describing. They gave the mom a chance to clean up and make the home suitable or her kids would have been removed. She got it cleaned up satisfactorily and got to keep the kids and I honestly can't say if they did many (or any) follow up checks, but at least the house was clean and safe for a period of time.
And fwiw, I don't know any of these posters in real life, but after reading references to previous situations with the inlaws, I did look through the OP's post history and was shocked by some of the comments. It seems she just hates these people for whatever reason and finds fault with everything they do.
For the record - I don't know anyone in real life on this thread, nor the DIS for that matter.
Here in Canada, our laws are a bit different, but it's not as easy as one thinks to call for these types of issues either. Heck, most of my at-risk students admit criminal activities to us, and as teachers bound by law, we have to report, and not much gets done in certain cases. It is difficult around here, as our CAS workers are overworked and understaffed, not to mention, the cops are trying to deal with the flood of narcotics that are on the streets. I'm not sure how this situation would play out in my city, if indeed it were true?
So, although I think the OP clearly has some major issues, based on this thread, and her other rants about people in general, there are many issues at play here. She absolutely has the right to not want her child around drugs or dirt, so not sure what the issue is for many people in regards to those topics? If people are trying to figure out if indeed the OP is telling the truth, that is another matter entirely, but if it comes to drugs, criminal activities or neglect, than her child should not be around that. But, and it's a big but, neither should her nephews.
If everything OP says is true, and I don't believe all of it is, then her DH's family are dysfunctional enablers, which is very common when dealing with adddictions. I live in this world each and everyday with my students and their families, and truthfully, the only person that can be controlled in that situation is the OP. She can, and should keep her daughter out of that mess, and if I find out my husband or mother in law brought my child to that dysfunctional household (if indeed it exists as such), there would be major hell to pay around here.
There are lots of issues in this thread, and many posters are judgmental against the OP for her dramatic and frankly rude threads. This should not take away from the fact that if indeed that house is as she describes, then her child should not be over there, period.
As far as mother in law, clearly she does not share the same feelings as the OP, so knowing this, she cannot use her as a babysitter, end of story. Our car lots are outside around here, so she could have put baby in car, and one of them could have stayed with her, while the other looked/drove around, and then one at a time could have entered the dealership. We've actually done this, and there are no issues involved.
If OP truly is troubled by her mother in law, then she does
not babysit, end of story. Basically, her car was more important than her Princess. Clearly, OP is naive, since if drugs are involved, you cannot reason with people at all, so despite wanting her mother in law to abide by her wishes, she has proven she cannot, so by OP still using her to babysit, this is neglectful to her child and hypocritical.
Lots of interesting replies on this thread, and hopefully OP has learned, from this one, and her other threads, that many people have pre-conceived judgments of her, and in that respect, nothing that she says will be taken seriously, IMHO. Wanting to truly protect your child, which I can assume all of us want to do, is one thing, but ranting about how no one can measure up to you, is clearly another. So, although it seems that DH and his family may have some serious issues, so does the OP in her perception of the world around her.
I have to imagine if the OP conducts herself as she does on the DIS, then I can't imagine many people taking her seriously, most of all her hubby and mother in law.
Tiger
I don't know what is more suprising to me - that this thread is till going or that I keep reading it.
