OT: Restroom Vent

[goudaman40]

Hello all,

I just had to get this off of my chest and also to see if anyone else has experienced the same things as I have.

This past week, my husband, myself, and my MIL went to a national chain restaurant for a late lunch. The meal was great, service was great, and it was an overall wonderful time. Well, while hubby was waiting on the bill, I took MIL to the restroom (for the just in case).

We get to the restroom to find two regular stalls empty, but the HA was occupied. (There are a total of 3 stalls). I polietly knock on the door and see if anyone is in there; we have been to some restrooms, where children will play in the HA and lock the door and crawl out from underneath).
Anyway, the lady in the stall says :I'm taking a @#$%, it will be a while, can't you use another stall? I explain, that the HA stall is the only one that will accomodate us, and no, we can't use another stall. She pipes back "Well, it's not my fault you have to use this toliet . . . get over it and use the other ones . . . I was here first!"

At this time, my MIL is getting upset, and on the verge of not being able to hold any longer . . . I go to the manager and explain the situation (quickly) and he checks the men's restroom . . . gives us the all clear and let's us use the HA toliet in the mens restroom. The manager had an employee outside "guarding" and a close sign, until MIL and I finished.

Well, we come out and find the "woman" talking with the manager, giving him an earfull about how a "rude woman, in a wheelchair . . . demanded that she come out of the toliet. She also went into a rant about how this was America and she had the right to use any @$@%$ toliet that she wanted and that it wasn't her fault that my MIL was in a chair and that she (MIL) should suck it up and get over it and use the other toliets that were there!"

The manager polietly listened and told said woman that she needed to do a little research into ADA before she goes on with her rant about her "right" to use any toliet. The manager then came to us and apologized for this ladies behavior and offered to pay our tab. MIL, hubby, and I polietly refused his offer and explained that he did more than enough by allowing us to use the men's restroom and taking up for MIL.

Thanks for letting me vent . . .

 

[Adrienne]

Hugs to you and i must say that i'm impressed with the manager offering to pay the tab. Just goes to show that for all the coal in there world there are still plenty of diamonds hey?

Adrienne

 

[3DisneyNUTS]

I am impressed that the manager cited the ADA! Woohoo for him. What was the chain so we can patronize a place that has their priorities straight?

 

[missypie]

Some people have extreme anger problems and personality disorders. Sounds like you found one of those in the restroom!

 

[rbork]

I wouldn't make excuses for this "women". Some people are just plain trash.
Sorry, but this gets my gull. Glad the manager helped. Kudo's for him/her.

 

[Debbie Jean]

I wouldn't make excuses for this "women". Some people are just plain trash.
Sorry, but this gets my gull. Glad the manager helped. Kudo's for him/her.

And aren't you glad you weren't on vacation with this woman??? You at least got to leave her at the restaurant!

 

[Pinnie]

Manager sounded like a very CLASSY guy! It was very nice of him to offer to pick up your tab.

The woman in the bathroom better pray she never NEEDS to use a HA bathroom in her life. I have been in the position of having to wait with my 85 yr old mom who has a walker for the HA stall on many occasions.

pinnie

 

[Buckimion]

Sorry if slightly OT, but I saw this thread and had to add my own $.02

A couple of weeks ago at Disneyland I was waiting in my ECV for my turn. (Standing room only, as it were.) I start rolling forward to take the next 'station' as it cleared out and this bozo dodges around me to get to it first, saying he couldn't wait and I 'had a seat'. I let the matter go as another opened at that moment but I was so irked that this guy was so rude...I wanted to tinkle on his shoes.

 

[Talking Hands]

This is a problem even at Disney. Frequently the HC stall is used by able bodied people with children or not even when other stalls are available. Their feeling seems to be that it isn't exclusively for those with handicaps so we should get over it. The attitude is apalling. I have been told even on DIS that it isn't like a HC placard and they will use it anytime they want and handicapped should just wait their turn and shut up. I give up and don't even bother to reply in these threads anymore because it is hopeless and certain people will never get it until they become handicapped themselves. IT IS ALL ABOUT THEM! and their convenience and the don't give a darn about anyone else. Did get one though when I was in a real *****y mood. Parked my power wheelchair blocking the HC stall door and trapped the person and her kids in the stall while I struggled to get in the regular stall next to it. She was furious and I just siled and said sorry I din't want to wet my pants and if she hadn't been in a HC stall it wouldn't happen. Too bad!

 

[Laurajean1014]

Well. I feel bad for any one in this type of position.

However, if the woman wants to use it and no-one else is going to, then fine.

I think she could have said, "I'm sorry. When I came in it was empty - or it was the only one available at that time." "I needed to go, but I did not think that someone needing HA would be in at the same time I was here." I will be done in a moment to accomodate you."

There is no need for anyone to get upset. Sometimes bad situations happen. It was nice of the manager to allow your MIL to go in the Men's Room and wait til she was done. It was also more than accommodating that he offered to pay your bill (?).

I see lots of people use the HA stalls. I don't understand why. I'm petite and the toilet is too tall for me and I don't need all that room. I do notice families or mom's with kids using them, but I honestly cannot blame them. Do you remember how tight it was to fit one or two small kids and a mom in a stall?

If the restaurants and parks made the stalls a foot or two larger, than there would not be a need to use the HA for other than HA reasons.

 

[Morveryn]

How awful that you had to experience this at all let alone at Disney. I thank the Lord that I am not like that woman. Remeber most people are kind, even if its the few rude ones that stick in our minds.

 

[kathyk2]

Talking Hands I agree with you. Do these people think that the grab bars are there for decoration? Why should the needs of people with children come before those of us without kids? I will make an exception for moms who need to use the changing station inside the handicapped stalls.

 

[goudaman40]

thanks to all for your kind words . . . this didn't happen at Disney . ..

The chain is new here in Pensacola . . . Smokey Bones is the name of the restaurant.

I have seen several families use the HA stall & the reason why, is because that is where the changing table is.

 

[taximomfor4]

This is a problem even at Disney. Frequently the HC stall is used by able bodied people with children or not even when other stalls are available. Their feeling seems to be that it isn't exclusively for those with handicaps so we should get over it. The attitude is apalling. I have been told even on DIS that it isn't like a HC placard and they will use it anytime they want and handicapped should just wait their turn and shut up. I give up and don't even bother to reply in these threads anymore because it is hopeless and certain people will never get it until they become handicapped themselves. IT IS ALL ABOUT THEM! and their convenience and the don't give a darn about anyone else. Did get one though when I was in a real *****y mood. Parked my power wheelchair blocking the HC stall door and trapped the person and her kids in the stall while I struggled to get in the regular stall next to it. She was furious and I just siled and said sorry I din't want to wet my pants and if she hadn't been in a HC stall it wouldn't happen. Too bad!

Hi Talking Hands! How are those violists of yours doing? Mine just returned from her annual Strings Camp where she moved up to the second-to-the-top orchestra this year!!

Anyway, just wanted to throw out there, although I am sure you are quite aware of this situation already, that some of us parents in the HA stall with our children are there because our children have special needs. No way would I fit me and 2 kids (sometimes 3 kids) in a regular stall, and have room to lift dd safely. Anyway, the HA stall has the bars which we really depend on. I always feel terrible, and we REALLY HURRY in case someone else needing HA comes in. So if, at WDW, you see a mom in the HA stall with her kids, don't get too mad too quickly, it might very well be us. We wish we had a good alternative, but with companion restrooms just as popular, we have to use the HA stall sometimes.

Oh, I should say that the OP's story is pretty rude! Perhaps when that woman got there, the other 2 stalls were taken?? But there is really no excuse for rudeness!

 

[pjpoohbear]

I view a handicap stall in a public washroom the same as I would a handicap disignated parking space. It does not matter that there may not a handicapped person within my eyesight, it is there for their use at anytime.

Why should a handicap person have to lose their dignity waiting for the single stall that is avaliable to them, because someone who really did not need that stall in within.

That other person is able to use a least two other stalls and in Disney many many more! The average person may have to wait less then a minute for the next avaliable stall. While I have seen a handicapped person wait for more than 5 minutes while a mother and her two children were taking turns in the handicap stall, she said she needed the extra space to bring her double stroller inside. I bet she left it outside of many rides that day.

(Taximom: you need to use the HA stall, so you have nothing to worry about, it is those who see the handicap, not being used and generally they will cut the line and head towards it. It is a shortcut for them, not a needed help. Its those who do not understand that some people, like your child, do not have the option of using a regular stall, and my be put in a place of losing their diginity due to extended waits for the only stall that is useable for them.)

There are, in most Disney washrooms, at least one or more extra long stalls that will hold an adult and several children. Generally that stall is next to the handicap stall, but does not have the needed grab bars.

The only exception I would never have something to say about, would be the cases where the establishment places the changing table in the handicap stall.

I will always wait an extra thirty seconds for regular stall, so that the handicap stall is avaliable to those who need it. Remember, we only have to undo a button, zipper and push down and sit, they have to drive in, turn around, park, transfer to toilet seat, then undo a button, zipper, and push down, it will always take a handicap person much longer to get ready to go to the washroom, than an able bodied person. Why risk taking another's dignity, when we don't have to.

Penny

 

[kaytieeldr]

I have been in a long line at a theater during intermission when all the stalls were being used. A handicapped woman and companion came into the restroom and, as soon as the person in the HP stall was done, the rest of the line intelligently and politely let these two women go right in.

Frankly, I don't get it either. There are two HP stalls where I work, and I'm about the only one who doesn't use them. Heck, I just head for the nearest stall <G>

For that matter, whose idea was it to locate the HP stalls as far from the restroom door as possible? This isn't always the case (as in the theater incident above, and one of the restrooms in Africa at AK) but just as HP parking spaces are located to get handicapped persons out of the flow of traffic as quickly as possible, why aren't the bathrooms designed the same way?

 

[pjpoohbear]

Excellent point!

 

[triplefigs]

I'm sorry you had a problem, but I'm very impressed with the manager. I'm sure that lady will get hers in life. As my mom says, "What goes around, comes around"

 

[Talking Hands]

Hi Talking Hands! How are those violists of yours doing? Mine just returned from her annual Strings Camp where she moved up to the second-to-the-top orchestra this year!!

Anyway, just wanted to throw out there, although I am sure you are quite aware of this situation already, that some of us parents in the HA stall with our children are there because our children have special needs. No way would I fit me and 2 kids (sometimes 3 kids) in a regular stall, and have room to lift dd safely. Anyway, the HA stall has the bars which we really depend on. I always feel terrible, and we REALLY HURRY in case someone else needing HA comes in. So if, at WDW, you see a mom in the HA stall with her kids, don't get too mad too quickly, it might very well be us. We wish we had a good alternative, but with companion restrooms just as popular, we have to use the HA stall sometimes.

Oh, I should say that the OP's story is pretty rude! Perhaps when that woman got there, the other 2 stalls were taken?? But there is really no excuse for rudeness!

Oldest is heading for Californai and the Mancini Institute in 2 weeks.

And you are using a handicapped stall for the purpose it is meant for. Your child needs that stall. I really don't mind even the Mom we several very small ones. Now when they are old enough to toilet themselves (6or7) the no longer need to go in that stall with Mom but use a separate stall and then wait for mom outside the stall until mom is done. Actually depending on the park I don't know why anyone would want the handicapped stall, You can't even get a wheelchair in them.

 

[triplefigs]

Anyway, just wanted to throw out there, although I am sure you are quite aware of this situation already, that some of us parents in the HA stall with our children are there because our children have special needs. No way would I fit me and 2 kids (sometimes 3 kids) in a regular stall, and have room to lift dd safely. Anyway, the HA stall has the bars which we really depend on. I always feel terrible, and we REALLY HURRY in case someone else needing HA comes in. So if, at WDW, you see a mom in the HA stall with her kids, don't get too mad too quickly, it might very well be us. We wish we had a good alternative, but with companion restrooms just as popular, we have to use the HA stall sometimes

I use the HA stall too with my trio. I have to help my 2 with CP, but looking at them you'd never know they have issues. They have low muscle tone and my DD especially has trouble lifting herself onto the toilet.