Genuinely curious about wanting a private table

[OKW Lover]

My exception to this would have been a cruise on the Wonder back in 2009 when we ended up at a table for 6 (or was it 8?) at Palo Brunch. I'm glad I met some people then.

Pretty sure it was 8.

 

[Dug720]

I agree it is a great opportunity to meet and learn about others, however on most cruises that's not what I'm looking to do. My exception to this would have been a cruise on the Wonder back in 2009 when we ended up at a table for 6 (or was it 8?) at Palo Brunch. I'm glad I met some people then.

Wait, wait, wait. You're saying they put you with others at Palo??? I have NEVER heard of that. Palo (and Remy) are the places where it's supposed to be guaranteed your own table I thought.

 

[twoprincesses12]

Our family of 4 (2 DD 7&9) have cruised DCL for the last 3 Years in January. Otherwise, we have also cruised Norwegian and have found we enjoy the Freestyle dining more. That being said, we have been on the Fantasy & we usually skip our dining rotation on at least 3 of the 4 nights. Of the 3 Disney cruises, we were only seated with another family 1X and the girls were a perfect match with the other family's kids. No worries on small talk and we found our table location to be the best for enjoying the dining rooms. It is still not our preference, but we have not had a bad experience.

 

[KayKayJS]

For me it's just not worth it anymore. Only one of our cruises were we matched up with someone we actually enjoyed talking to, they were a honeymooning couple from Australia and we loved seeing them each night. But that is rare. My other experiences have been either people who are snobs and don't want to speak at all, or people just complete opposite of us. I don't wanna hear about how amazing your kids are (I don't have kids and even if I did I don't care...) and brag about your job. I have a great job too, but I'm sure as hell not gonna brag. This isn't a contest. When we're matched up with people like this, I dread the MDR so we end up skipping it, and Disney cruises are too expensive to have to skip out on things because of other people.

There are just very few people I actually enjoy talking to, so now we just request a table to ourselves. On our last cruise, we were sat close to another family (but different table) and we did end up talking to them and seeing them around on the cruise, and we made friends with another family whose child was getting into a hobby we are involved in, and enjoyed talking to them around the ship as well.

 

[OKW Lover]

Wait, wait, wait. You're saying they put you with others at Palo??? I have NEVER heard of that. Palo (and Remy) are the places where it's supposed to be guaranteed your own table I thought.

No that's not what happened. We were part of the first DIS Podcast Cruise and this was a group event. My wife and I were paired up with 3 other couples for brunch that day, one of which was Katie and her husband.

You are correct that you would not be seated with others at Remy or Palo.

 

[Dug720]

No that's not what happened. We were part of the first DIS Podcast Cruise and this was a group event. My wife and I were paired up with 3 other couples for brunch that day, one of which was Katie and her husband.

You are correct that you would not be seated with others at Remy or Palo.

Gotcha. Thank you for clarifying. The way it read it sounded like it was a not-planned thing.

 

[Chica1581]

Unfortunately, we did not get a good match on our last cruise and had to request a separate table during the cruise. We were lucky they were able to accommodate us at a separate table for ourselves.

 

[AngelDisney]

First time cruising DCL in 2004, I didn't know about being able to request a private table and our family of 3 was seated with two other families at a 8-top table. It was great that DD got to bond with a girl who's a year older and cruising with her dad only. They were having fun all the time, giggling and talking among themselves. However, DH and I had an awful time with the other family of 3. The dad bragged about his life the whole time and it's just too tiring to entertain others after a long day as we had the second seating. From then on only DD and I have been cruising. DH doesn't like travelling much and he has stopped joining us on trips. DD and I prefer to have some quality private time at dinner: enjoying the food, taking food porn, talking about our day and planning for the next day without having to consider other people's feelings or needs. We always request a private table for two and touching wood our request has always been granted.

 

[FigmentSpark]

For me, it's simple. We are THAT family. You know, the ones that bicker and order stuff without the onions or extra bread. And my teens kick each other under the table, even though we don't let them sit across from each other. I'm not a bad parent, I just have kids who like to challenge. Anyway, pair that with me, who stresses about disrupting others and it would make our meals miserable, as well as the other family's. Then, I'd come here after the cruise, and that thread with all the horrible tablemate stories would be resurrected and we'd be the ones they'd be talking about... then I'd have to leave this great board out of embarrassment and I'd have those events and words swirling in my head for many years to come as epic failures... might never go on a cruise again for the same reason.

So, no tablemates, please. And yes, we tipped extra.

 

[RedSox68]

I see so many on here that are very concerned about getting their own table. I understand this for those with certain food allergies, but for everyone else I am curious as to why?

We honestly have found that Disney does a great job at matching people and have made some life long friends with some of our table mates. So that leaves me wondering why so many are so insistent, even at lunch and character breakfasts.

Not putting anyone down in anyway for their preference, we all have likes and dislikes, just honestly curious.

Personal preference. We have done the social seatings on our first 6 cruises and did not have enough good experiences to warrant waiting for all guests before being served or rude behavior by other table guests. We decided that we enjoyed sitting together and chatting and didn't need to experience any one else's day or table manners. Almost all the cruises we have taken on other lines don't have multi seating tables anymore. They offer 2 and 4 seat tables and we never found an issue with getting our own table. And from what I have heard, Disney is breaking away from the large seating tables and allowing families their own tables.

The last time we had table mates (we didn't know) was the Med cruise in 2007 -- they were from England and were constantly fighting, one or both parents leaving the table and leaving their child behind. They tried twice to dump their daughter on our older daughter to "babysit", and were always at least 20-25 minutes late. We finally told the wait staff to stop waiting for them and serve us when we arrived on time so we could get out of there before 10:30!

Many like to socialize on cruises and enjoy meeting other people, but for us it was not always a good experience and we never thought we needed that social experience to make our cruise more fun. Our cruises have always been about family time and not social time.

 

[CamColt]

Gotcha. Thank you for clarifying. The way it read it sounded like it was a not-planned thing.

Yes, we had not planned to sit with the other 3 couples specifically, however upon arrival for this special event, people were just sort of grouped together at random. But no, at any other normal Palo meal you will not be seated with others.

Sorry to have caused any confusion.

 

[bumbershoot]

I'm also very much a pleaser by nature, so if my dd's were acting up, I don't think I'd have a clear head on how to deal with them. I'd be way too worried about whether we are ruining someone else's meal.

The tables are close. If your kids are behaving in a way they would ruin the meal for someone at the table, they are maybe 6 extra inches away from the people at the next table. So you might still want to deal with the behavior.

Also, very introverted so am not interested in spending time with people I share nothing in common with.

We are all on a cruise. Boom, that's something you have in common! What fun activities did you do today? Ooh that sounds like fun. (While mentally adding it to your yep or nope list for the next cruise) etc

We're not requesting anything but as a family of 5 with three kids under 5 I bet they won't inflict us on anyone.

As a family of 3 we were put with a family of 5. One of our fave experiences. They even matched the kids ages so that their two flanked my guy in age. The three of them had a blast. We're vegetarian and their kids were eating all the meat; who cares? Three boys laughing their heads off about who knows what, while I learned from the dad what being a train engineer was like, and hubby talked with mom and grandma. Awesome.

For me, it's simple. We are THAT family. You know, the ones that bicker and order stuff without the onions or extra bread. And my teens kick each other under the table, even though we don't let them sit across from each other. I'm not a bad parent, I just have kids who like to challenge. Anyway, pair that with me, who stresses about disrupting others and it would make our meals miserable, as well as the other family's.

Same answer as earlier. Tables are close.

And honestly if you sat with others and the teens had the utter embarrassment of accidentally kicking an unrelated tablemate I bet it would clear up that naughtiness like no amount of discipline coukd ever do. Just put them so my burly hubby is in the line of fire, not my frail mother in law.



And as an introvert, what's small talk? Get to the good but non-controversial stuff. What's your job like? What is your state like? What is there to do? How was that dolphin swim (even if you would ever ever swim with dolphins ever)?

Then again, on the cruise I mentioned with the two boys from the ther family, they all made a bathroom trip with their dad, my son went along, and in that 10 minute trip the boys started talking about their religions, asking incredibly good and respectful questions, and getting more world knowledge. The adults all joked that we could never have broached that subject gracefully, but the boys just got down to it. Pretty neat.

 

[Charlies_Mommy]

suspect this is highly personal and changeable. Normally, I would be 'ok' with sharing, but being a family of introverts it would NOT be my preference. As someone said above, I don't want to be forced to hold conversations with people I don't know during meal time. I am not cruising to meet life-long friends. I am cruising to enjoy MY family. Also, for us, this next trip is very special to us and we as a family need time to digest our prior year and reconnect as a family. We can't do that during mealtime if we are with others.

 

[LCoulter]

DH and I are very shy and it would stress us out to socialize with strangers at dinner. Quickly we would dread dinner and just not go. We would rather enjoy dinner and talk to each other and our DD. I do miss when we traveled with my parents and brother's family....we had great times together at dinner on cruises.

 

[twinsouvenirs]

Things I wish I could request in good conscience:
1) Tablemates with accents. Especially British or Aussie. I just like listening to them talk. Texas might work too. And any place with idioms that don't match ours.
2) Celebrity tablemates.
3) Horrible people. The kind that would say things that would allow my husband and I to compete to see who could keep our faces straight the longest before breaking, and then give us plenty of fodder for funny stories later.
4) People with totally unconventional jobs. Not corporate.... like a zoological vet and an iceberg researcher or something. Unfortunately, they'd probably be bored by us.
5) People that fight spectacularly with lots of personal information, and/or ask us for advice on extremely convoluted scenarios. I love other people's drama.
6) A friend for my introverted husband. Someone who would be like "dude. We need to ditch these ladies and go to the pub." Please... ditch me... (I'll console myself with a book and a glass of wine overlooking the ocean )
7) Super perfect kids that would show our children perfect behavior that our kids would pay attention to.

finally... and more reasonably... a nice table of three that would include a 3 year old boy or girl that would totally click with my youngest and play with him all week in the kids clubs so he wouldn't always feel like a tag-along with his older twin sisters Ideally with accents of course.

 

[lizabu]

For me, it's simple. We are THAT family. You know, the ones that bicker and order stuff without the onions or extra bread. And my teens kick each other under the table, even though we don't let them sit across from each other. I'm not a bad parent, I just have kids who like to challenge. Anyway, pair that with me, who stresses about disrupting others and it would make our meals miserable, as well as the other family's. Then, I'd come here after the cruise, and that thread with all the horrible tablemate stories would be resurrected and we'd be the ones they'd be talking about... then I'd have to leave this great board out of embarrassment and I'd have those events and words swirling in my head for many years to come as epic failures... might never go on a cruise again for the same reason.

So, no tablemates, please. And yes, we tipped extra.

This rings so true for me. We took my teens on our first cruise and we shared with another family. Their daughter was so sweet and outgoing and trying to spark a friendship. My daughters acted surly, refused to go to the kids club, talked about embarrassing subjects and more. It was exhausting. Every night I wanted to crawl under the table.

 

[Aanna]

Talking to others when it is not my choice is work. In my job, I need to keep clients and volunteers happy and motivated. That often means hiding my thoughts and needs for the greater good. Day after day after day.

I've read a lot about people who refuse to put on a "show" of wearing dressy clothes while on vacation because it is *their vacation. To *me, vacation means not putting on a show of sociability: the freedom to be silent, to not have to plaster on a fake smile to make table-mates comfortable, to not have to be "on," to discuss things that are near and dear to my heart with my loved ones and not worry whether I am excluding people at my table or over-revealing my mind. I just want to be able to relax and be myself.

I would much rather have a choice of who I want to interact with when: you'll know I'm smiling and talking to you because it's genuine interest and not something required by the circumstances. There are plenty of chances to meet other folks without being assigned "friends."

Edited to add: This is coming from a place of great exhaustion, where this introvert has had to spend WAY too much time playing the chipper extrovert. I *so* need this vacation!!

 

[Pens Fan]

We have never sailed in concierge, but I've read on here that Disney automatically assigns concierge guests their own table in the MDR's unless they specifically request otherwise. If that's really the case, then it seems that Disney feels that having your own table is preferred by most. Otherwise why offer it as a perk for concierge guests???

 

[RedSox68]

Talking to others when it is not my choice is work. In my job, I need to keep clients and volunteers happy and motivated. That often means hiding my thoughts and needs for the greater good. Day after day after day.

I've read a lot about people who refuse to put on a "show" of wearing dressy clothes while on vacation because it is *their vacation. To *me, vacation means not putting on a show of sociability: the freedom to be silent, to not have to plaster on a fake smile to make table-mates comfortable, to not have to be "on," to discuss things that are near and dear to my heart with my loved ones and not worry whether I am excluding people at my table or over-revealing my mind. I just want to be able to relax and be myself.

I would much rather have a choice of who I want to interact with when: you'll know I'm smiling and talking to you because it's genuine interest and not something required by the circumstances. There are plenty of chances to meet other folks without being assigned "friends."

Edited to add: This is coming from a place of great exhaustion, where this introvert has had to spend WAY too much time playing the chipper extrovert. I *so* need this vacation!!

Very well said!

We are all on a cruise. Boom, that's something you have in common! What fun activities did you do today? Ooh that sounds like fun. (While mentally adding it to your yep or nope list for the next cruise) etc

I personally don't like being forced to socialize -- and I am not the least bit interested with putting on a phony front to interact with tablemates. I work as a public servant and do this 8 hours a day five days a week and it is tiring. When I cruise, I want it to just be my family and I with no intrusions. We have plenty of conversations around the ship and interact plenty throughout the cruise and on excursions and do enjoy that - but at dinner, I want down time and time to unwind with my family. It's a very personal choice but it's my cruise and that's what we choose

 

[Cackyschmackers]

I so agree with so many above posters about why family time is so precious and it certainly is fleeting. I sadly cannot even tell you when the last time our family of five sat down all together for an actual meal, between work, sports, friends, travel, commitments, etc. As others said, we're paying top dollar for a family vacation, which for us includes time as a family to connect at the end of the day, feel safe and comfortable, and make even more wonderful memories. My girls actually asked yesterday if we will have our own table on the cruise, bc they feel stress too about not being able to "be themselves" bc one is very shy and another has some issues I won't get into here. In addition, yesterday, my husband came home exhausted from work telling me how he went from meeting to meeting and was mentally sapped and "talked out". Not everyone is naturally outgoing and comfortable around strangers, and peoples' differences can be magnified in artificial or forced settings. For example, when we ate at Biergaarten at WDW a few months ago, I mentioned to my girls we'd be seated with another family bc of the fun, family-style seating. At lunch, they suddenly turned into clams, and my husband had to put on his, "I'm the fun, people-pleasing guy who's forced to carry the conversation when it falls flat" hat. So what happened is that he ended up talking only to our table mates, not to me or the kids, which I resented, and he got annoyed when the kids wouldn't chit chat. Awkward all around. We meet plenty of new and interesting people in our every day go, go, go lives, and on the cruise, too, on our excursions, around the ship, at the pools, etc. Dinner for us is family time. Table of 5, please!