Do you take pictures of the deceased laying in the coffin?

[safetymom]

Curious about this. Does it bother you?

 

[WaltD4Me]

I've never done it and never would, I prefer to remember the person in life, but I know people who have done it and have seen it done. It doesn't bother me if someone wants to do that, but I wouldn't do it myself.

 

[sayhello]

I've never done it and never would, I prefer to remember the person in life, but I know people who have done it and have seen it done. It doesn't bother me if someone wants to do that, but I wouldn't do it myself.

This. I just can't imagine, no matter how good a job the Mortuary did, wanting a picture of someone with no life in them... But I'm sure some people need that for whatever their personal reason, and they should be able to do whatever they need to.

Sayhello

 

[TinkerChelle]

Wow! Honestly, I must live in a bubble or something....I had never heard of this. I would never do be able to do that.....IMHO once they pass they are already moved on....and I wouldn't want to remember someone I loved in that way.

 

[roomthreeseventeen]

No. It seems disrespectful to me, and you never know where the heck the pictures would end up.

 

[Disney Dad Canada]

In the Victorian Era is was common to take Momento Mori, that would be pictures of the dead, either immediately after, or soon after, the death of a loved one. This practice was especially used with young children, and, if one googles momento mori, the images you will see are very frequently young children.

This tradition still does carry one. It is not uncommon for there to be an image of the deceased sitting a top their casket. Usually this is a picture taken in life, however the general effect is the same. It's a little momento of the dead.

Taking a picure of the corpse itself could be significant to others in ways one cannot understand themselves. Some people will take a picture of the dead in their casket to remind themselves how beautiful the funeral was. They may also do so out of tradtiion.

http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/710308

 

[Disney Khi]

I've never done it and never would, I prefer to remember the person in life, but I know people who have done it and have seen it done. It doesn't bother me if someone wants to do that, but I wouldn't do it myself.

This is how I feel, too. Not something I would do, but I don't care if someone else does it.

 

[cathie1327]

I also don't have a problem with it. While I know it's not common, I know it does happen, and I think it's almost always a very personal reason, and I am respectful of that person's need to do so.

When my grandpa passed away, my cousin came from Washington to Colorado for the funeral. Her husband, however, could not, as he was in Afghanistan at the time. Her family was very close to my grandpa, and so my cousin took some pictures so that her husband could have some closure as well.

 

[CDolacki2003]

I have not, but I have read books on this topic. If you look into American Western history there are lots of photos of gunmen (like Jesse James) in thier caskets, usually propped up in front of the morticians store. There is even one photo taken in New York and it shows President Lincoln's body laying in state.

 

[safetymom]

If it was your loved one would you feel differently?

 

[lugnut33]

You can do whatever you like as the person in the casket will not care. The living people might care, but not the dead one.

 

[Cherinva]

My mother passed away a couple of years after we left NJ and moved to VA....when I was 15....At her services, there was a number of her friends that were taking pictures...it bothered me and I questioned why they were doing that...it was explained to me that it was southern thing and it was tradition...I had never heard of this before...I wouldn't do it.

 

[smb6]

NO!

And it is not a southern thing, I live in GA and I have never seen it done...... Sounds super wierd to me.

 

[girlrea]

I have pictures of all my relatives.( My Parents,Grandparents, brother, Aunts, Uncles, Neices.) They are in a photo album. We do it regularly in Va.

 

[Chuck S]

It seems more common in some families and localities. I have taken photos of flower arrangements and closed caskets for out of state relatives that could not make it to a service. I have not taken an actual photo of the deceased. But I have known some of our relatives that did take photos of the deceased. It doesn't bother me, if it brings comfort to the family to have such a photo.

I have also taken a photo of urns surrounded by flowers, as many in our family opt for creamation, but still have a nice, fairly traditional, memorial service.

 

[LilGMom]

I live in the south and have attended funerals when pictures were taken, by the family, and funerals when there was no picture taken. I feel that if it is your loved one then do as you wish. If it is a family member that wasn't immediately related to me or not part of my daily life than I think I'd feel better asking the super immediate family if they had a problem with a picture being taken. If it is just a friend I guess it would depend on the relationship with the immediate family and if they minded.

Would I take a picture at a funeral? No. But I also tend to sit at the back and not go up to the casket either since I don't care to have my last visual memory of a person be one of them in a casket no longer living. Yet another reason why I want to be cremated.

 

[parrotheadlois]

If it was your loved one would you feel differently?

Kathy, if you mean that someone was taking pictures of your loved one, then it would be totally inappropriate. It's not something I would do, but if someone wanted to take pictures of their own loved one, well, that would be their choice. I don't see anything wrong with it, especially for the reasons others pointed out (family members who can't be there, etc.). Years (and years and years) ago, when my grandmother died, my uncle was in the service. My other uncle took pictures of all the flowers so he could see them, I never saw a picture of her in the casket though.

 

[DisneyNutMary]

Personally, I find it spooky. I would rather look at pictures of a person in life than post mortem. It seems like something that should be reserved for medical examiners and crime scene photographers.

That said, I have seen it done. When my sister in law died, my brother in law flew across the country to be there for her funeral, but his wife could not make it. She asked that he take pictures of his sister in her casket- I think it was as another poster said- for closure. They had not seen her in a few years due to his military assignments, and never got a chance to see her one last time or say goodbye when she was ill.
Knowing my brother in law, I am sure those photos no longer exist, I am sure he destroyed them after his wife saw them.

 

[DisneyNutMary]

Oops, double post, sorry

 

[daneenm]

Kathy, I have seen it done and have no issue with it. It is not my famiiy's tradition, but then neither is an open casket.

I say do what makes you feel good. As long as your family is good with it, no one else's opinion matters. During a time of grief, it is no one else's business but the family's how they choose to mourn and remember.