Toddler Harness-To leash or not to leash

[eve1224]

To each their own and when we go in August my 2 yr and 3 yr olds will both have the harnesses. This is our first trip to the World. It really doesnt matter to me if I get looks or comments because I am doing what I feel is safe for my children. We will see how the first few days go and then if I feel that they will be ok without the harness then we will take them off but otherwise they will be on.

Amanda
DH Pedro
DD 9
DD 3
DD 2

 

[arlsdimples]

I can't believe I read this entire thread. I have three children ages 15, 10 and 15 months. My 15 year old never used a harness/leash although I never thought about it to be honest. My 10 year old DS OH YES we used it with him in WDW and other crowded places. I never noticed anything but positive remark or I chose to be oblivious to those ignorant enough to judge. (which BTW is not the same as someone who just chooses to not use one themselves, as some may not use it but are not overly preoccupied with others who do) I can assure you that when we go back to the World in a few months my then 18 month old will have one available to use if we choose. I will not care what others who choose a different method think as I do not care about their choices. I most certainly will not care at all what a know it all parent who is judgmental of everyone not like them thinks or says.

For what it's worth I had a very strong minded grandmother who from everything I gathered was very stern and firm with her children. I heard her on more than one occasion talk about how she would tie a rope onto my father and uncle when out with them back in the 30's. She would have given anyone who tried to criticize her a serious piece of her mind also. She did it because they were very active little boys. She did it to TEACH them to stay close to her.

Another little antidote....my father God rest his soul, always had funny remarks/observations about people in general. One does not apply here but was "People who do not have children have no idea what real stress is". Does not apply but is funny. The other one which I love was, "Those parents who only have one child who happens to be well behaved actually believe the reason they turned out that way is because they are amazing superior parents."

During one very moving conversion with my dad he also admitted that as a parent he made mistakes and I was certainly going to make mistakes as well but all you can do is make what you feel is the best choice at the time.

 

[tyzzle]

I'm sure you mean well, but you really don't know what you are talking about. I'm pretty sure most people don't use harnesses so they don't have to watch their kids.

Yes they do, all the time. Not most but many, and I don't care if someone uses a leash.

 

[Suz333]

When those leash things 1st become popular I thought "omg, how horrible!", but I don't think that way anymore. I think it does give an active toddler more freedom than being strapped down in a stroller the whole time (I"m not saying a stroller is bad - but some kids like to move more.)

A shorter lead definitely seems like a safer option than a long one that can clothesline others.

I don't have kids, and I own my own faults - being judgemental is one of them. So here it is - parents: please HYDRATE your children. If your child is thirsty, get them a drink. I'm not saying give in to your child's every whim & buy them the fancy drink or the giant soda or whatever. But, if you don't bring your own water into the park, and don't like the taste of the water from the water fountains (it is pretty gross), then be prepared to shell out the, what, 3 bucks, a few times a day for your kid. Please budget for this.

Lately it seems I see a lot of hot, miserable looking kids when I'm in the parks, and I wonder why nobody bought the 20 oz Disani bottle. It's what, 3 or 4 dollars. Yes, it's expensive. But, you can buy one, and then refill from the water fountain if you can stand the taste (or get a free ice water from the QS places or stands that have fountain drinks.) Budgeting for tix but not to keep kids safely hydrated is a strange choice in my view.

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

My son was a runner. Oh how I wish they had those backpack leashes when he was young. I would've used it.

 

[Mom2six]

Yes they do, all the time. Not most but many, and I don't care if someone uses a leash.

Those are the same people who don't watch their children when they are not using a harness. Being on a harness doesn't mean your small child doesn't need to be watched. Just from the top of my head, what would prevent him or her from picking up small (but to them interesting) pieces of garbage, or stones, or the lost backs of pins, or whatever and putting it into his or her mouth/swallowing it? Or their shoes from untying and tripping them? Or prevent them from stepping into the path of an uncoming vehicle? Little kids need to be watched for more reasons than running away...using a harness doesn't change people's parenting style.

 

[DisneyDizzy]

When I mentioned we were headed to WDW to our pediatrician the first thing she said was "Get a leash. For her safety and your sanity." Then she went on about keeping her hydrated and happy. I bought one but we didn't need it last year. I wouldn't have felt bad if I would have needed to use it.

 

[AllieV]

I have a runner who is also hyperactive and when surrounded by too much stimuli, literally starts to climb walls (or fences or trees or people). I had an elmo harness (where elmo was around front like a stuffed animal he could hug and it velcroed close in the back with a short handle attached) but the velcro was too weak and he'd pull right out of it. So I bought two tethers, a wrist one (which I knot on his belt loop instead because he'd pull so hard his arm would turn purple) and a clip on (for a belt loop). He's ripped a few belt loops already, but he's learned. He's 4 now. Now all I have to do is keep it with me and threaten to put it on. He hates the tether so much that he'd rather stay with me.

I fully expected Disney to be a total nightmare, but it was brand new to him, so he never wandered away from me. He did have several meltdowns and refused to move, but he never ran away.

I've gotten looks, but mostly out of curiosity. No one has ever said anything to me. I have NO problem ignoring ignorant people. It is not their responsibility to keep my kid safe; it is mine.

p.s. I read a few more comments here from people who seem to think this is a bad parenting issue. Uh, no. Read some psychology mags or just talk to any doctor. Not every kid's brain works the same. Some children are impulsive by chemical makeup, not bad parenting skills. Sheesh.

 

[Ninnygunk]

It's just a judgement call. I see absolutely nothing wrong with using one. I took one with me when my son was 2 1/2 but he stayed in the stroller most of the time while not on rides. I'd much rather know that my child is safe than worry about what anyone else may think.

 

[*Seanaci*]

We used a harness for my son until he was almost 3 for those times he didn't want to ride in the stroller. We used one for him at Disney back in 2008 when he was 14 months old. I never heard negative comments, nor saw people giving me dirty looks. But, if I had, I would have piped up with "it's my kid...and I'm not chasing after him in these crowds".

 

[dontthrowsand]

I was good about staying with my dad. We had a buddy system and I thought it was awesome he took time off his busy work life to take me to Disney. That being said, my parents probably would have used the wrist strap thing if they knew about it when i was that young. When I was about 5, I usually would just hold my dad's hand or get a piggy back ride. I didn't like to be away from my parents.

My brother on the other hand would run. Mom had a Velcro strap that went around his wrist and her's. He used it to pull her where he wanted to go. This was back in the early 90s, people werent very judgmental and most asked my mom where she got the thing.

If I have kids, totally going to use a harness, leash, ect. if it means they stay safe. I am a huge fan of parents willing to do that and am always happy to give positive comments if I hear someone give a negative one

 

[MinaFemme]

I just went and purchased the Eddie Bauer puppy 2 in 1 harness after reading this thread. Truth be told, I hadn't even thought to get one until now, but it's a great idea. My son will just be turning two on our trip, and he's not ready to be able to walk around unrestricted in the middle the crowds in WDW all day long just yet. When it comes to walking and holding my hand now, he's not so great about it yet. He wants his freedom, so this will help me to let him stretch his legs and walk around, without him throwing a fit because he doesn't want to hold my hand. Like someone wrote, it's just a tool. I will not have him in it on a daily basis, everywhere we go, but it will definitely be beneficial during our trip if we need it. It just may save our sanity and his!

I don't feel people should judge parents who choose to use them, unless it is done in a truly abusive manner (like tied to a pole for goodness sake! LOL). All children are different, and have vastly different personalities and needs. If a parent thinks it will help keep their children safe, how can that be wrong? Special needs in children are not always visible to an outsider, so please think twice before judging someone.

 

[scrappinginontario]

For me it's all about my dd's safety. I took a harness last August and even though we only used it once, it was worth it's weight in gold! My active DD was tired of sitting in the stroller (couldn't blame her!) and yet holding my hand in the hot August sun was very restrictive too. When I'd let go sometimes she would run a few feet away. Not far but out of arms reach To her it was a game. To mommy - not so much! I put her 'pink puppy' on her and we both had a much better time and I felt the stress lift from my shoulders.

I would never have thought I'd use a harness with my child until I was blessed with a 'busy' child. She's not bad - she's busy!! And the great part about her awesome personality is that my tall 3 1/2 yo is excited to ride Splash Mountain, the Great Goofini, Soarin' and more this summer! I love her personality and wouldn't change a bit of it. I just work with it and for us that means a harness at times and I make no apologies for it!!

 

[littlebit0863]

I WISH the harness would have worked for me. I have a little boy who was a runner, and at the time he decided he would become a runner, I was about 7 mos pregnant, with extremely swollen legs and feet, and could barely hobble, much less run at his speed. I bought the monkey harness, but he hated it. The worst was when we were at the library in the children's section, where there are no strollers allowed. We had his harness, and he decided he was going to take off out of the kids section. I hobbled after him, pulling on his lead, and he screamed "LET GO OF MY MONKEY TAIL!" I was embarrassed beyond belief, and I got looks and mutters. My kid then did that weightless/boneless thing that kids can do, and I swear I couldn't pick him up. Trying to drag a kid on a leash who has decided he will not move unless he is dragged is probably tops on my embarrassing things that have happened list. Finally one kindly woman carried him out for me, as I was in tears at that time. I still avoid that library. There was no easy answer for me, I just had to avoid places where we couldn't have the stroller until he outgrew it, which took about a year. Anyway, OP, I sympathize with you. It's hard not to care what other people think. I say if your kid will wear the leash, then get the leash. I envy you.