I am glad to know that everyone with 12 year old boys seem to be in the same situation with the video games. It is a daily battle here that the ds &/or ipod do NOT go to school....still not sure why they are allowed at lunch, but they are & the kids get no recess. It is not the "norm" for our area, but not much about our school district is. I am the "meanie" who says no video games during school week & limits time on weekends too. I am going to implement the 2pm Sunday rule; I will be popular this weekend.
DS12 is my oldest, so flying blind. Another question about grades, if you don't mind. When you look at grade for class, is it solely number or does nature of assignment matter? This semester lowest grade in 2 classes, really pulling overall grade down is a "coloring/drawing" project part. All of the written examples are correct, but coloring/drawing doesn't look like what it should. So test is 100, coloring project 80 makes average 90.
I appreciate all the advice & guidance. You all seem to be on top of things with your kids. I do not find that to be true in my "real" life. I have been told "I cannot, & frankly do not want to even try, to keep track of what my kids do online. Between the itouch, iphone, ipad & computer it would be too much." Somedays I feel like I am crazy, but I do not want to end up blindsided by trouble. There is way too much out there, kwim? Thanks in advance & sorry for long post. I got carried away, but editted out a ton! LOL!
I can pretty much second everything Nancy said. I don't pay for grades, we also have a sink or swim policy in the house, however if you sink I take away all entertainment. For DS11 his DSi, TV, and basketball are his currency. For DS12 Drama club was his currency, for DS16 it's his phone.
As for grades, if they lost 10 points for coloring I don't care, if they lose 10 points for grammar and spelling we have an issue. I care about the meat and bones of a paper, assignment, project. Personally I think coloring is stupid beyond 4th grade. About the only thing I care about for coloring is mapping, but you'd better know where Tennessee is before you worry about what color it is.
I will tell you I am not popular with the boys friends because I am a mom, not a friend. My kids know and have known from day 1. I will snoop in your room, I read texts, I check browser history. I pay for that crap, it's my house, it's my rules. I note times the kids are on the computer and I will check the history. If it's been deleted DH will do a forensic sweep of my laptop and find what you hid.
I will walk up to DS16 and put my hand out, and he knows give mom the phone right now.
Who told you you can't know what they are doing online?? Sure as hell better not be your kids. My money paid for those devices, I can make them disappear. You don't "need" an iPad, phone or computer. Hell, DS16 just got internet access and the camera on his phone 2 months ago. I shut all that crap off and put an admin password on his phone. I also pay $5 a month at ATT to have smart limits on DS's phone. I limit how many texts he can send a month. yeah, we have unlimited texting but it's about learning self control.
lemme go dig something up for you I found on Pinterest.