Nasty School Letter

[finnster77]

In no way, shape, or form do I see making decisions for my children as a revokable privilige. I feel it is my RIGHT and my RESPONSIBILITY as their parent to make the best decisions for them and our family.

I agree it is your responsibility but certainly NOT your right. If you're not providing your child's basic needs, it will be revoked. I've seen it happen.
I'm sure that you are a great parent. This protection is provided to kids who have the not-so-great parents.

 

[Barbers2005]

Parents need to understand that making decisons for their children is a revokable privilige.

I have to disagree with you on this one. Parenting my children is my right, not a privilege. Yes, your rights as a parent can be taken away if you break certain laws, but so can your right to life and liberty, your right to bear arms, and your right to free speech. Just because it can be taken away doesn't mean it isn't a right.

 

[finnster77]

I have to disagree with you on this one. Parenting my children is my right, not a privilege. Yes, your rights as a parent can be taken away if you break certain laws, but so can your right to life and liberty, your right to bear arms, and your right to free speech. Just because it can be taken away doesn't mean it isn't a right.

Semantics aside, I think we're on the same page.

 

[Barbers2005]

Sort of. I would be seriously upset if the school district started telling me when I can take my family on vacation. A missed week of school is simply not in the same league as parents who neglect or abuse their children and it is wrong for schools to treat parents as if they are bad for wanting to take their children out for vacation. Luckily this is not a problem in my area, but if I was given a hard time about taking my child out of school, I would absolutely be doing something about it (voting for someone who more closely reflects my beliefs, speaking up at school board meetings).

 

[write2caro]

Sort of. I would be seriously upset if the school district started telling me when I can take my family on vacation. A missed week of school is simply not in the same league as parents who neglect or abuse their children and it is wrong for schools to treat parents as if they are bad for wanting to take their children out for vacation. Luckily this is not a problem in my area, but if I was given a hard time about taking my child out of school, I would absolutely be doing something about it (voting for someone who more closely reflects my beliefs, speaking up at school board meetings).

 

[labst60]

Sort of. I would be seriously upset if the school district started telling me when I can take my family on vacation. A missed week of school is simply not in the same league as parents who neglect or abuse their children and it is wrong for schools to treat parents as if they are bad for wanting to take their children out for vacation. Luckily this is not a problem in my area, but if I was given a hard time about taking my child out of school, I would absolutely be doing something about it (voting for someone who more closely reflects my beliefs, speaking up at school board meetings).

EXACTLY and just to reiterate - just because something CAN be revoked in extreme circumstances doesn't make it privilege.

 

[Jenna45]

After reading through this thread I feel blessed to live where I do. While the schools do not encourage us to pull our children out of school, they permit it. They only request a note in writing 3 weeks prior to the vacation so the teachers have ample time to get work together for the child. ( this is middle school) we do vacation yearly with my parents in October , it is the only time we can all go as a family and will continue to do so until DS is in High School.

With that said, the one thing I really felt shocked about in reading this thread, is the parents whom are being singled out here are the one's who are clearly involved, it's alot different to take your child out of school for a week on vacation because that is when you can do it to spend time with your chiild , request missed work etc, then to let your child miss school because they missed the bus or they just don't feel like it.

On a side note: No,matter what one does, you can't prevent a child from getting sick, if kids washed there hands, and did not share drinks or touch everyone and everything, if we as parents did not send our sick kids to school because we can't miss work so that they can infect others and so the cycle goes... My son won't even tell me when he doesn't feel well, I have to try and figure it out from his behavior, or sometimes I would never even know... To imply that a parent should be singled out or punished for keeping a sick child home is ludacris...

Ok, I have said my piece. I feel for the parents who are in this situation and for the teachers and admin's as well. While being a parent is a tiring a job, teaching is something I know I could not do, nor would I care too.. I am more than happy to see my son off every morning and I can't wait to see his friends go after a playdate

 

[chobie]

The schools cannot cater to every individual student and their parents whims. At some point they have to have rules that apply to everyone and that are in the best interests of everyone. Attendence policies make sense. It is disruptive to the student, the teacher and the class to have a student miss a big chunk of time.

 

[write2caro]

it's alot different to take your child out of school for a week on vacation because that is when you can do it to spend time with your chiild , request missed work etc, then to let your child miss school because they missed the bus or they just don't feel like it.

I don't remember anyone saying they did it because their child 'just didn't feel like" going to school. I think it was parents using their judgment with their kids and making exceptions here and there to spend time with them, be it a week in WDW the way you choose to do it or a day at home under certain circumstances the way someone else might choose to do it.

 

[write2caro]

All I can say is thanks to the OP from way back when, because I am now going to do A LOT of research I didn't know I needed to into the school districts we are considering sending our kids when they are of school age. I am so surprised at how something seemingly reasonable like an attendance policy can go this far off the deep end. I really wish those who pass laws like NCLB, etc. would study other countries that are clearly superior in elementary and high school education. IMHO it would make the jobs of teachers and administrators as well as the students and parents much more pleasant.

 

[finnster77]

It seems to me that most parents agree that the schools should have attendance policies and regulations to protect all children, but there are many who will balk when those regulations are applied to them. They seem to think that each should be examined on a case by case basis. It would be great if we could do that, but we start down a slippery slope when we say it's OK for parent "A" to pull their child out of school for week, but parent "B" cannot.

 

[chobie]

It seems to me that most parents agree that the schools should have attendance policies and regulations to protect all children, but there are many who will balk when those regulations are applied to them. They seem to think that each should be examined on a case by case basis. It would be great if we could do that, but we start down a slippery slope when we say it's OK for parent "A" to pull their child out of school for week, but parent "B" cannot.

Exactly. What if a poor single mom who can't afford to go to WDW decides to take a 2 week vacation from the stress of getting the kids to school in the morning and wants to just let them lay around the house all day and watch tv as a "vacation?" (Some of the tv watching would be educational PBS stuff). Would everyone here be all right with that?

 

[hsmamato2]

Exactly. What if a poor single mom who can't afford to go to WDW decides to take a 2 week vacation from the stress of getting the kids to school in the morning and wants to just let them lay around the house all day and watch tv as a "vacation?" (Some of the tv watching would be educational PBS stuff). Would everyone here be all right with that?

Yep- I'd be just fine with that,even if the kids didn't watch even one 'educational' tv show...... like some pp's have mentioned,just b/c parental rights can be revoked in extreme circumstances,does not make them a 'privilege'- our children do not belong the state or federal government,they belong to families.
Yes, families enrolled in schools with their various requirements(and all of them are different,so who's to say whose is best?) should live up to their 'end of the contract' and work with the rules, those kids still belong to the FAMILIES -not the system.

 

[write2caro]

Exactly. What if a poor single mom who can't afford to go to WDW decides to take a 2 week vacation from the stress of getting the kids to school in the morning and wants to just let them lay around the house all day and watch tv as a "vacation?" (Some of the tv watching would be educational PBS stuff). Would everyone here be all right with that?

Yup. I think she should be able to spend the time with her kids just as those who can afford the trip. My personal opinion is that she should do her best to get school work ahead of time for them and make sure they do it before they go back to minimize disruption. I think the key word in the real world is MINIMIZE not PREVENT disruption. Let's be serious. As important as school obviously is, family time is important, too. Whether it be at home or in WDW, a parent should be able to choose when/how to spend some special time with their kids without worrying about being hauled into court.

The notion that parenting my kids is a privilege that can be revoked by a school because of a vacation seems absolutely ludicrous. My husband didn't even believe me when I first told him about some of the stuff in this thread! A week in WDW (or on the couch for that matter) is not exactly child abuse. I think maybe some perspective on this issue is in order.

 

[lunabkat]

If that's what she considers a vacation, why not? You only rate a vacation if you can afford to go away somewhere? Single mothers don't deserve a break because they can't afford to take the kids to Disney, or France, or the moon?

School is important, but not the totality of life for kids. I don't care what anyone says, I am the parent and I decide when I will pull them out of school for something. I don't take a week a month or even every year, it is far more important to live life's experiences than tow(toe?)the line your entire life. Sorry but I don't see why "living large" once in a while with the kids has to be a "federal case".

You gotta shake it up once in a while and live life while you've got it. I took my 12 year old daughter out of school for a week in 1996 for the best vacation of our lives, 6 mos. later she was killed in an accident. I thank God everyday that we got to live that vacation together and anyone who lets the "powers that be" rattle their cage should think this over very carefully. You don't always have as much time as you think you do so try and enjoy what you've got while you've got it.

I doubt if anyone ever looks back and says "Gee, ya know, I really wish we hadn't taken the kids out of school for a week for vacation. Those wonderful memories are a real waste of space. Who needs to destress and relax anyway?"

 

[jenwolgey]

If that's what she considers a vacation, why not? You only rate a vacation if you can afford to go away somewhere? Single mothers don't deserve a break because they can't afford to take the kids to Disney, or France, or the moon?

School is important, but not the totality of life for kids. I don't care what anyone says, I am the parent and I decide when I will pull them out of school for something. I don't take a week a month or even every year, it is far more important to live life's experiences than tow(toe?)the line your entire life. Sorry but I don't see why "living large" once in a while with the kids has to be a "federal case".

You gotta shake it up once in a while and live life while you've got it. I took my 12 year old daughter out of school for a week in 1996 for the best vacation of our lives, 6 mos. later she was killed in an accident. I thank God everyday that we got to live that vacation together and anyone who lets the "powers that be" rattle their cage should think this over very carefully. You don't always have as much time as you think you do so try and enjoy what you've got while you've got it.

I doubt if anyone ever looks back and says "Gee, ya know, I really wish we hadn't taken the kids out of school for a week for vacation. Those wonderful memories are a real waste of space. Who needs to destress and relax anyway?"

Very well said!!! So glad you got that time with your daughter.

 

[finnster77]

The notion that parenting my kids is a privilege that can be revoked by a school because of a vacation seems absolutely ludicrous.

I believe you're still missing the point. The school can't "revoke" anything. They simply set the regulations. They would then report offenders to social services. That being said, these rules aren't established to punish parents who take their kids to Disney. But sometimes, in stricter school districts, these parents are caught in squeeze when the school has to enforce their rules because of the deadbeat parents.

My suggestion:

Don't put your school in a difficult position and back them into a corner. Simply state that your children will not be in school for next five days or so for "personal reasons" or "family business".........trust me, they'll appreciate it. You put them in a bad spot when you officially announce your vacation intentions because the deadbeat parents want the same considerations.

One set of rules for all.

 

[finnster77]

A couple of open questions to all, especially those indignant at our public schools regarding this issue:


1. Should schools set attendance policies?

2. If so, should ALL have to follow them?

3. How would you word them to ensure that every good parent-student is excused for their family time, but the ones needing "guidance" are dealt with?

It's more difficult than you think.

 

[ntz4disney]

We are leaving in one week for our annual May vaction, we are away for 10 days and my daughter will be missing a total of 8 school days and her school has not ever had a problem with her not being there. We head away every December for 5-7 days and again our longer trip is in May and we have never heard any problems come from the school. I have been told by other parents that the only time the principal has issues with it is if its going to be longer then 2 full weeks out of school, we are 2 days shy of that one, or if the child has excessive absence during the school year already. My daughter has only missed 1 regular day this year and the rest are all Disney related. As a family we have been doing these trips for years and we will continue to do so until we get grief from the school district we live in. We also request that schoolwork be sent on each trip, her teachers require the work to be returned one week after she returns from vacation, afterall her teacher feels like the kids need a break too, so they can catch up on homework later! Mayeb someday I will have issues over this, but until then we will continue our May/December trips and send notes to inform the school what our plans are. We were even thinking of squeezing in a long weekend over Halloween next year ... guess we'll see what happens!

 

[mom0299]

As a parent who loves Disney (as does the rest of my family), and a teacher, I can see both sides of the issue. With my husband and I both working in education we don't have a choice but to take our trips during school breaks. It is possible to make those wonderful memories during the summer, spring break, Christmas break, and other school breaks during the year. We have done it several times and will continue to do it as long as our kids want to go to WDW. Just remember that when you ask your child's teacher for work ahead of time that isn't as easy as it sounds. Depending on the class they may move more quickly or more slowly and then your child will not have the correct work done when he/she returns. Also, worksheets and book work are not a substitute for your child's teacher. If it were that easy I'd say let the kids come by each morning, let us hand them their work, and send them home until the next day. Attendance policies are there for a reason. We have done research on student absences. As soon as a student misses 10 days their grades and scores on standardized tests drop dramatically. Those days do not have to be consecutive and they can be excused because of doctor visits or unexcused because of things like shopping and trips to Disney. It simply doesn't matter why they miss, just the fact that they miss. Schools do get a certain amount of money based on average daily attendance, but that is only half the story. Thanks to NCLB we are held accountable for every student enrolled in our school whether they are present or not. There are strict guidelines for attendance and a school can lose its AYP status for NCLB because of attendance. I agree that family time is extremely important, but I have found that we have excellent family vacations in the months of June, July, and December.