Nasty School Letter

[In a hurry]

So what? If a parent wants to take their older child and accept the consequences, then that should be their problem.

Our schools are always saying they want parental input, and involvement, but they want to give no power to the parents. It is assumed that they, the parents, are unable to make the "best" decision for their child. The schools aren't improving as theyincrease the hours and rules. The proof is in the pudding.

 

[Mister Incredible]

You have the right to do what ever you want as long as you are willing to accept the consequences. Just don't expect special treatment for your child. If your child fails for having too many unexcused absents, don't go back in front of the administration and say you know best. The policies are in place for a reason.

Of course if this child falls behind they will require more teacher time which takes time away from the student who didn't take 7 days off to see Mickey. It's a no win for the schools.

 

[In a hurry]

Exactly. I don't think the school should be catching "johnny" up either. That is part of the natural consequence. If my daughter misses school, it is my choice and I have to be responsible across the board. I believe giving parents back their responsibility is what is needed to make the changes people are asking of the educational system.

I do realize it won't happen, but that is my wish as a teacher and a parent.

 

[Mister Incredible]

I believe giving parents back their responsibility is what is needed to make the changes people are asking of the educational system.

I agree. However, the sad part is there are many, many parents out there who just don't give a rat's a#$. It's those parents that force an attendence policy. It all goes back to my original statement. If you let this go, you are setting a precedent that many will take advantage of and in the long run it will hurt the schools. I'm not judging this case, I'm just saying if the school doesn't stick to their policy, they are setting themselves up for a long battle.

FYI, I don't see a "private" school giving their blessing to an extended vacation for their students either.

 

[crisi]

From talking to friends that teach, in every year there are a few parents who make life difficult for the teacher AND drain resources from the other kids. These are the ones that take vacations and want the teacher to pre-prep work. Then they don't make sure their student does the work while gone. Then they get back and the student is behind and they call the teacher to demand special time be set aside to make sure their child's needs are addressed. When the teacher refuses to spend classroom time reteaching material to one student, they yell at the administration. Then the school board. All with yells of "my tax dollars pay your salary." They threaten to sue and in some cases do sue. My friends have unlisted numbers to avoid the phone calls of these parents - who want their kids to get As regardless of the quality of work or the effort put in and when they get a B (often for only marginally B level work) their parents contact them with "don't you realize this will affect my kid's ability to get into a top school!"

There are other difficult parents, too - the abusive ones, and the ones that don't care. But when it comes to the ones that my girlfriends gripe about, its overwhelmingly the ones that tend to interfere, who want the school to bend to their needs.

 

[jodifla]

From talking to friends that teach, in every year there are a few parents who make life difficult for the teacher AND drain resources from the other kids. These are the ones that take vacations and want the teacher to pre-prep work. Then they don't make sure their student does the work while gone. Then they get back and the student is behind and they call the teacher to demand special time be set aside to make sure their child's needs are addressed. When the teacher refuses to spend classroom time reteaching material to one student, they yell at the administration. Then the school board. All with yells of "my tax dollars pay your salary." They threaten to sue and in some cases do sue. My friends have unlisted numbers to avoid the phone calls of these parents - who want their kids to get As regardless of the quality of work or the effort put in and when they get a B (often for only marginally B level work) their parents contact them with "don't you realize this will affect my kid's ability to get into a top school!"

There are other difficult parents, too - the abusive ones, and the ones that don't care. But when it comes to the ones that my girlfriends gripe about, its overwhelmingly the ones that tend to interfere, who want the school to bend to their needs.

This feels like a bit of a tangent to me, though I see how it could be related. Honestly, all the OP wanted to do was take a vacation with her family. I don't think she wanted B's turned into A's, etc. etc.

Taking YOUR OWN kids out of school for a few days used to be your prerogative, at least it was while I was growing up. You didn't get the third degree from the school. As the parent, you wrote your note and it was done.
As long as you didn't keep your kid home all the time, it wasn't questioned.

 

[SqueakyMouse]

I just find it odd that Teachers (NOT ALL) take it to heart when you pull your child out of school to go on vacation. They have the entire summer off from their primary job that provides them with an OK salary, VERY good benefits and a pension while the rest of the work force doesn't get Weekends, Holidays, Snow Days and the summer off.

The world must be quite different where you live. I've lived in TX, VA, MD, FL, and MD. Teachers have been to school longer than most others in the local work force (personally, I hold a BA in Econ, a BS in education, an MAE in Ed Admin, and an MAE in Special ED...PLUS I'm working on my EdD in School Psych), are lower paid than even nurses (no offense intended here...I think you need to be paid WAAAAAY more, too), have minimal health insurance (plus pay a PREMIUM for their kids to be insured), work extremely long hours, and do NOT have long breaks as many uninformed parents assume (generally, teachers are in PD or college classes whenever they are off). To top this off, I have NEVER EVER in my many years in education (which I love despite the above mentioned negatives) heard a parent complain about taking their kids out of school for a trip. I will reiterate that these rules do NOT originate with teachers!!

 

[SqueakyMouse]

It wouldn't really matter. The school administrators are empowered by the school board, elected by the people to represent the public interest.

The problem is the system, not the people.

Wait! WHO did you say elected the school board????? I certainly hope you voted.

 

[mom2febgirls]

I was wondering about that -- is adopting homeschooling that simple (logistically/administratively)?

Yes it is. I have a friend who just did this last year. She took her kids to Italy for 3 weeks and she withdrew her kids (stating the plan to Homeschool) and then re enrolled them when she got back. She didn't do it because the school threatened her (they were also great when we took the kids to WDW last month) but to keep the school from being penalized due to NCLB so the administration made sure she had a smooth transition, but it is easy to do.

 

[cdrn1]

My "children" are 30, 27, and 24. When they were in school I took them out for 5-8 days per school year for family vacations. The school corporation didn't like it. At this point in their lives I don't see that it had any significant impact on their careers; they are successful and happy. They (and I) have very fond memories of the family time we enjoyed on those vacations. They are your children. You decide what to do with them!

 

[Camping Griswalds]

In many cases you can disarm this whole argument completely by offering to pay the school for the days your child misses.

In a lot of districts, some of the school's funding is tied directly to daily attendance; they lose X dollars for every child for every absent day, usually about $20-30 per child per day. If you offer to make up the lost funds, many schools suddenly become much more tolerant about the days off (provided you're not asking for extra favors otherwise, and if your child is a good student who will not fall seriously behind due to the absence.)

I find this absolutely appauling!!! My kids go to a private school, so in my opinion, the public school system has my, and many other private school parents taxes, to use in their budget! If everyone who has their children in private schools suddenly switched to public schools (as we are all entitled to) the public school system would be even more overcrowded. No Way should anyone be encouraged to give any more $$$ related to attendance or anything else!!!

 

[marcyinPA]

We can be taken to court and fined also, with possible jail time if our kids miss more than 15 days a year. i do remember this having something to do with the no child left behind act.

Kelly

In our district in PA, our kids can only miss 15 days TOTAL from grades one through five for "vacation purposes". The policy is more strict in middle and high school. I believe it's 5 days total from 6-8th and 5 days total from 9-12. (not certain on that one, my kids are only in 1st and 5th). And yes, it has everything to do with NCLB and the almighty dollar!

Anyway, this past September was our last time to travel during the school year since my 10 year old will be in middle school next year. It's not a matter of the policy for me, but more of a fear that he won't be able to catch up. Middle school has a much faster pace than elementary school.

I had to fill out a form to take my kids out of school in September. I had to put "educational benefit of the trip"....Although WDW has many, I opted for the "it's none of your business" route and simply stated that family time has many benefits.

It's funny that my kids teachers were all excited for them and kept telling me they wished they could go along. The principal, on the other hand, was cranky about it (because she just sees the $$ lost from attendance issues!).

 

[ellyn2000]

I've read several posts from NC and it's very different from county to county. There are 100 counties in NC and I think it varies in each one. My county has never given me a problem and I think it's an issue when a child misses 10 days.

 

[cara loves the poly]

My children go to Catholic school, our principal had us fill out a form explaining why we could not go during the summer, and all was fine!

 

[momimouse27]

Who do these school districts think they are?

I'd be willing to go to court to tell these schools what they can do with their policies.

It's all about the money...not the kids. And it's ludicrous considering you can homeschool your kids, and the state doesn't care if they EVER come to school.

I totally agree. Its really getting out of hand what the school system can get away with nowadays. I mean, they are your kids and if you want to take them on vacation for a whole month then that ought to be up to you as a parent. I guarantee it won't be the end of the world if a kid misses 1 week of school...

 

[cara loves the poly]

Bottom line, parents use their common sense, if their child is going to struggle because of missing a week, the parent won't do it. My children do wonderful in school, doesn't hurt them a bit. When they get into the higher grades, I will re-evaluate the situation as a responsible parent!

 

[cara loves the poly]

You may be the ultimate authority when it comes to your kids. However, the school is the authority when it comes time to grade them or pass them. And you are not really the ultimate authority - anyone who has spent anytime working with foster care kids whose parents have had their parental rights pulled knows that the state can and will intervene in how you raise your kids. You must, in most states, feed them, clothe them, send them to school between the ages of six and sixteen (or homeschool them according to your state law), not abuse them, not allow them to drink alcohol, maintain a level of discipline that keeps them out of juvy, etc. Not doing these things will cause the state to intervene.

I have no issue with people who pull their kids and are willing to face consequences. But the school has no obligation to pass your kid or give them As because you pulled them for two weeks - even if they do A level work on their tests. Attendance is often one of the factors to grading - it isn't just about passing tests and knowing the material.

We all make choices regarding our children. Some of us miss school for vacations. Others spend a lot of time, money and energy on school, often at the cost of family time. Some put so much emphasis on sports that both family time and school have to give. Some put more emphasis on their moral and religious foundation - spending a lot of time on church or community activities - it isn't school they wouldn't dream of missing for Disney, but church. All this is fine, but you can't expect the world adapt to your choices - when you choose one thing you give up another. If you want to end up with a pro hockey player, or a kid who gets a scholarship to MIT - these sacrifices may be worthwhile.

You are saying, a child whom scores higher scores on all of their tests in class, should be held back a year because they went to Disney for a week. You are -out there.

 

[Nancyg56]

I think that the orginial idea of excused/unexcused absences and the number you are allowed so that you can be promoted regardless of grades is a good idea. I do think it is geared towards those children who for whatever reason are not going to school. These kids get promoted year after year and then get into 10th grade with a 3rd grade education and quit.

Kelly[/QUOTE

I think that you are right. It is dangerous to assume that all parents regard education in the same manner. Not all parents are responsible and see that their kids attend classes regularly, and work with them to keep their grades up. Most parents are concientious, but there are many who are not, and therein lies a problem. Some schools have a difficult time getting children to come to school. In our capital city not even 75% of the children made it to school the first day. You can imagine what the rest of the year is like. I'm sure that school systems try to work with families, but I would not want the job of enforcing the law with one family, and allowing another family a different set of rules. So sad that laws needed to be created in the first place to ensure that parents get their kids to school, but this is the world that we live in now.

 

[Camping Griswalds]

I think that the orginial idea of excused/unexcused absences and the number you are allowed so that you can be promoted regardless of grades is a good idea. I do think it is geared towards those children who for whatever reason are not going to school. These kids get promoted year after year and then get into 10th grade with a 3rd grade education and quit.

Kelly[/QUOTE

I think that you are right. It is dangerous to assume that all parents regard education in the same manner. Not all parents are responsible and see that their kids attend classes regularly, and work with them to keep their grades up. Most parents are concientious, but there are many who are not, and therein lies a problem. Some schools have a difficult time getting children to come to school. In our capital city not even 75% of the children made it to school the first day. You can imagine what the rest of the year is like. I'm sure that school systems try to work with families, but I would not want the job of enforcing the law with one family, and allowing another family a different set of rules. So sad that laws needed to be created in the first place to ensure that parents get their kids to school, but this is the world that we live in now.

My problem with this and so much of society and rules now is that the "BAD" people ruin it for the rest of us. Whatever happened to rewarding good behavior? Why should I or my family be penalized when we were doing all of the right things in the first place? Whatever happened to punishing those that are wrong and letting the rest of us continue with our "GOOD" behavior?

 

[tardin1964]

people should be able to pull there kids out of school if they want. my feeling on the subject though is that there are 180 school days a year. there are 185 days when there is no school. figure out a way to go to disney during those 185 days.