Helping kids with homework/studying

[Searc]

Not looking to change her answers but while I still can explain to her why it is incorrect and make sure she knows how to get the correct answer. Mostly now it is telling her she wrote her numbers or letters backwards.

How old is your oldest? That is something you'll want to watch, if they are younger.

 

[siren0119]

DS1 is in middle school now - he has ADHD so we've had to be a little more involved with homework since elementary school. But for us, that meant teaching him good work management skills - starting with asking where his homework list was, then asking which he'd like to work on first, then asking him to make sure it was complete (including his name on the paper) and checking it off his agenda/homework list. We wouldn't get involved in any of the actual work unless he asked for help, or if we could see he was really struggling with something.

DS2 is in 5th grade now, and he's much better at self-managing. We remind him to get started on his homework, and his teacher asks that all students have their parents check off that work was done - he shows me his assignments and i sign off only because his teacher expects it. And just like his brother, we don't get involved in the actual work unless he asks for help or we see frustration/struggling.

Do they get things wrong? Yep, and they should. The only way the teachers will know what they truly understand is if they see the mistakes. My job isn't to make sure my kid gets good grades, that's his job.

 

[jalapeno_pretzel]

I just ask if they have homework when they get home from school, and at the end of the night I ask if they've done their homework and if they've put it back in their backpacks. I don't look at it or supervise it in any way. Actually we've rarely had very much homework, our area seems to be getting rid of most of it for the elementary school ages at least. Frequently the only "homework" is for them to read 20 minutes, which they love to read so they would be doing that anyway.

 

[mjkacmom]

I don't help or look over homework unless my kids come to me and ask for help (which has only happened a handful of times). I don't even look to see what was assigned and make sure it's completed (unless there's an issue of missing work at the mid-term). Fortunately they have all been good students and tend to get their work done on their own (now aged 13-20). There have been a few instances where they messed up, but those were good learning experiences to see how difficult (or impossible) it was to fix what their laziness or carelessness had caused.

Same here, I’d help edit a paper, or quiz them on spelling (before finding spelling city), or help with math if asked, but I didn’t check homework or make sure it was done. They were mostly all A few B students, with some definite screw ups, which taught them more than I ever could.

 

[NYCgrrl]

Same here, I’d help edit a paper, or quiz them on spelling (before finding spelling city), or help with math if asked, but I didn’t check homework or make sure it was done. They were mostly all A few B students, with some definite screw ups, which taught them more than I ever could.

Thanks for making me google that. Normally, I do the spelling quizzes with DGD but great to know there is a dependable online resource. She does Khan Academy for geometry now and algebra before that which is fine by me since algebra is about as far as I can continue the charade of knowing math, LOL.

 

[fly girl]

Homework is a dreaded word in this house. I only have 1 child, and she HATES homework. It is the #1 argument we have in this house. More time is wasted complaining and whining about it, than actually just sitting down and doing it. Ugh, I wish she would get that through her head, but it hasn't yet. Although, it has improved. BTW, she doesn't struggle in school, just thinks when school is done, work should be done. lol (on some level, I secretly agree)

When she was in elementary school, I would check over all her homework. If it wasn't checked, it would be the most sorry, half assed job.

Now that she is in middle school, I don't check it all over. The responsibility and consequences lie on her. My job of reinforcer is done. I will ask her everyday what homework she has (more as a mental checklist for her.) I do not check the routine assignments, and will only see it if she asks for help. I do help her study for big tests by quizzing her. I do help with proof reading her book reports. But the biggest thing I do is creating mini tests right before her math exams, as her teacher this year doesn't give a review to take home. I find 15 math problems on the chapter that will refresh her memory. We have found this really does help, and she does much better by having a quick review the night before. (lesson learned after a few exams)

I am glad my role is diminishing, and I plan on having it reduce each semester.

 

[Lilsia]

We were pretty hands off. We would help them if they asked and it was mostly about math issues. My husband is really good at math so he would explain to them how to do it and never give them the answers. We made them accountable for their actions. If they did not do the work, then they suffered the consequences of it at school and at home. Children now are loosing the ability to think and do for themselves because of too much parental involvement.

 

[MrsCobraBubbles]

Homework is a way for teachers to get an idea of how students are grasping certain concepts. I stay out of homework as much as possible. I will help my kids and reteach if they ask me, but otherwise I don't do much more than look over homework to make sure it is completed.

 

[SaintsManiac]

We helped until this year, 4th grade. My daughter's teachers asked that we not help them. They only want us to make sure it gets done. I do help her study, as this is the first year that studying is actually necessary. I'm hoping to get her into some good habits for next year when things ramp up.

 

[mjkacmom]

Thanks for making me google that. Normally, I do the spelling quizzes with DGD but great to know there is a dependable online resource. She does Khan Academy for geometry now and algebra before that which is fine by me since algebra is about as far as I can continue the charade of knowing math, LOL.

It was a game changer, I wish I found it sooner. My twins were my last, separate classes, different vocabulary and spelling words each week.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

This is me vs my siblings. I wasn’t ready for no oversight with homework until about 8th grade because it never would have been completed.

The funny thing about it was that, although a struggle to get it done, DS had completed it - he was sitting next to his twin sister doing it (same assignment), and she would've thrown him under the bus in a heartbeat if he hadn't! What happened was that he wasn't turning it in, which I only learned when the 6th grade math teacher called me to say he was missing seven homework assignments! Say what??? Turns out (I think) he was beginning to not understand it and, being shy, he was somehow worried he'd get called on in class so in his 13 yr old brain, he thought it would be better to not turn it in than to be called on, or worse, have to go up to the board to demonstrate, than it would be to skip turning in seven assignments! It made sense to me when I remembered another teacher that year at Open House saying 6th graders are all about how they appear to others.

So I made a trip to the school, and he was punished, and a couple of months later I got another call from the same teacher that he was again missing seven assignments (that he had completed). So around we went again. We had to put more oversights in place with him, and more rules, at a time when they were telling us they should be more solo. So I had one who was, and one who wasn't. And it remained a struggle for him to get his work done, but he did, and turned in, and today he's a senior in college who absolutely cannot wait to have homework and papers as a thing of the past, lol.

 

[MooseBucks]

How old is your oldest? That is something you'll want to watch, if they are younger.

6yrs old

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Not looking to change her answers but while I still can explain to her why it is incorrect and make sure she knows how to get the correct answer. Mostly now it is telling her she wrote her numbers or letters backwards.

At the same time teachers are there to help kids out and they won't necessarily know how to help a particular student out if they don't know what the issue is and if a parent is the main corrector it may get left unknown.

I think as practices have changed (like Common Core Math and the like) it does become harder for parents to even know how to help their kids and different teachers do sometimes teach differently. Plus I do think, depending on the subject of course, we probably often forget the long way of figuring out answers. Not too many of us use the long routes after being taught the easy routes lol. Your child is young so this probably doesn't apply..yet. Just mentioning it though.

Maybe in respects to her writing her numbers and letters backwards mention this to the teacher and ask her what if anything she would like you to do. It's possible she will just handle it one on one in the classroom or that she had some techniques that might be more useful at home.