Taking a poll-giving your kids independence?

[JillSchorr]

Or those of you that sailed on the Disney Cruises before- have you given your children some independence to go about their way on the ship? I am not talking about dropping off at kids clubs. I have an 11 and 9 year old and wonder if I can feel safe if they want to go to a movie, or go to an arcade, or the aqua lab, or the muppet activity, etc without parental supervison?

Naturally it's only when we are all on the boat. I was planning on getting a magnetic dry erase board to put on the door to keep in touch with each other and we have those wave phones, riight?

 

[DISNEY FANTASY]

As my children became older I gave them ore independence, no two children are alike its how you judge them.

 

[jenjen3574]

I think what you are describing sounds appropriate for 9 and 11. Depending on maturity level I might give a little more latitude to the 11 yr old or require they stick together if they are going to be apart from you for a longer stretch or maybe if they are swimming.

I gave my son pretty much free reign when he was 11 on our first cruise and he was very careful to show me he was responsible enough to handle it. (I made it clear I would take it away if he didn't.) My daughter will be 10 on our next cruise and I plan to give her the same freedom. We'll check in with the wave phones and possibly a whiteboard as you suggest.

The best thing you can do for your children is to render yourself obsolete. Letting them have a few of their own adventures as they become preteens is a great way to loosen the apron strings a little.

 

[Disney mam]

I have just let my 10 year old DS have signing out privaliges as a trial run.. I told him to call me when he got from the lab to the edge and vice versa. TBH, he was great and very sensible. He wasn't allowed to the room by himself, only in the clubs. If he wanted to go back to the room we would get him.
His younger brother who is 8 and IMO a little more trusting than the older one wanted to go watch a show with his brother. We wanted to watch something else, so allowed this once. They went together and straight back to the clubs. I got a call to inform me they were back (as per my rules).

So, no elevators. Only allowed to go from club to club and let me know if he was moving. And definately no food or pool.

I was on edge at first, but after a few nights I relaxed a little. I would pop back and check on him or phone the clubs. The CM's were great and understanding.

 

[tweis]

My DS and DSS were both 11 when we cruised at the end of April and by the end of the cruise, were pretty much free to come and go as they pleased as long as they checked in with us, stayed together, carried their wave phone and did NOT go in the pool. We gave them a little freedom the first day and they earned more by showing us that they could be back when they were supposed to and let us know where they were at all times.

On their first cruise in 2012, they did not have these freedoms.

 

[tvguy]

Never as an issue with our kids. Cruises are our time to spend together, not apart. At home we might be together as a family an hour a day, cruises are our vacations we take to spend all our waking hours together.

 

[cedricandsophie]

My grandson is 12 and has been on his own for a year now. We have been on several cruises. He knows his way around th ship. I have a disabled adult daughter and we always bring her friend. They are gone from morning to night. The only time I know we will all meet up is for the show before dinner since we have late seating. They all use the wave phones and stay in touch. They aren't interested in doing our stuff nor we doing theirs....except of course for the slide where we all go together on occasion. We all have a great time and have much to share at dinner.

 

[cedricandsophie]

M grandson who is 12 has the run of the ship. As long as he has his wave phone and checks in periodically. He usually meets kids in the tween room to hang out with. My grand daughter is 17 now and always does her own thing. We meet for the show before dinner since we have late seating and then go to the predinner show in one of the lounges. Always have a lot to talk about at dinner!

 

[missyp]

This may be an odd response but I felt better letting my DS

 

[ShelsGoingToDisney]

I have 3 kids (14, 12, & 9) the rules they have is to always let us know where they are going and to not go anywhere alone (must be paired). On our last cruise the 2 older ones hung out together most the time. Our youngest met a friend at the BB court the first day and they were inseparable the rest of the cruise. He spent a lot of time away from us with his new friend, again always paired up and let us know where he was. They spent most the time at the BB court, ice cream machine, and movies.

None of my kids are fans of the kids' clubs so they have no interest in going there.

The freedom they have is one of the reasons they love the cruises so much in comparison to other vacation destinations.

 

[Ofinn]

As my children became older I gave them ore independence, no two children are alike its how you judge them.

I so agree with this. It amazes me that parents ask strangers if they should give their kids independence. As a parent you should know when your kid is ready.

 

[canadiandisneycruise]

All kids are different and you know yours best! All three of mine are different, & have had different privileges at different ages. It depends how responsible they are, & how comfortable they are on their own. Play it by ear- see hoe they each feel- and it might change during the cruise!!

 

[tinkerone]

heres a thread on the subject that is fairly recent. thought you may want to peruse it. your going to get a gizzilion opinions and thoughts so good luck with it.

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=3287228

 

[Donna3271]

I so agree with this. It amazes me that parents ask strangers if they should give their kids independence. As a parent you should know when your kid is ready.

yes, DF is a wise soul!