? Regarding leaving child alone in room

[Mouse House Mama]

Have you looked at the activities at AKL? They do have some programs for older kids.



My DD is a baton twirler and was lucky enough to earn herself a spot in the MK parade when she was 8 and again when she was 9. One of the other moms was also a WDW staffer, so I got to find out a bit about how seriously WDW takes the responsibility of the children in their care. If I had thought like you, I would have kept her from doing something she considered "the best day of her life"

BTW, the CM's in charge of the kids have a lot more to lose for making even a tiny mistake eg. not smiling enough, using a swear word, letting a child trip over a rock -- than any parent. They could lose their job for the smallest of incidents. And there is far more security around the children than you will ever know about. Just imagine if something happened to a kid in their care -- that's why they can never let anything happen.

Most kids are safer with the CM's at WDW than they are at school or even at home.

This is good info. See now I would have let my child be in the parade too. For us the boat thing is a completely different animal.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

A little defensive... I think she had a great point...

I don't think she was defensive. I think the poster was way over the top suggesting professional help and emotional damage from not being allowed on a Pirate Cruise. I think most people would agree that is a liitle alarmist wouldn't you? YMMV.

 

[mjkacmom]

I don't think she was defensive. I think the poster was way over the top suggesting professional help and emotional damage from not being allowed on a Pirate Cruise. I think most people would agree that is a liitle alarmist wouldn't you? YMMV.

I think her point is that you CAN be too overprotective, which CAN harm children in the end. People who won't let their children go places with other capable adults, who never teach their children that they are okay, even without mom or dad, people who won't let their children go on sleepovers, walk to school, ride their bikes with their friends - giving children opportunities to be independent teaches them life skills. I see many children being sheltered these days, because of things they hear on the news. The reason these stories make the news is because they are so infrequent.

 

[momx2]

I don't think she was defensive. I think the poster was way over the top suggesting professional help and emotional damage from not being allowed on a Pirate Cruise. I think most people would agree that is a liitle alarmist wouldn't you? YMMV.

I have tried to state things as politely as I can, but my post was in response to her posting that she is very paranoid about her children. I posted it because if she really is that paranoid I think she could need help because I am watching this go down in the real world first hand and it is sad. I would never want my child clinging to me at the age of 6 just because her grandparent came in and she wasn't expecting them, as I just did an hour ago with my niece. Maybe I'm projecting my real life concerns onto this board, but trust me being over protective can be just as dangerous and damaging as being overly permissive.

 

[JUJU814]

I don't think she was defensive. I think the poster was way over the top suggesting professional help and emotional damage from not being allowed on a Pirate Cruise. I think most people would agree that is a liitle alarmist wouldn't you? YMMV.

I think "way over the top" is an understatement! I'm wondering if she's speak to the woman's face like that. I'm sorry, but you don't make attacks like that on people. She was IMMENSELY out of line and downright cruel and rude.

Gosh, I feel for the poor woman who just asked a simple question of leaving the child in the room for a couple of minutes. Note to self: never ask a group of moms you don't know such questions! LOL

NOBODY here has a right to be so darn judgemental of others parenting. Just trust your gut and do what's right for you and your family!

 

[momx2]

Really? Really? You think I need to seel professional help, really??? Emotionally harmed, really? You know nothing about my children, and I am not about to expose them on these boards, But I will say, you should never judge anyone without knowing the circumstances. I was just going to laugh at your posts, since I am not the only one who feels the way I do, and you are judging them also. Your comments and your high and mighty attitude is very comical!! I have enjoyed reading your posts, really I have.

My princesses and I are all on a first name basis with our therapist, and our psychiatrist, no not what you think!! There is no way my girls can be out of my sight at this age, unless they are at school or church...you have no idea, so don't judge. My family, my children, not your decision, end of story.

Well, I'm sorry you felt compelled to resort to name calling. If you read my posts I have not been high and mighty or judgmental. I stated my true fears for overprotected children. You are the one that labeled yourself paranoid, not me. No, I don't know your circumstances and as I posted there could be disabilities that I don't know about and I guess I should have added circumstances also. You are right... your children, your decision.

My 8 year old is just starting to ride bikes in front of our house and it scares me to death, but I know she has to learn to do this and my 11 year old goes to her friends on her bike, she has a cell, so I'm a little better, but I'm still afraid. I guess my point is I have to let my feelings go sometimes and be afraid so they can learn, same here, my children, my decision.

 

[momx2]

This is good info. See now I would have let my child be in the parade too. For us the boat thing is a completely different animal.

You know, my mom was like that with going to the lake. I could not go to the lake with my friends in the summer. She could just see me drowning. It was because she almost drowned as a child. So, my entire teenage years when all my friends were at the lake I never, never, ever got to go because she projected her fears on to me. I guess that is what I've been trying to say all along and have not been doing a very good job at it.

I wanted to add also...I'm not sure if I would have let my girls go on the boat at 4. I know not my youngest because she didn't follow instruction very well. So I can understand this with younger kids. Like myself and so many others, including Mouse House Mama, have said on this thread, it really depends up the child.

 

[momx2]

I'm sorry, I really don't mean to flame you, but you do know you are handicapping your children? If you are this paranoid you really need to seek professional help to deal with this situation. I think you're probably a great mother in every other way and obviously love your children, but your children will likely be emoitionally harmed by this sort of behavior.

I just quoted myself so readers could see what post I was referring to with this post. First, I want to apologize to Rachelsmom1 for suggesting she seek professional help. After thinking about it, I concede that I crossed the line by saying that. I'm sure she is not so paranoid as to need to do that. Second, I truly did not mean to insult anyone, but in re-reading my post I can see how it is an insult. Third, I still stand by my belief that some parents do overprotect their children to a point of harm. The harm may not be immediate, but it does happen. This was the point I intended to make and it was overshadowed by my poor choice of words.

 

[kevschickee]

I can not believe some one would say a parent who is protective needs mental help. I am protective and when I see fit I will allow my children to do certain things. The same way my mom did things and you know what? I am a happy, normal adult that is not clingy and I happen to be a great mom and wife because of how protective my mom was. Nope never in a million years would I leave a 8 year old home alone so that means I would never leave them in a hotel alone. So for anyone who thinks I need help good for you because you are probably the one that needs it

edit-Ok I just saw the post above. Thank you for posting that. I do not agree about the harm part but we can agree to disagree

 

[redrosesix]

This is good info. See now I would have let my child be in the parade too. For us the boat thing is a completely different animal.

Hmmm....sounds like you have a phobia about water.

You do know that when you drop your kid off at the gate for the parade you don't see them again for several hours, and then it's marching down Main Street with 10,000 people watching them? If you can let your kid do that...

 

[My5Mouseketeers]

I can not believe some one would say a parent who is protective needs mental help. I am protective and when I see fit I will allow my children to do certain things. The same way my mom did things and you know what? I am a happy, normal adult that is not clingy and I happen to be a great mom and wife because of how protective my mom was. Nope never in a million years would I leave a 8 year old home alone so that means I would never leave them in a hotel alone. So for anyone who thinks I need help good for you because you are probably the one that needs it

edit-Ok I just saw the post above. Thank you for posting that. I do not agree about the harm part but we can agree to disagree

I'm not saying whether the parent needs/does not need mental help, but the original post was about someone who stated they were "paranoid" not just protective. Truly paranoid should seek mental help because it can be debilitating.

 

[momx2]

I can not believe some one would say a parent who is protective needs mental help. I am protective and when I see fit I will allow my children to do certain things. The same way my mom did things and you know what? I am a happy, normal adult that is not clingy and I happen to be a great mom and wife because of how protective my mom was. Nope never in a million years would I leave a 8 year old home alone so that means I would never leave them in a hotel alone. So for anyone who thinks I need help good for you because you are probably the one that needs it

edit-Ok I just saw the post above. Thank you for posting that. I do not agree about the harm part but we can agree to disagree

I'm protective also and only allow my children to do things I think they are capable of handling and I have never left my children home alone at the age of 8, but I have walked next door while they were here or went in the back yard and they have walked to their friends house, etc. I don't think anyone here is advocating leaving 8 year olds to their own devices. I think we sound like the same type of mom, but if you have never seen a truly clingy, dependent child then you don't know the harm I'm talking about.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Hmmm....sounds like you have a phobia about water.

You do know that when you drop your kid off at the gate for the parade you don't see them again for several hours, and then it's marching down Main Street with 10,000 people watching them? If you can let your kid do that...

I do have a bit of a phobia about water.It's not debilitating though. We swim almost daily when the weather is warm. As for the parade- well they wouldn't be stranded in a lake and have to swim and swim and swim to safety.

 

[stella27]

I'm protective also and only allow my children to do things I think they are capable of handling and I have never left my children home alone at the age of 8, but I have walked next door while they were here or went in the back yard and they have walked to their friends house, etc. I don't think anyone here is advocating leaving 8 year olds to their own devices. I think we sound like the same type of mom, but if you have never seen a truly clingy, dependent child then you don't know the harm I'm talking about.

I know a child exactly like this. She is turning 8 this summer, and she freaks out if her mother leaves her sight. She recently got upset because mom and dad put her to bed and then went out on the back patio to sit and talk. The child was sooo upset because "what if we needed you and couldn't find you?"

I think this particular child is unusual, but I also think her mom needs to start building the child's confidence. *this* is an 8 year old you could NOT leave in the room while you went to get some coffee. My 8 year old is waaayy different and I will leave him at home with his brother and sister while I run a few quick errands. He knows how to call 911; he knows to get them all out right away in the event of a fire; he calls me on my cell phone; he knows our neighbors...I just don't worry about him and he likes the responsibility.

I also just sent him and his 6 year old sister on a plane by themselves to visit my parents. They did great, and you could just see how proud they were of themselves for doing it by themselves.

I do know that I would go crazy if the first little girl I mentioned was mine. I would do eeverything in my power to build her up to have more confidence in herself and her abilities to survive without me for more than 5 minutes.

 

[redrosesix]

I do have a bit of a phobia about water.It's not debilitating though. We swim almost daily when the weather is warm. As for the parade- well they wouldn't be stranded in a lake and have to swim and swim and swim to safety.

True. If they get into some kind of trouble (found out about this because DD has asthma) they rush them through the secret doors into the back areas and they're picked up in a golf cart.

So maybe there's a motorboat out there waiting in case the pirate cruise gets into trouble? I wouldn't be surprised if there was.

 

[NotUrsula]

I do have a bit of a phobia about water.It's not debilitating though. We swim almost daily when the weather is warm. As for the parade- well they wouldn't be stranded in a lake and have to swim and swim and swim to safety.

They wouldn't have to swim and swim at all. First off, they are all wearing full PFD's at ALL times, even when off the boat -- if they fall in they will float effortlessly. Second, the boat stays very near shore, only about 20 yards out at the farthest. Third, there are at least 3 lifeguard-certified CM's manning the boat, which is a pontoon; it can't capsize and it would take deliberate sabotage to sink, but even if by some miracle it did, the lake is shallow that close to shore; the CM's would pull the children to shore on a line very quickly. Disney's boats are all equipped with multiple automatic EPIRBS; a distress signal would sound instantly the minute those beacons hit water. Every boat on the waterway would respond instantly, as they all belong to the company.

FTR, though I grew up in a boat-owning family and am quite experienced with them, DS doesn't have that experience. He started going on the Bay Lake Pirate Cruise when he was four, went out several times, and decided that he was too old for it by age 8.

 

[Don Disney]

JUJU814-Thank-you for being the voice of reason!!! A LOT of these posts are VERY judgemental,and that really stinks.I really wonder if some of these folks have a clue. NOW, I bid this topic farewell-just had to compliment JUJU on that excellent post!

 

[maddiesmom0116]

I have left my DD5 in the room to go to the car to grab something a couple of times with the condition she does not open the door to anyone except me and I had her put on the safety (privacy)lock, so anyone with a key cannot get in. I won't do this while she is sleeping because the safety lock cannot be put on then. They had that little girl Madyln I think, snatched from her room in some foreign country while her parents were at dinner. I would be to stressed to leave my DD unless the safety lock was on and it was a few minutes.

 

[mjkacmom]

JUJU814-Thank-you for being the voice of reason!!! A LOT of these posts are VERY judgemental,and that really stinks.I really wonder if some of these folks have a clue. NOW, I bid this topic farewell-just had to compliment JUJU on that excellent post!

Looks who is being judgemental, just because most don't agree with you. I think the majority "have a clue," don't believe the boogyman is around every corner, and want to raise adults, not raise children in a bubble, and give their children the independence and confidence to grow up. I, for one, am glad I'm raising my children today, vs. when I was growing up, without modern technology, such as cellphones and GPS's. I'm just glad my parents trusted me enough to be out of their sight!

 

[jodifla]

I know a child exactly like this. She is turning 8 this summer, and she freaks out if her mother leaves her sight. She recently got upset because mom and dad put her to bed and then went out on the back patio to sit and talk. The child was sooo upset because "what if we needed you and couldn't find you?"

I think this particular child is unusual, but I also think her mom needs to start building the child's confidence. *this* is an 8 year old you could NOT leave in the room while you went to get some coffee. My 8 year old is waaayy different and I will leave him at home with his brother and sister while I run a few quick errands. He knows how to call 911; he knows to get them all out right away in the event of a fire; he calls me on my cell phone; he knows our neighbors...I just don't worry about him and he likes the responsibility.

I also just sent him and his 6 year old sister on a plane by themselves to visit my parents. They did great, and you could just see how proud they were of themselves for doing it by themselves.

I do know that I would go crazy if the first little girl I mentioned was mine. I would do eeverything in my power to build her up to have more confidence in herself and her abilities to survive without me for more than 5 minutes.

Yep. I had an overprotective mom. It took me quite awhile to shake off all her fears and phobias -- and this was the 1960s-70s. She probably considered downright laid-back by today's standards.

The ironic thing is, the vast majority of kids are harmed by people the families know well.