Parents of the High School Class of 2017/College 2021

[Poohforyou]

Tell that girl to eat more at school! That seems very thin to me even if she's short. Maybe you can send her food via Amazon if she doesn't like the school's food.





I am so sorry @LilTinkFan. Like @bethbuchall says we all fly at different times and ways. I think it's better that she know this NOW and be able to withdraw from college instead of being unhappy and having crappy grades to show for it. She will find her way {{hugs}}.

I think Aprilgail and my daughter are about the same size - mine is just shy of 5' and about 86lb. She eats a ton though. It's just her metabolism.

 

[LilTinkFan]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

 

[bjscheel]

Good for her for being willing to put herself out there to find new people! So glad she and her roomies are doing well and settling in with each other.
Are there clubs etc. on the campus?

There is a list of clubs but I don't know how many are active. I told her there is supposed to be a graphic design club- she didn't know anything about it but said time spent in the computer lab on homework is basically like a GD club. She does like spending time there. Otherwise the ones on the list that would interest her most are the Christian ones and she is trying one this week. She likes running, and there is a Glow Run coming up too. She's been going to church on her own, but it's mostly older people and young kids. There is another church in our denomination there geared towards her generation, but she likes the traditional one, it's like home I will admit part of her purpose is she'd like to have a boyfriend eventually (who's not in her major). The fire science, welding, and auto body buildings are right next to her classes, but she won't just start wandering through them despite my suggestion

 

[mom2rtk]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

 

[aprilgail]

Tell that girl to eat more at school! That seems very thin to me even if she's short. Maybe you can send her food via Amazon if she doesn't like the school's food.

She is very short- she is 5'0". She orders food delivery from Door Dash, Uber Eats and Grub Hub from local restaurants - I know she is so over the food from the dining halls there after just 2 weeks. On the weekends she does go out to restaurants there- it "sort of" like NYC with many food choices. Like at home she "forgets to eat" (which to me is bewildering LOL) but she certainly never forgets to eat her junk food! There is a LOT of walking on her campus from class to class and work and back and all over Boston so she is getting more exercise than she is used to. She now has a microwave pasta cooker so she can at least make herself some pasta in the room.

 

[J'aime Paris]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

I'm sorry to hear this LilTinkFan!
Take care of your DD and yourself!

 

[punkin]

I

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

I'm sorry. I'm going through something similar with my sophomore. She is really having a hard time. We had tears and panic attacks this weekend, but she went back. We shall see for how long.

 

[okeydokey]

Sometimes their first choice just isn't the right choice for them. They will find a new way. Hoping for the best for you.

 

[mamacatnv]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

I'm so sorry y'all are going thru this.
She's young, time heals and she will find her path.

 

[Pamlur]

Many years ago, my son graduated from a tiny high school; so tiny that they alternated chemistry and physics. He somehow missed taking chemistry, but scored so high on the science part of the ACT that his college advisor (big state university engineering program) missed that important fact and put him in advanced college chemistry. He panicked so badly over that course that he was floundering in everything. He was having panic attacks, he was too young to think of going to his advisor, he was suicidal. He was living with his dad when he graduated; his dad called me and said "I am going to get him", and I agreed. He stayed home that year, then went to a local college and became a paramedic and a paramedic instructor. That was what he had always wanted to be from childhood, so all was good.

 

[donac]

I have been a reader for a while. I have two sons 32 and 27 so I have been through this. My older son had a rough first year. His girlfriend had broken up with him before he left for college, he had a crappy roommate and was not sleeping (found this out from my mother, he didn't tell us). The topper was his second semester when he kept putting us off about his grades. I finally figured out that I had his password since I paid his bill. I flipped when I saw them. The worst point for me was that he failed calculus and I was teaching AP Calc at the time. We gave him three weeks to explain why he should go back and he never did. We signed him up for the local community college and he thrived. He wanted to get his AA so he spent two years there and then went back to the college he started at. He made Dean's List there all 4 semesters .

He has gotten his Masters and is now teaching labs at the two schools he graduated from.

I know how you are feeling but things work out for a reason. I wish you all peace since you need it. Good luck

 

[SmallWorld71]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

I have no great advice, but just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you all.

 

[AustinTink]

I read through your posts and my mailbox with tissues. Thanks for asking how she is, and how I am.
She basically said "I'm coming home. You can go get the rest of my stuff or not, I'm not going back."
I've emailed the housing office and registrar to see what our next steps are. Right now I'm just deeply sad and worried.

I'm so sorry she is suffering. I truly believe everything happens for a reason, though. She will come out stronger on the other side of this brief moment in time. Hugs.

 

[AustinTink]

My son came home last weekend and I was shocked by how thin he is. He has gone from a 34 waist to a 30 since school began. He says he is eating, but I have my doubts. He and the girlfriend broke up the first week of school and he has been nursing a broken heart along with all the others stresses of college. I'm worried about him.

 

[mamacatnv]

I have been a reader for a while. I have two sons 32 and 27 so I have been through this. My older son had a rough first year. His girlfriend had broken up with him before he left for college, he had a crappy roommate and was not sleeping (found this out from my mother, he didn't tell us). The topper was his second semester when he kept putting us off about his grades. I finally figured out that I had his password since I paid his bill. I flipped when I saw them. The worst point for me was that he failed calculus and I was teaching AP Calc at the time. We gave him three weeks to explain why he should go back and he never did. We signed him up for the local community college and he thrived. He wanted to get his AA so he spent two years there and then went back to the college he started at. He made Dean's List there all 4 semesters .

He has gotten his Masters and is now teaching labs at the two schools he graduated from.

I know how you are feeling but things work out for a reason. I wish you all peace since you need it. Good luck

Your story is so similar to mine. DS headed off to college, he was having a grand time, first semester did great. Come spring of his Freshman year, his high school girlfriend and he parted ways. Unbeknownst to us, he was spiraling down. He discovered parties, alcohol and his xbox. I had no idea until the day I showed up to help him clean out his dorm and move home for the summer that he had failed stats, and was pulling C's and D's in just about everything else. He lost his state scholarship, he lost his corporate scholarship and I was convinced his life was over (I know, drama much lol but I was so disappointed and convinced he was doomed). When I got over being disappointed, then I was just mad! I didn't want to spend another dime on his schooling etc. DH came along and with his usual voice of reason after getting the entire story from DS who basically got behind, didn't know how to get caught up and instead of dropping classes just continued plodding on. DH said to me and to DS "This is your one free pass" he said to me "we sent him to school for a lot of reasons, what he learns in a book was just one of those reasons".

So, DS headed back in the fall, pulled straight A's, earned his state scholarship back and never looked back. He took summer school and it took him an extra semester to actually graduate, but he did so with a 3.5ish GPA, earned a spot in Physical Therapist program and is now a D.P.T.

 

[mamacatnv]

My son came home last weekend and I was shocked by how thin he is. He has gone from a 34 waist to a 30 since school began. He says he is eating, but I have my doubts. He and the girlfriend broke up the first week of school and he has been nursing a broken heart along with all the others stresses of college. I'm worried about him.

Poor kid, that's a rough start. DD says her friends have lost weight as well mainly because they are just more active, classes are farther apart etc.

 

[J'aime Paris]

My son came home last weekend and I was shocked by how thin he is. He has gone from a 34 waist to a 30 since school began. He says he is eating, but I have my doubts. He and the girlfriend broke up the first week of school and he has been nursing a broken heart along with all the others stresses of college. I'm worried about him.

A 34 to a 30 is very worrisome! HUGS!
The transition to college can be tough, but add in a relationship problem and that's a whole lot for a young adult to handle!!

 

[Pamlur]

My granddaughter, instead of gaining the "freshman 15", lost it! It's all that walking from class to class and trying to figure out when to fit a meal in. And they usually prefer junk food to actually going to the dining room to eat. My GD also said that the main dining room served the edible food when it was a Parents' Weekend and not so much when it was just them.

 

[SmallWorld71]

Sheesh! What's with all these kids losing weight? I looked at food in college and gained 15 pounds.
I haven't actually seen DS yet, but he really can't afford to lose weight. He was a whopping 118 pounds (5'7") when he left us which works out to a 28/29" inch waist, with a belt. There's nothing to him. He's also one who 'forgets' to eat.
He comes by it honestly as DH was 6'1" and 135 pounds when we were married. Sadly for DD, she has followed in my footsteps when it comes to weight. She could have used the naturally thin frame in ballet.

 

[punkin]

Neither Niece nor DD are eating at school. Niece subsists on Starbucks mocha frapuchinos and DD lives on flaming hot Cheetos and salt and vinegar chips. They're at different schools, but both say the food is inedible.