Making my mother cry

[Sarahslay]

I'm not singling anyone out, but I want to address a point that's come up several times.

The DISboards was created for discussion of all things Disney - good and bad. You'll find literally thousands of posts here complaining about some experience with Disney. And many more talking about the good times we've had at Disney parks and with Disney movies, shows, games, etc. Talking to people we don't know about Disney? That's pretty much what we do all day here.

The OP's post is something we see a lot of here, and it's also a good example of what I love about this board. Someone's having troubles that are sucking the fun out of their vacation, and posters here jumped right in to try to help. Lots of good practical suggestions, and friendly support, too.

Unfortunately, I've also had to remove multiple personal attacks on the poster. It's inevitable that you'll come across something that you disagree with, or even something that makes you angry, while you're reading here. Respectful disagreement is fine. Telling someone they shouldn't have posted or accusing them of lying is not. If you don't like a post, move on to another one. We've got plenty.

And I have been bullied in the past relentlessly for stating I had a bad experience at a restaurant. But where is the is the line drawn for allowing comments to stay and deleting them?

 

[zoo2tycoon]

I understand where the mods are coming from but my question is when do people have to stop blaming Disney for things that are beyond their control?

If you don’t book the correct room type (handicapped or preferred), then you might get a location in the boondocks. It is not the fault of Disney if a person doesn’t book the correct room.

Disney doesn’t control the weather so the rain is not their fault - knowing your are going during rainy/hurricane season should make you be prepared and buy cheap ponchos if you don’t want the much heavier Disney ones (that are expensive).

Rides break down and some stop when the disabled are loaded and unloaded. This is not anything Disney can control.

A person not allowing enough time to get from one place to another (able bodied or disabled) is not the fault of Disney. If you schedule dinner immediately prior to the final night of Illuminations that is not the fault of Disney.

Drunk people- it’s Food and Wine time so of course there will be some. Packed busses yes it’s busy at the end of the night. Sit on a bench and wait for the crowds to thin.

You can’t compare Universal to Disney.

We all need to be accountable for our trip planning and know our limitations and endurance. If you require special assistance ask for it and make requests ahead of time. Book a room category that is suitable for your needs. Book one with two beds, a handicapped room, etc. Allow more time between FastPasses.

Yes, Disney does wrong and there are rude CMs, but we need to be accountable for things Disney has no control over. If room missing things, rude CMs go to front desk or guest services and explain things. Disney can’t fix things that are within their control if you don’t tell them,

 

[MomOTwins]

I sincerely hope OP's trip winds up being better from here on out! I too have wound up in the last room at what felt like the ends of the earth. And I know how frustrating it is when your plan doesn't work out and you end up missing things due to bad timing or ride breakdowns.

I do hope that OP isn't discouraged away from disboards. For everyone on here: please remember that OP is a teen and I don't know about your family, but my kids are generally not the ones responsible for booking rooms and researching vacation planning.

And we all have made "rookie mistakes" like not packing a poncho once or twice! ​

OP: I hope the takeaway you get here is not that you did anything wrong (lord knows we all need to vent a little sometimes). And I hope that you are able to sift through the personal attacks to see that people here do have some useful suggestions for avoiding pitfalls in the event you do plan a future trip.

 

[LSUmiss]

Op, can you not just share a bed with your mom to at least alleviate one problem? Idk if your male or female. It’d be kinda weird if you are a boy. But, if not, can y’all sleep in the same bed?

 

[kaytieeldr]

And I have been bullied in the past relentlessly for stating I had a bad experience at a restaurant. But where is the is the line drawn for allowing comments to stay and deleting them?

Disagreeing, even criticizing, isn't bullying. I do see some sarcasm on the last page of a thread about a bad restaurant experience, but unless there were some posts removed, there's no bullying.

Different volunteer Moderators will react differently. @LynneM fe of it necessary to remove one of more posts from this thread. The Restaurants Moderator(s) apparently did not feel there was anything wrong with the other thread.

 

[Meglen]

Op has yet to reply to anything .. I'm inclined to just assume things got better or they were just blowing smoke.

 

[Sarahslay]

Disagreeing, even criticizing, isn't bullying. I do see some sarcasm on the last page of a thread about a bad restaurant experience, but unless there were some posts removed, there's no bullying.

Different volunteer Moderators will react differently. @LynneM fe of it necessary to remove one of more posts from this thread. The Restaurants Moderator(s) apparently did not feel there was anything wrong with the other thread.

Well mine was from last year and I was actually bullied, seriously, made me leave the boards for many months because I just couldn't take it, and it wasn't in the restaurants thread, I didn't even know there was a restaurants thread. Oh well.

 

[AngiTN]

Well mine was from last year and I was actually bullied, seriously, made me leave the boards for many months because I just couldn't take it, and it wasn't in the restaurants thread, I didn't even know there was a restaurants thread. Oh well.

There are some bullies around here without a doubt. Some can stick around and remember that opinions from strangers are of no consequence and aren't affected by the bullies but feelings are still hurt.
Hopefully, you've utilized the Ignore feature for those involved

 

[FancyNancy]

OP I am so sorry that your vacation did not have a magical start. I hope that some of the issues you have been experiencing have either turned around or been resolved. You're only 16 and a year older than my daughter. Seeing your mom cry can be so very hard sweetie. I'm sorry you have had to experience that on a vacation that you have probably very much been looking forward to. Lots of people here have given you some great advice! I hope you've been able to utilize some of their excellent tips!

 

[kaytieeldr]

Well mine was from last year and I was actually bullied, seriously, made me leave the boards for many months because I just couldn't take it, and it wasn't in the restaurants thread, I didn't even know there was a restaurants thread. Oh well.

I'm guessing it wasn't clear that I went back and read that entire thread before I posted here. There was some criticism and there were some suggestions. As I said above, unless some posts were removed from that thread, I see no bullying.

 

[Sarahslay]

I'm guessing it wasn't clear that I went back and read that entire thread before I posted here. There was some criticism and there were some suggestions. As I said above, unless some posts were removed from that thread, I see no bullying.

Oh they were removed after I emailed the dis and asked them to please delete the thread because I was tired of the abuse. They went in and deleted a ton but not the thread. I got private messages too calling me all kinds of names, it was fun. Oh well, no need to pick on people who were bullied by calling them out and telling them they weren't, you're definitely not helping any situation but are contributing to me going elsewhere for info.

I do have a theory about this post, which isn't bad, just that maybe the OP thought they were posting on an official Disney forum that Disney reads thinking they were contacting Disney about their problems. Just a theory though, I can see how that can easily happen if someone tries to google.

 

[Sarahslay]

There are some bullies around here without a doubt. Some can stick around and remember that opinions from strangers are of no consequence and aren't affected by the bullies but feelings are still hurt.
Hopefully, you've utilized the Ignore feature for those involved

Oh definitely I have, I sometimes wonder if it makes some of the posts different for me since I can't see some comments lol, oh well. On with my day, I've got trips to plan (woohoo!!)

 

[AngiTN]

Oh definitely I have, I sometimes wonder if it makes some of the posts different for me since I can't see some comments lol, oh well. On with my day, I've got trips to plan (woohoo!!)

It does. I have enough on Ignore that I can tell I'm missing some things here and there. IF (big if on purpose) I think I need to see everything, there a link at the bottom of the thread page to reveal ignored posts. It's only for that viewing, posts will continue to be ignored on future visits.

Enjoy your next trip. I leave Saturday morning. I get a day and night all alone before the rest of my group arrives on Sunday.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Oh they were removed after I emailed the dis and asked them to please delete the thread because I was tired of the abuse. They went in and deleted a ton but not the thread.

Then I'm not sure what the issue is? Simply because this forum's volunteer Moderator chose to explain why/that she removed some posts while the Mods on a different DIS forum removed posts without explanation doesn't mean no 'line' exists.

I got private messages too calling me all kinds of names, it was fun.

Those too should have been (and I assume were?) reported. If anything violated DIS guidelines, I'm sure those posters were given infraction points. If they were truly bad enough, a poster might be permanently banned.

That's not information Moderators are going to share. Not even with the attackee.

Oh well, no need to pick on people who were bullied by calling them out and telling them they weren't, you're definitely not helping any situation but are contributing to me going elsewhere for info.

I did not see any bullying in that thread when I read it within the last two days, so I said that. It's regrettable if my statement makes anyone feel picked on.

 

[Sarahslay]

Then I'm not sure what the issue is? Simply because this forum's volunteer Moderator chose to explain why/that she removed some posts while the Mods on a different DIS forum removed posts without explanation doesn't mean no 'line' exists.

Those too should have been (and I assume were?) reported. If anything violated DIS guidelines, I'm sure those posters were given infraction points. If they were truly bad enough, a poster might be permanently banned.

That's not information Moderators are going to share. Not even with the attackee.

I did not see any bullying in that thread when I read it within the last two days, so I said that. It's regrettable if my statement makes anyone feel picked on.

Why are you spending so much of your time on this? It is not that important, to go back to a post from well over a year ago and read the whole thing just to come in here and tell me I wasn't bullied. Just because you don't see it now doesn't mean it didn't happen, that was a long time ago and really the past is the past especially in this case. On to greener pastures.

 

[kaytieeldr]

Why are you spending so much of your time on this? It is not that important, to go back to a post from well over a year ago and read the whole thing just to come in here and tell me I wasn't bullied.

Thank you for your concern about how I spend my time. As a DIS member, I was surprised at the nonspecific* accusation that some Moderators don't seem to care about bullying or guideline violations. They do.

I did not see any bullying in the referenced thread, so I asked.

Just because you don't see it now doesn't mean it didn't happen,

I agree. Again, that's why I asked. Unspecified Moderators were accused of not caring about bullying. They do. They did. They responded to reports by removing the posts - just like Lynne M did here, but with publicizing why or when. Incomplete or inaccurate accusations are unfair to the many people who volunteer their time to keep these forums enjoyable.

that was a long time ago and really the past is the past especially in this case.

It's past, sure, but important enough to be referenced over a year later.

*nonspecific in that neither the forum nor the Moderator(s) were identified

 

[TinkerBelle_325]

OP - I hope your vacation has improved. I would definitely recommend going down to the front desk at SSR and see what they can do about getting you a different room location.

Why are you spending so much of your time on this? It is not that important, to go back to a post from well over a year ago and read the whole thing just to come in here and tell me I wasn't bullied. Just because you don't see it now doesn't mean it didn't happen, that was a long time ago and really the past is the past especially in this case. On to greener pastures.

One could also ask why you are spending so much time and energy on this thread talking about your past experiences

 

[Sarahslay]

OP - I hope your vacation has improved. I would definitely recommend going down to the front desk at SSR and see what they can do about getting you a different room location.



One could also ask why you are spending so much time and energy on this thread talking about your past experiences

because they seem to be targeting me, I happen to be home sick so that is why I have so much time, I'm actually looking up info for a trip I'm planning for next Christmas and every now and then see the little bell light up with numbers. It was relevant because I wondered what the tipping point was, I wasn't being mean or nasty, just wondering. No need to attack innocent people, no one has done anything wrong, but it is a shame that people act like this.

 

[kaytieeldr]

because they seem to be targeting me,

Questioning, especially in an attempt to gain information, is not targeting.

It was relevant because I wondered what the tipping point was,

Again, different Moderators moderate differently. Simply because the Restaurant forum Moderators did not advise the entire thread/community that they had removed posts (and gave infractions to no, one, some, or all guideline violators) clearly implies that was the(ir) tipping point.

There is nothing in that thread that would even hint at the need to close the thread. As I said, in reviewing that thread, I saw no bullying. So I questioned the statement, as well as the implication that some Moderators are doing a lesser job than others.

 

[phyllis1966]

because they seem to be targeting me, I happen to be home sick so that is why I have so much time, I'm actually looking up info for a trip I'm planning for next Christmas and every now and then see the little bell light up with numbers. It was relevant because I wondered what the tipping point was, I wasn't being mean or nasty, just wondering. No need to attack innocent people, no one has done anything wrong, but it is a shame that people act like this.

to you, sorry you’re feeling homesick, and I agree with your avatar pic 100%!