Love hate relationship with bringing guests

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

One of our biggest benefits of owning DVC that we never thought about before buying was being able to take people with us on vacation with us. It’s worked out for us numerous times but it’s finally bitten me in the rear.

We banked and borrowed to make a full week in a 2 bedroom at Boulder ridge happen. Discussed plans several times. And now….two weeks before the trip, two are dropping out. It renders the upgrade to the two bedroom a waste of additional points. Never saw this coming and I feel like this was something they knew was a possibility for several weeks now but never brought it up. We will make the most of the trip but it has made me rethink how we approach these trips in the future. I never want anyone to pay money for points when we offer to cover the room, but without something on the line, I don’t think there is a sense of commitment or responsibility for bailing last minute. They are loosing their ticket $$ since they were military tickets purchased by another family member that is still going. They are upset about it but don’t seem to have any guilt for us booking a room to accommodate them. Not to mention all the dining we booked to accommodate their preferences and schedule.

Upside is, it’s my favorite resort and my dad is still going (so far but at this point nothing will surprise me). Now we can have lots of rest time instead of trying to cram everything in for a first timer. No one will rain on my Disney trip but no more free rooms either.

 

[Counting Stars]

I feel you. Unless you are another owner, I don't think others really understand: a. the generosity involved in giving up points you could have used yourself , b. how badly owners feel when they see their points being wasted or lost. For the dropouts its an opportunity lost. I hope your trip works from this point forward. Your Dad should feel really good about his accommodations! I hope you have a very special and memorable time with your Dad on this trip. That alone is worth all the points.

 

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

I feel you. Unless you are another owner, I don't think others really understand: a. the generosity involved in giving up points you could have used yourself , b. how badly owners feel when they see their points being wasted or lost. For the dropouts its an opportunity lost. I hope your trip works from this point forward. Your Dad should feel really good about his accommodations! I hope you have a very special and memorable time with your Dad on this trip. That alone is worth all the points.

Yes my dad gets an entire room to himself! He thinks Disney isn’t relaxing but it will be now.

 

[EdnaMarieMode]

I get it. I think that people who aren’t DVC or other timeshare members don’t necessarily add up the costs. Friends think my family goes to Disney every other year (or more often depending on how we use our points) “for free except flights and tickets.” We all know that’s not how this works.

I have a family member who doesn’t understand why I’m not booking a 2 BR at BCV for 4 of us for our next trip and instead booked a 1 BR at BLT. Reason being I don’t want my sons sharing a pullout couch and at BCV they would have to unless I go to a 2BR and at BLT there’s a sleeper chair. There’s no understanding that points cost something and it would be a waste for us to use that many points for way more space than we need.

Inviting people along was one and done for me.

 

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

There’s no understanding that points cost something and it would be a waste for us to use that many points for way more space than we need.

so true! My sis in-law was on the fence one year and I flat out told her that I can either rent the points for $$ or use them to upgrade to a 2bedroom if she and her family were coming.

 

[Sammie]

I don't invite others, as I want my own room and I want the living space accessible 24/7. I would rather stay home than being cramped and bedroom sharing. I am sure your Dad will have a great time.

 

[AdamsMum]

Sorry that happened to you. I know some think its petty, but when people come with me they share the cost of the points (maintenance fees only) they need to know that it costs something. My kids have left the nest now, but as a single mum, I couldn't afford to pay for someone elses room. My family and friends know that. They were always happy to stay in such a great resort/location for such a great price. Of course, my kids go on mum's points for free, I'm just happy to have them all to myself for a week.
I hope this doesn't spoil your trip, I'm glad you're at least at your favourite resort. Enjoy!

 

[john7994]

Sorry that happened to you. I know some think its petty, but when people come with me they share the cost of the points (maintenance fees only) they need to know that it costs something. My kids have left the nest now, but as a single mum, I couldn't afford to pay for someone elses room. My family and friends know that. They were always happy to stay in such a great resort/location for such a great price. Of course, my kids go on mum's points for free, I'm just happy to have them all to myself for a week.
I hope this doesn't spoil your trip, I'm glad you're at least at your favourite resort. Enjoy!

I don't think it's petty at all - it is something we have employed with our more "iffy" guests from time to time. The points/accommodations are within your gift to use how you wish. Given the rather robust points rental market, I am not sure how you deciding to "rent" your points for maintenance fees (or whatever calculation you use) is any different.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

So if it's worked numerous times before why do you suddenly have the thought "without something on the line, I don’t think there is a sense of commitment or responsibility for bailing last minute." Doesn't seem like that is true or you simply were willing to take the risk with other people and no you can't know that those other people wouldn't have canceled last minute either, things happen, life happens. It was always 100% a possibility.

I understand why people make the conversation about how non-DVC members couldn't possibly know xyz but you as the DVC owner are equally responsible for understanding what it means to invite others along. You hold the cards on how you choose to handle it.

Some choose to charge this person but not those persons, some say you pick up a meal or two, some never want to make it transactional. But either way it's on you as the owner to determine how you want to deal with the points you have and it would have been something that you as the owner needed to be responsible for the moment you decided to invite others along.

 

[kristenrice]

I totally get it. I'm taking a trip this fall with my dad and my BFF. While we all get along just fine and the three of us would "fit" in a 1BR, we would feel much more comfortable in a 2BR. Since we are staying at AKV-Kidani, a 2BR will afford each of us our own private bathroom space as well. While I could have borrowed enough points to make the 2BR happen, I knew that if something came up and even one person backed out, the 2BR would be a complete waste. We came to the decision that we would figure out how much the total points for the reservation would be (268) and divided that by 3. Each of us is responsible to come up with about 90 points. Since I already own points, I needed to do a transfer for about 180 so I contacted my "friend" (long-time DIS-acquaintance who rarely uses her points and has a standing arrangement with us) and she sent me the points I needed. My dad and BFF now have some "skin in the game".

This is the way I typically "upgrade" any reservation I make when travelling with friends/family. If I would normally book a 1BR for, say myself and my DD, and I invite BFF to come along, I do not ask her for anything because I would have booked the 1BR anyways. If, however, DD and I are going to stay in a studio and BFF wants to stay in a 1BR, then I would ask her to pay for the additional points to transfer in for the upgrade. I am not willing to spend my own points for friends/family to come along, only to have them back out because they think that "it's just points".

 

[bwang123]

Sorry to hear, we have brought guests (mostly family) numerous times and never expected anything in return for the points. I never even considered them skipping out since there was a free room involved.

I know if the one time we booked OKW 2 bedroom for just four of us and the other 2 were no show's, we would have been upset about the point usage.

 

[4luv2cdisney]

I book individual studios for guests.
1) I don't like many other people enough to want them in my space 24/7.
2) Can cancel easier.
Yes you'd be in holding at this point, but at least you have a chance to rent or use them!

We are going in December on 3 studios. 1 for me, DH, and DD, 1 for other DD and BF, 1 for my in-laws. And it was about the same points for 3 studios than a 2 bedroom with people sleeping in the main area (defeating the purpose of that area IMO).

 

[Mollygirl21]

I prefer to do Disney with just my little family. Adding others to a Disney trip adds stress and complexity, in my view.

We like to cruise with other families, but even that is coming back on us this year - we planned a cruise around another family coming and booked a time we wouldn't normally travel but it was the only time they could go. Now they are backing out. It's frustrating

 

[Sandisw]

When I invite people to go, I go in with the mindset that they might bail in the end and that I may end up with a larger room than needed.

If it happens within 30 days, I still with it. If it happens outside of it, then I amend if I like my options or just go with the flow.

It can be frustrating because others don't understand the whole aspect of it. I am sure you will have a great time and might enjoy having more space!!!

 

[BaybeeYoda]

I charge family $10pp and friends $15pp. And they need to pay 31 days in advance. That way, no dropping out….

It’s still only $150-200/night for a room- a discount but not free….

 

[robinb]

So if it's worked numerous times before why do you suddenly have the thought "without something on the line, I don’t think there is a sense of commitment or responsibility for bailing last minute." Doesn't seem like that is true or you simply were willing to take the risk with other people and no you can't know that those other people wouldn't have canceled last minute either, things happen, life happens. It was always 100% a possibility.

I understand why people make the conversation about how non-DVC members couldn't possibly know xyz but you as the DVC owner are equally responsible for understanding what it means to invite others along. You hold the cards on how you choose to handle it.

Some choose to charge this person but not those persons, some say you pick up a meal or two, some never want to make it transactional. But either way it's on you as the owner to determine how you want to deal with the points you have and it would have been something that you as the owner needed to be responsible for the moment you decided to invite others along.

Way you kick the DVC owner when they're down. AFAIK, you don't own DVC and your response highlights exactly what the rest of us know: non-DVC people, such as yourself, really don't understand what it means when friends and family "flake out" and cancel causing us to waste points. Wasting points is the worst thing ever for DVC owners. Not only do you throw money away paying for dues for the points that didn't need to be used, but you also throw away another entire vacation that could have been booked with those points.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Way you kick the DVC owner when they're down. AFAIK, you don't own DVC and your response highlights exactly what the rest of us know: non-DVC people, such as yourself, really don't understand what it means when friends and family "flake out" and cancel causing us to waste points. Wasting points is the worst thing ever for DVC owners. Not only do you throw money away paying for dues for the points that didn't need to be used, but you also throw away another entire vacation that could have been booked with those points.

The thing is a lot of posters here like to kick the guests down.all.the.time. It's almost always with an air like other people are incompetent. Sure there's def. a component of not necessarily understanding a product but as an owner you also have to take on that risk yourself when you purchase said product and use it for other people.

Many posters across many threads are up front about how they treat it and in enough threads people will say things like "I would never charge for so and so to come" or "we always book what we're comfortable booking" or whatever.

For the OP what I picked up was this "it worked numerous times" and then they got burned once and so by that one time then it apparently negated all the prior experiences when that was very much the real possibility back then of backing out last minute. That is something the OP would have wanted to think about before all these numerous times, it was a ticking time bomb (and now they know this particular group may have last-minute issues in the future).

I wholeheartedly agree wasting points is awful but you can't blame the guests all the time for that. When you're the owner you have that control over how you extend the invite, how you set it up with the expectations and how you treat your guests. Ultimately it's your financial investment not others. It's also why people are very cautious about giving the advice about purchasing large contracts for the purpose of inviting others (which the OP didn't indicate they did) for the reason that you're taking on a potential long-term risk.

 

[sethschroeder]

I wouldn't book with someone who would bail like that. You may never know but they do that and likely I am not talking with them in the future unless they had a very significant reason.

One of the top things for me is saying what you mean and if you agree to something you do it.

 

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

So if it's worked numerous times before why do you suddenly have the thought "without something on the line, I don’t think there is a sense of commitment or responsibility for bailing last minute." Doesn't seem like that is true or you simply were willing to take the risk with other people and no you can't know that those other people wouldn't have canceled last minute either, things happen, life happens. It was always 100% a possibility.

Obviously a death in the family, sudden illness or accident could happen anytime and that’s something we always know is a possibility. With this particular situation it was none of those things and I am fairly confident they knew it was a potential more than 2 weeks ago. While I’m not mad at them and know this was a risk we accepted, it’s made me frustrated that we may have been able to save over 100 points had we been told just 2 weeks sooner. Because of that, I’m thinking we may need to approach things differently in the future.

I book individual studios for guests.

Yes! That’s one option we’ve thought about for future.

When I invite people to go, I go in with the mindset that they might bail in the end and that I may end up with a larger room than needed.

If it happens within 30 days, I still with it. If it happens outside of it, then I amend if I like my options or just go with the flow.

It can be frustrating because others don't understand the whole aspect of it. I am sure you will have a great time and might enjoy having more space!!!

Yes, I need a little more of this mindset for future.

 

[APiratesLifeForMe2]

I wouldn't book with someone who would bail like that. You may never know but they do that and likely I am not talking with them in the future unless they had a very significant reason.

One of the top things for me is saying what you mean and if you agree to something you do it.

Not to mention how long it would take us to get the points back again. This was a “put all our points in this basket” kind of trip.