I’m not imagining things, am I?

The way I understand it, your husband could get a second mortgage on your primary home without your consent and vice-versa for your rental property. Which seems to be the case with the OP -the husband secured a 2nd mortgage without her consent.
This is just incorrect. As someone said above, it is impossible in the US for one party to place debt on real property without consent of all owners. To do so otherwise would require serious fraud on behalf of the husband and the bank- I.e. someone would have to forge the wife’s name.

One person can guarantee the note, but all persons with ownership interest must execute the mortgage document. The note is the legal promise to pay. The mortgage is recorded as a matter of public record and provides the mechanism for the bank to recover the asset in the event of nonpayment.

I am not claiming that the husband is in the right here (none of us know what the truth is), but the OP must know about the second mortgage.
 
Even if two people are on the deed to a house if only one person is on the mortgage that one person can take out a home equity loan without needing the other owner's signature. The equity loan is based on eligibility so if one person is financially eligible to take it out you don't need the other's signatures.

Sure Google isn't always the best source but I'm finding this on multiple websites.

FWIW I was on the first mortgage of our house, and have been on the deed as well. The first re-finance only my husband was on the mortgage, second re-finance same. My signatures were never a consideration. Scratch that I did sign the first re-finance but did not on the second that I could find.

The deed has never been touched and still maintains both of us as owners.

This seems to be possibly a state by state situation.
 
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it is impossible in the US for one party to place debt on real property without consent of all owners.
  • "In many cases, you can apply for a home equity loan or home equity line of credit (HELOC) without your spouse—but you might need their consent. Your home state might require lenders to get your spouse’s permission. This allows them to create a valid lien on your property, so they can foreclose on your loan if you don’t repay it."
  • If you are applying for individual credit in your own name, a creditor such as a lender or broker may not deny you credit because of your marital status. If you are creditworthy, you may get your own mortgage or home equity loan, and a lender or broker generally may not require that your spouse co-sign."
  • "Couples or co-homeowners do not have to get a home equity loan in both names if one borrower is able to qualify for favorable loan terms based on their creditworthiness alone. However, lenders can require the non-borrowing spouse to sign documentation consenting to the loan."

    Just a few of the snippets I found.
Def. not impossible nor a U.S. thing. State by state laws plus lender by lender it appears. It can be required that's true. It can be fraud if it is legally required and the husband is forging signatures. But it does not appear to be required at a Federal level nor on every state level nor ever lender level.
 
  • "In many cases, you can apply for a home equity loan or home equity line of credit (HELOC) without your spouse—but you might need their consent. Your home state might require lenders to get your spouse’s permission. This allows them to create a valid lien on your property, so they can foreclose on your loan if you don’t repay it."
  • If you are applying for individual credit in your own name, a creditor such as a lender or broker may not deny you credit because of your marital status. If you are creditworthy, you may get your own mortgage or home equity loan, and a lender or broker generally may not require that your spouse co-sign."
  • "Couples or co-homeowners do not have to get a home equity loan in both names if one borrower is able to qualify for favorable loan terms based on their creditworthiness alone. However, lenders can require the non-borrowing spouse to sign documentation consenting to the loan."

    Just a few of the snippets I found.
Def. not impossible nor a U.S. thing. State by state laws plus lender by lender it appears. It can be required that's true. It can be fraud if it is legally required and the husband is forging signatures. But it does not appear to be required at a Federal level nor on every state level nor ever lender level.
<edited>

OP, as an attorney with 28 years of experience I suggest you you step away from this board. You need to speak with a qualified attorney. Don’t t listen to me or anyone else on this because the above quote is the type of nonsense you will get
 
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@WDWDCLDLFAN - since you know all these things (2nd mortgage on a house you jointly own**, private investments/accounts, travelling independently to investigate a new job/relocation) have you tried asking him directly what’s going on? If it appeared my entire life was teetering on the brink of MAJOR disruption, that would probably be what I’d do...:rolleyes1

** For the DIS financial experts - I find this very odd. How does one party secure an independent loan against a jointly-held asset without the signature of the other? I alone hold the title to and am named on the mortgage on our home. Being as my husband has dower rights even without being on title, he must sign off on any sale or encumbrance on the property. No bank would let me pull out the equity without that. :confused:

Some of this is based on the state you live in and where the property is. In my state it is perfectly fine for one party to get a loan in only their name on a jointly held property however there is a form that needs signed by the other party acknowledging they are 1) aware of the debt and 2) accepting the lien. I did this myself with a HELOC because we didn't need my wife's income to factor into the decision and it was less paperwork.

It can also happen if one spouse owns the home already when they get married. My wife was added to my title but I didn't even know her when I took out the initial mortgage so she isn't on it. If I also already had a HELOC I would be able to take additional draws against it without needing anything signed by my wife.

The OP post sounds like the husband is up to something shady.
 
I edited my post because others, especially @Sanchez have told you to call an attorney. But I would also suggest that you contact a therapist. To suddenly turn the tables after 23 years of marriage is going to take its toll on you mentally. The lawyer is to protect your assets, the therapist is to protect YOU.
Excellent point/advice and well said!
 
Quick reply until I have more time:

Yes he told me about the heloc, under the guise of “investing it for our future”. He knows that I don’t agree with this, but apparently the bank (a major commercial bank) is ok without my signature. No closing yet, I suppose that will tell.

Of course I’ve asked him what the heck is going on with all of this. He accused me of not trusting him (I told him, how can I trust when you won’t show me everything?).

I had a quick opportunity to speak with a lawyer today. I’m following his advice re paper work, paper trails, etc.

More when I can.
Thanks to all for comments so far! 🙏🏼
 
You suspect something is wrong and there probably is, everything sounds sketch.

Stop the loan, call the bank and stop it then call an attorney on the down low. Also make an appointment at the IRS and check your taxes, don't ask DH and expect truth if you don't trust him. If he is in trouble he may lie, just go to IRS and they will give you a printout. You are liable for his mistakes :/

Did you sign off on the home equity loan? No matter, if the house is also yours so you can pull the plug. If he buys another home with it you will be stuck. Happened to a friend but her DH bought a boat and lived on it calling it his home while the family home went into foreclosure because of his debts and poor management, the jerk.

Whether there is someone else or if he just lost everything and is trying to get house money this won't end well.
He'll be mad, so what, better him than you.
 
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