How to Plan a Trip for Multi-Age Kids? (4 year age gaps)

[Amanda_MomingAbout]

We've been talking Disney for a bit now and are thinking of booking next year (and a trip to Legoland). My kids will be 12 (boy), 8 (boy), and 4 (girl). We don't really want to wait too much long for our first ever trip because then we miss "kiddie" the magic with our oldest (if you know what I mean) but how do you plan a trip with such various age gaps and limitations on who can do what? I thought of trying to squeeze another adult into the mix (our treat) just to help alleviate some of this stress. Lol. Thoughts?

 

[srwarden1928]

The larger your group, the more difficult and time consuming keeping together, regardless of ages involved. With your size of family, I would suggest planning to split up at times. One parent taking one or two kids, the other parent the remaining one or two kids. You could then meet up periodically, do certain things together such as meals or some rides, then split up again, perhaps in different combinations.

 

[BaymaxForever]

My kids are 4yrs apart-girl and boy. I’ve been to Cinderella’s royal table 2x with my dgtr- husband and son have never been. During that time they just do ‘guy stuff’ or whatever my son wants to do. Last trip I had an appt for my son at the Pirates League (he just turned 9), but he ended up not wanting to go. He wanted to do Tomorrowland speedway with his dad again and that’s what they did and he was happy.

Another time, my dgtr and I wanted to do the great movie ride, but my son wanted to watch the Star Wars stage show, again. We went to the GMR and they watched the show from the front row and they met the characters at the launch Bay afterwards...he loved it and was a great experience for him, even though it wasn’t in ‘my’ ‘touring plan.’ (Plus it was his actual BDay!).

If you try to make some simple plans beforehand where you separate for a short time or just make a decision on the fly, I think you can find and do things that appeal to everyone and that what they want to do is included in some way.

 

[Amanda_MomingAbout]

I was actually just considering this. There are some things my husband and my sons would be more interested in than I would and that my daughter would probably not even be able to do. I was thinking that we would just have to plan our days (separate) based on that. Some parks seem more little kid friendly than others and I'd assume we'd be more likely to be together in those parks.

 

[Ava]

My kids are both girls, but are also 4 years apart (8 & 4). We spent most of our time together on our trip this summer, but did split up sometimes when it made sense. For example, in Hollywood Studios I took my 8yo to ride Tower of Terror while my wife & 4yo rode Toy Story Mania and met Buzz & Woody. We met back up at Rockin Rollercoaster so my wife & I could take turns riding that with our 8yo. Thankfully the 4yo was content to look around the gift shops or sit somewhere & play with a toy for the time it took us to do Rider Swap.

If you haven’t already, read up on the Rider Swap policy. It’s available on any ride that has a height requirement and will allow the other 4 of you to get on rides your 4-year-old isn’t tall enough for without too much extra waiting.

 

[Travelstovegas]

I guess I have a little bit of a different take on it. I'm not opposed to doing some things separate but I wouldn't want to spend lots of time apart since part of the point of doing Disney together is doing Disney *together*! So I'd look at it as just another aspect of family life where compromises have to be made - perhaps everyone picks their top 2 or top 3 "must-do" items for each park, and you all do your best to accommodate those items, and anything else is just 'extra fun'. If someone is not tall enough, then go for the Rider Swap pass. Sure, your 12 year old & 8 year old might roll their eyes a bit at getting a photo with Rapunzel while your daughter is star-struck, but that's just what families do sometimes. And then she'll maybe have to wait a bit while the two older ones ride a bigger ride - it's a trade off. But it teaches everyone that it's not always about your own happiness - it's about seeing the people you love be happy too.

I'm not suggesting you never separate, but I am saying don't feel guilty or stressed that everyone isn't fully entertained every second of the day. As a parent, I get a lot of joy from watching my kids experience things. For me, personally, I wouldn't want to spend my vacation mostly with my daughter while my husband spent his time with our son, because not only would we be missing out on family time together, but I'd be missing out on seeing my son's reactions, and my husband would be missing out on seeing our daughter's excitement. And, in the bigger picture of life, there's really not that many years for family vacations anyway.

 

[Surgie2]

I guess I have a little bit of a different take on it. I'm not opposed to doing some things separate but I wouldn't want to spend lots of time apart since part of the point of doing Disney together is doing Disney *together*!

This is my take as well. We have four grandkids closer in age (ages 13 months - 5 1/2 at time of visit) including a grandson who could not care less about princesses. But we are still all going to CRT and will do the meet and greets for as many characters as the kids want. The only thing (other than rider swap for kids too short or too scared) we have intentionally planned to split up on is Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique for the two 5 year old girls. And of course, if some kids are too tired and cranky some can go back to the resort while others stay. But I'm planning the FP for all together each day since there is so much in each park the whole family can enjoy.

 

[Ava]

I guess I have a little bit of a different take on it. I'm not opposed to doing some things separate but I wouldn't want to spend lots of time apart since part of the point of doing Disney together is doing Disney *together*! So I'd look at it as just another aspect of family life where compromises have to be made - perhaps everyone picks their top 2 or top 3 "must-do" items for each park, and you all do your best to accommodate those items, and anything else is just 'extra fun'. If someone is not tall enough, then go for the Rider Swap pass. Sure, your 12 year old & 8 year old might roll their eyes a bit at getting a photo with Rapunzel while your daughter is star-struck, but that's just what families do sometimes. And then she'll maybe have to wait a bit while the two older ones ride a bigger ride - it's a trade off. But it teaches everyone that it's not always about your own happiness - it's about seeing the people you love be happy too.

I'm not suggesting you never separate, but I am saying don't feel guilty or stressed that everyone isn't fully entertained every second of the day. As a parent, I get a lot of joy from watching my kids experience things. For me, personally, I wouldn't want to spend my vacation mostly with my daughter while my husband spent his time with our son, because not only would we be missing out on family time together, but I'd be missing out on seeing my son's reactions, and my husband would be missing out on seeing our daughter's excitement. And, in the bigger picture of life, there's really not that many years for family vacations anyway.

This is pretty much how we handled it. We ate all of our meals together & spent the majority of our time in the parks together, only splitting up for short periods of time when DD8 wanted to ride a ride that DD4 was either too short for or that we knew she'd be too scared on (like Tower of Terror). In those cases we planned a nearby ride or character meet that one parent could take DD4 to while the other parent rode the big ride with DD8, so DD4 wouldn't spend as much of her time just waiting. She did just wait sometimes though, and sometimes DD8 had to "suffer" through rides she wasn't interested in (like Dumbo) or stand off to the side while DD4 met a character she didn't care to see. We stuck together as much as possible though, because I agree with you that family vacations are about spending time all together as a family.

 

[themouseandme]

This is pretty much how we handled it. We ate all of our meals together & spent the majority of our time in the parks together, only splitting up for short periods of time when DD8 wanted to ride a ride that DD4 was either too short for or that we knew she'd be too scared on (like Tower of Terror). In those cases we planned a nearby ride or character meet that one parent could take DD4 to while the other parent rode the big ride with DD8, so DD4 wouldn't spend as much of her time just waiting. She did just wait sometimes though, and sometimes DD8 had to "suffer" through rides she wasn't interested in (like Dumbo) or stand off to the side while DD4 met a character she didn't care to see. We stuck together as much as possible though, because I agree with you that family vacations are about spending time all together as a family.

 

[powellrj]

We have a huge age difference with my kids. There are 14 years between my oldest and youngest and then I have one in the middle. We would always split up in the morning and meet for lunch and spend the rest of the day together. If you get there at rope drop, its amazing how many rides you can get done, so it leaves the afternoon to take it slower.

 

[TwinkleKS]

We do it all together 99% of the time. We have gone from ages 70+ on down. The "kids" start at 21 and go down. By the time you hit 7 or 8 you can ride even the majority of the height requirement rides (if you wanted to). There is nostalgia in the "slower" rides even for the bigger kids.

 

[Lvsdisney]

Utilize Rider Swap where available. For example, Big Kids and your SO ride Space Mountain (with FP+) and get YOU a Rider Swap pass (if 4 year old is too short, which is likely). Later, before the Rider Swap pass expires, You and the big kids (I think up to 3 people can join the RS pass holder) ride Space Mountain by going through the FP+ line (handing the CM the RS Pass). While they're on space mountain, you and 4 year old could do astro orbiter or tea party, people mover, etc.

 

[tzolkin]

For our first trip my oldest was 9 and the two younger ones were nearly 4 and nearly 2. (Now the oldest is in college, younger two in middle school.)

We chose to stay together 95% of the time (including mid-day naps at the resort). We were there to enjoy time together and almost everything at Disney can be enjoyed by all ages.

My oldest always saw her siblings as an excuse to do all the “little kid” things that she really enjoyed. And, staying with them throughout the day also allowed her to get to ride twice on all the “big” attractions because we used rider switch.

For the first few annual trips I planned one evening (usually late night at MK) with my oldest. It was great for some mother-daughter bonding and an opportunity for her to choose what she wanted to do without having to think about the younger ones. DH would stay at the resort with the younger two to swim and get to bed early.

 

[ajwolfe]

My boys are 3 1/2 years apart but it's never really been an issue at Disney. For the most part we just stay together and if someone doesn't want to ride something or couldn't because of size then they just waited or did something else there in the surrounding area. There are so many things at Disney that everyone can do I feel like this will be less of an issue than you think.
Also, have to agree with the pp that said they try to stick together as much as possible. This. It's a family trip and a great opportunity to teach compromise, etc.

 

[momto2js]

We are a divide and concur family and mine are only 2 years apart. We do a lot together, but well my oldest isn't going to happily wait 45 minutes in line for peter pan any more. But we have been many times. I think you may be OK at disney, but LEGOLAND may be a different story. For my family, there is no reason at all to pay for my 11 year old to go except for the "play with lego's" area" and he can do that free at the lego store.

 

[piglet1979]

My kids are 10 (girl) and 11 (boy). We do everything we can together. However My daughter and myself do not ride the big rides. At DHS the boys go off to RnR and Tower of Terror while my daughter and I do what she wants. Sometimes we watch the shows in the streets or sometimes we rides the rides she wants (except Star Wars because i won't do that). We rode Toy Story like 4 times in a row once waiting on the boys. Other times My daughter any I saw some princesses while the boys did something or another.

Even though there is a a gap between your kids there will still be a ton you can do together. Splitting up for a few things would be ok. If it is a ride that both parents want to do and your little one can't ride you can always get a rider switch.

 

[QueenIsabella]

We have 4 over an 11-year span. We are the kings of splitting up at WDW. I don't understand families who think they must stay together at all costs. We haven't been recently but I have a girl, 20 m later a boy...6 year gap...a girl, 3 years later, another boy. So, it's almost like raising two sets of two. What we did when the younger two were fairly small was, we'd do the more "kiddie" rides in the morning, then one parent would take them to nap, while the other stayed and did "adult" rides with the older two. As everyone aged, the splitting up was different--my older son HATES any kind of thrill ride--even Big Thunder is too much for him. Meanwhile, his younger brother has literally ridden Big Thunder a dozen times in a row. Older son either sits out alone, or with a parent (we do this for other stuff, too, like Mission:Space). Generally, I stay with him, maybe get him a snack.

I also have each child pick their one "must do" in each park. The point is to avoid "punishing" the older ones, by making them sit through 8 rounds of Small World, or "punish" the younger ones, by not having them sit out while their siblings ride Space Mountain. It's all about balance. I also find the older ones are more tolerant when they know their turn is coming.