I have few words for you,
@Hisgirl , but then again, words probably aren't what you need. I wish I could be with you, to just abide; let you pour it all out (and sometimes that means saying the same things over and over) or even just sitting in silence and holding your hand, so that you'd know you weren't alone. I'd reply to your middle-of-the-night texts, if even just with an emoji, so you'd always feel like you had a place to land. I would purpose, for a period of time, to never be "too busy". I've had occasion over the years to learn many things about coming alongside loved ones in their grief. The most important one is to simply "show up". Many people, I'm sure, love you and want to show you they care; they just truly don't know how, or are afraid they'll be clumsy and say something that makes it worse. If you can, try to reach out and let them know what you need. I'm praying over you and yours
And although I am very sensitive to mental health struggles, I would agree with you that it's not a given that you are "depressed". You have a broken heart - it's not the same thing. Grace and peace.
Well this made me cry. 'I wish I could be with you, to just abide....."
I need this so much. I'm a quiet, shy type gal and have formed many tight, close, long-term relationships. One moved to Florida, one moved to Texas, one died, another died, and all the others are swamped with work and grandchildren. But gosh, oh golly, do I need someone to 'abide'.
We're all so busy these days, aren't we? Keeping up with facebook and instagram and the latest screen, but our friends? Not so much.
I used to call my two closest friends, in the midst of trauma events with my parents, and say "I need you to tell me this isn't going to go on forever. I just need to hear those words." It was a season of honor, but a season that was dealt out in minutes, one long minute at a time, full of emergency phone calls, falls, hospital runs in the middle of the night, bathroom accidents, broken bones, falls and falls and more falls. Fifty phone calls in one day.
This has made my heart so sensitive to those in the same care-giving place. For the love of all that is good and holy, if you know a care-giver, reach out. Take them to lunch, give them a massage gift card. Know that they could be holding onto a fraying rope. Now, instead of saying "How's your Mama?".... I say, "How are YOU doing?"
I actually want to come down to disney world. But my chest isn't ready yet. Still healing. Instagram reels are making me laugh and I'm checking out books from the library to read on my kindle. I do think volunteering would be good.
I'm thinking of counseling. I did get some but in the midst of us talking, she said, "Do you have a graduate degree in counseling?" That's the issue. I do. And I know all the questions to ask and what the answers should be. So I counsel myself in the conversations. Hoe out that root and examine it. Forgive and seek healing.
Truly ...thank you all just for letting me poke open a hole and let out some of this that has holed up. It certainly does help.
