Do you know people like this?

[threecrazykids]

I'm going to break down and admit it. I'm one of these people...kind of. ONLY when it comes to my in-laws though. And my husband feels the EXACT same way about his own family. Basically what it boils down to is this...it's not that we DON'T have the money...it's that we don't WANT to do these "get togethers" with them. So my husband doesn't have the guts to just come out and say it...so he just says we don't have the money. But then they whine and throw a fit and say they will pay for us if that makes us go. Ok FINE, we'll go. But it's plain and simple...we have better things (like Disney) to save our money for...and sitting with my in-laws who do nothing but fight and argue and ignore the kids that they were just "dying to spend time with"...honestly...I won't spend a dollar of my money on time spent with them.

Finally my SIL called out my husband and said the same things you were wishing you'd say...like..."don't give me that crap that you don't have the money because you guys are going to Disney AGAIN". At which he replied "exactly...I want to spend my money on things that my kids will enjoy, not sit around and listen to my entire family argue...not quite getting my money's worth SIS!!"

They've never brought up the money thing since
I know it sounds harsh, but seriously...if you knew my SIL and MIL you'd know why I'm evil about it. But I am NOT like that with anyone else.

 

[rockyroad]

Some people have different priorities than we do and some are just ocnfused.

We got started going to WDW when my daughters were competiton cheerleaders in high school.
And we learned how to do WDW and have fun without spending too much money.

Now if we want to talk about expensive... competition cheerleading is expensive. To make it possible we made do and did without. It was important to the girls, so it was important to us. I knew that when my girls got older they wouldn't look back and think that mom couldn't afford cheer, but could afford a new car or new furniture or whatever. I could have had a new kitchen or a new car, but those things were not my priorities. The 10 year old chevy and the yard sale furniture were good enough.

I remember one girl who really enjoyed cheerleading, but her mom said that it was too expensive, they couldn't afford for her to do it, and she had to drop out of cheer the next year.
Yes many people actually can't afford it, but this family was living in a very expensive new house and driving a very very expensive new truck.

It also reminds me of something I heard Garrison Keeler say. He was talking about people who spend $50,000 on a new truck and then worry that they spent too much on the $500 piano they bought for their kid.
We all make many choices and sometimes other people are hard to understand.

 

[delmar411]

my IL's say it is too expensive to visit the kids. Complain how they don't see then enough. etc etc but are going to WDW again this year(they go on the EXPENSIVE plans) and hit the casinos every chance they get. Their house is falling down around their heads but no money to fix that. But plenty of money for expensive cars! Angry doesn't even cover how it makes DH feel. But then they tell us that they do all this crap because "they can". Because they did w/o for so long...blah blah blah. Yeah only getting to go to Disney 1x per year is just true suffering

I'll stop now because I start to get worked up about this.

 

[shortbun]

I have no problem with people who don't prioritize like I do. I guess "we can't afford it" might be a good alternative to "we don't want to go with you." lol! I just can't judge people based on how they spend their money. I don't like people judging me either. I envy people who don't spend much and have big bank accounts. I wish I could do that!!!

 

[theprincess]

I have a friend like that and it makes me sick!!!!

 

[runwad]

I'm going to break down and admit it. I'm one of these people...kind of. ONLY when it comes to my in-laws though. And my husband feels the EXACT same way about his own family. Basically what it boils down to is this...it's not that we DON'T have the money...it's that we don't WANT to do these "get togethers" with them. So my husband doesn't have the guts to just come out and say it...so he just says we don't have the money. But then they whine and throw a fit and say they will pay for us if that makes us go. Ok FINE, we'll go. But it's plain and simple...we have better things (like Disney) to save our money for...and sitting with my in-laws who do nothing but fight and argue and ignore the kids that they were just "dying to spend time with"...honestly...I won't spend a dollar of my money on time spent with them.

Finally my SIL called out my husband and said the same things you were wishing you'd say...like..."don't give me that crap that you don't have the money because you guys are going to Disney AGAIN". At which he replied "exactly...I want to spend my money on things that my kids will enjoy, not sit around and listen to my entire family argue...not quite getting my money's worth SIS!!"

They've never brought up the money thing since
I know it sounds harsh, but seriously...if you knew my SIL and MIL you'd know why I'm evil about it. But I am NOT like that with anyone else.

Oh I so totally get this but it's the IL's & My family, although noone has ever offered to pay our way yet so I guess they don't want to be with us that much either.

 

[tripletvan]

Do you know my brother-in law?

 

[momof296&02]

I don't necessarily think these people have all the money they spend- they are most likely living on credit. I too know many people who live large & then complain they can't do something. I've noticed with a few that some of the things they claim they can't afford to do involve paying for with cash- for instance so & so has theatre tix would you like to buy them from her? Just my opinion.

PS- I am really becoming addicted to these boards. It seems that laundry isn't getting done as often as it did pre disboards!

 

[vhoffman]

I have a slightly different vent. People who almost brag about how little money they have. They say things like "well, we could never afford a vacation to WDW", or "must be nice to be able to afford a new tv", etc, "We certainly couldn't afford to eat at such restaurants". Almost seems like they're in some sort of competetion about how little money they have, sort of like the OT. I never could figure out what they meant by that--I wouldn't brag about how little I had

 

[HelenePA]

My best friend is "one of those people" she is in the middle of a divorce, but continues to go on and on about how hard is it to make all the bills yadda yadda yadda... yet keeps going out and buying more boyds bears, yankee candles, 350$ pieces of furniture all with cash mind you... if you really think your that "bad" off STOP SPENDING MONEY!!!!!!!!!! I also do the I'm too poor to go places thing... but most of the time we ARE poor, not poor but just dont have the extra money! She doesn't get that I dont want to jump on ever chance she offers to go to the gap and spend 250$ on more clothes for my kids. I'll go to the Gap outlet, I've already got my little boys clothes bought for next fall/winter all name brand... all under 5$ a piece... she doesn't have the "time" to do it... cut me a break...

 

[VacationDad]

I "hate" the co-worker with two large incomes who acts like he can relate to my single income situation.

When your family is making $130,000 a year having both parents work, don't cry poverty to the guy with the stay at home wife.

 

[keishashadow]

yes I totally understand. I have family members like this and sometimes they make me so mad I have to bite my tongue. They have no money but they eat out all the time, buy all kinds of things they don't need, have remodeled everyroom and their house. They brag about everything they have and how much it costs which makes it worse. Timeshares and new cars with every gizmo you can imagine. It was so bad at one point I would start to ask what new thing do they have now. Yet they continue to say we have no money we need to cut corners. Oh well enough venting but I totally know how it makes everyone feel. I almost start feeling like I don't measure up.

I was with 'ya until you mentioned timeshares .

For some of us, who want to stay @ deluxe WDW resorts; it is a good deal. We ran the figures, scrimped & saved to pay cash for our small resale & add-on. With Disney currently raising hotel rooms nearly 10% year; figure we've made a good investment. Even though I'm too stingy with my points to pay for weekend days @ DVC, we just implement a split stay & head to other resort rooms or offsite. Glad the bulk of our accommodations are basically paid for; plus as a member perc we currently get $100 pp off the AP rates. Very cost effective if you can work in a few or even 2 trips within a 12 month period.

Have enjoyed reading this thread .

 

[jjj444]

What about when they claim they are poor but won't get a job?

 

[deanainnc]

I know this one couple, my dd is friends with their dd's. They get paid the last day of each month. They both work have 2 dd's. The church we attend was having our fall festivel on Oct. 31 (which was a Tuesday last year and also this couples payday) they came to the our preacher wanting to know if the church could give them $200 because they just got paid and they were $200 short on paying their bills. Well the church gave the money. And get this, this was Tuesday night they were out of money and begging money from the church and on Saturday (4 days later) I saw them sitting at the McDonald's drive thru. I got so upset. We pay our tithes and these people are getting them going to McDonald's with it. We don't eat out, because we chose a couple of years ago to get out of debt, mortgage included, so we can retire in a couple of years were both 38 and set our goals. But these people can't ever afford anything and eating out.

 

[hsmamato2]

haven't read all posts yet, but we all know people like this. If we really do like them,in spite of their spending habits,then we say nothing,and expect to foot the bill when we see them. Why? b/c their friendship,however flawed,is that valuable to us...now if we don't like them all that much,we tend to stay away from them,b/c it just ain't worth it....

 

[DawnM]

What they are really saying is that it isn't important to them and tney would prefer to spend their money in a different way.

There isn't anything you can do about it. It is their choice.

Dawn

 

[Pixiedust34]

I "hate" the co-worker with two large incomes who acts like he can relate to my single income situation.

When your family is making $130,000 a year having both parents work, don't cry poverty to the guy with the stay at home wife.

My dh is one of the only people (or maybe even the only person) at work who supports his family of four on his one income. I can relate to your post.

 

[Darcy03231]

I have to agree with Dawn, its all about choices. Some people like to drive new cars, have new clothes all the time and eat out several times a week and others like to save and go on trips. Both DH and I are lucky enough to both have very good salaries. While we live frugally, no one in our family has needs that are unmet. We choose to live this way so that we can travel, which is what we enjoy. Instead of a large eating out, clothing, stuff budget, we have a large travel budget.

 

[poohbear158]

I think you must have met my in-laws... lol. They are always crying the blues about money, but go to the grocery store and don't use coupons don't have any kind of budget, don't save one dime that they have etc... it drives me crazy

They are always saying " We can't afford this" We can't afford that" " I wish we had that kind of money" etc.etc. etc. But their eating out at least 2 meals a day every day that comes, I mean the whole family is eating out. They have every cable channel on the planet. They are always sporting new outfits. If their car gets a little skip in the motor they trade it in and get a new one. But these same people if you try and get a couple of families together for an outing they won't go because they say they don't have the money, but if some one offers to take care of the bill for them their the first ones wanting to go. Then the next day you see them piling out of the car the pizza place for supper, but just the night before they had no money.

Am I the only one that can not stand this.

 

[kcork1026]

They are always saying " We can't afford this" We can't afford that" " I wish we had that kind of money" etc.etc. etc. But their eating out at least 2 meals a day every day that comes, I mean the whole family is eating out. They have every cable channel on the planet. They are always sporting new outfits. If their car gets a little skip in the motor they trade it in and get a new one. But these same people if you try and get a couple of families together for an outing they won't go because they say they don't have the money, but if some one offers to take care of the bill for them their the first ones wanting to go. Then the next day you see them piling out of the car the pizza place for supper, but just the night before they had no money.

Am I the only one that can not stand this.

Hey do you know my brother and his wife???????