Companion bathrooms question?

[SueM in MN]

The Disboards in general have been hugely educational to me, also. I always thought I was a very understanding, empathetic person but have grown much more humble and learn more every day. It's all personal growth, and hey, at least we are open to the learning! Many choose to remain ignorant or else lack our giant source of personal anecdotes.

Beth

My DH thought he knew a lot about dealing with disabilities from living with a DD who is disabled.
Then he hurt his foot a few years ago and had to use a wheelchair and crutches for about 2 weeks. He found out all sorts of things he didn't realize before.
Like stuff about the bathroom that he had been laughing at me about before - since I'm the one who has to take care of DD most of the time, there were lots of things I deal with that he didn't have a clue about. He now thinks EVERYONE should be required to spend a week (or at least a few days) simulating some kind of disability. And, not just at home - out in the community where they can see how things really are.

 

[taximomfor4]

My DH thought he knew a lot about dealing with disabilities from living with a DD who is disabled.
Then he hurt his foot a few years ago and had to use a wheelchair and crutches for about 2 weeks. He found out all sorts of things he didn't realize before.
Like stuff about the bathroom that he had been laughing at me about before - since I'm the one who has to take care of DD most of the time, there were lots of things I deal with that he didn't have a clue about. He now thinks EVERYONE should be required to spend a week (or at least a few days) simulating some kind of disability. And, not just at home - out in the community where they can see how things really are.

I can definitely see the value in that. I did my time over summer vacation in high school one year. But even then, I only got experience being mobility-challenged and in pain. I have only recently begun gaining experience with a sensory-challenged child with motor delay. Disabilities sure run the gamut.

 

[LMC]

So what's the verdict? Do I take my almost 11 yo special needs son to the regular ladies room (he is mobile) or do we use the companion room. My DH almost never takes him to the toilet when he has a BM so that is my job so he will almost always be with me. I will probably never let him go to a mens room unescorted (he is borderline MR also) as you never know when a perv is lurking around.
For the most part, we used the ladies room this last trip (12/22 - 1/1) but on occasion, I saw the companion room and used it when I was with him.

Oh, and when my 5 yo son is screaming that he has to go pee, and there is a line at the ladies room, and DH isn't around to take, him, we will use the companion room for all of about 30 seconds. It's either that or he pees on the ground 'cause he isn't going in his pants.

 

[Talking Hands]

I would either use the companion restroom or the first aide center to change him. Not all companion bathrooms have changing tables or ones that are easy to use with a larger stall. First aide would be better for that.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

Ok I have to ask: why won't your husband take him to the men's room?

 

[LMC]

He will take him if he only has to urinate. But DS has some gastero issues and always has loose stools which is very messy. DH just does not get into cleaning up after him, yells at him, etc cause "he isn't having too much fun" helping him. It's just better for my son if I help him. DH will take him if the line in the ladies room is too long and what not. Oh, and when DS needs to vomit, I get that duty too.

Ok I have to ask: why won't your husband take him to the men's room?

 

[LindsayDunn228]

Sounds like your husband is a real gem. Sorry, I wouldn't have that for a husband.

 

[SueM in MN]

A reminder - personal attacks are not allowed.
Disagreement is, but personally attacks on a poster or a member of their family is going over the line.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

Sorry, was just an opinion. It made me very angry.

 

[Nik's Mom]

This subject came up here before, and thanks to you wonderful people, we now use the companion restrooms. I had assumed that my son's condition wouldn't be acceptable to use those restrooms (he's autistic). We both would squeeze into the regular little stalls, struggling to get him unzipped, etc. His autism comes along with fine motor skill issues that prevent him from being able to go to the restroom alone. It was to the point where we just couldn't fit into one stall anymore. Thanks to you all, we now know it is perfectly o.k. to use the companion and disabled stalls, and that has made things so much easier. Once again, the great people of the DISabilities board have come through when needed!