Any cancer experts out there?

[ilovetexas]

Your Nana is a beautiful woman with such a happy smile!! Keep the cruise. She's looking forward to it. You have no control over how much time she has left, but you can control what you do with it; and she wants to spend it with you on a cruise.

I lost my father to cancer five years ago and if I could go back and take him to see the tulips in Holland that he always wanted to see, I would. You're doing something very special for your Nana.

Prayers for you and your family.

 

[kalc12345]

Nana is more then my Nana. She is my best friend, my mentor, my hero. She is the closest person to me in all my 28 years. We are truly as close as you can be. It's killing me that she has to experience something so scary and I can't take it away.

Your relationship with your Nana sounds just like mine with my Grandmother...we call her Nanny. I will sure be praying for her and the family during this time. Also praying that you guys will be able to take the cruise and make some wonderful memories!!

 

[tweetybebe]

Hi Laura,

Just like everyone else, I am sorry for your family to have to go through all this. I am an internist (on my lunch break) and has a few advice for you.
If your nana is in sound mind and fully understands what is going on and chose no further treatment, it is in her right to decide that no matter how sad it is for you or your family. In my experience, it seems that she is OK with it and had made peace with the situation. She might even embrace death when the time comes especially if she is religious.

As for your question, no one can tell you how the next 29 days is going to go. She can go downhill very fast or she will be fine for another 6 months. It is great that she is looking forward for the trip and it kept her busy. A positive attitude is always good for any illness. I learn to understand that sometimes situation like this, further treatment might make the end of her journey miserable as compare to being happy until the end. My advice is to concentrate in preparing for the cruise and if something happens in the mean time, deal with it then. The memory of her happily enjoying the preparation for the cruise is just as important as the cruise itself.

One question though, in your post, you stated that you are taking a 3 hours bus instead of flying due to the fear of blood clot. This makes no sense to me at all. Cancer puts people in a high clotting risk to start with and the increase risk of blood clot due to travel has all to do with mobility. If you sit without moving for a long time, it is easier for blood to clot, esp. in her leg veins. Given that, it would make more sense to me that you fly rather than taking the bus. Obviously if your flight is 10 hours long, there is a risk but as long as you get up and walk around every 30 minutes or so, that should be fine. Taking a bus ride for 3 hours sitting there, to me, is much higher risk for blood clot than flying 1 hour.

Lastly, did your nana and you talk to the doctor regarding comfort care? Especially when she will be going on a cruise, you might want to ask and be taught about some Morphine preparation so that if she takes the turn for the worse, you might be able to make her last moment in life more comfortable. This might sound ridiculous but is really not that hard. However, the ship doctor might be able to help in that regards. Having said that, you might want to alert DCL regarding your nanna's condition so that the ship doctor is prepared.

Hope this help and wish you all the best. Please let me know if further assistance is needed.

 

[tiggerb]

My heart goes out to you... My SIL now in her final weeks of life after living 7 years beyond the expectancy. I wish she desired to go and do something or want to feel the sun shine on her for even 5 minutes, and even my In-laws say this is not what she needs right now. They are in denial of all of this.

Anyways, I say go for it, but maybe consider moving it up since someone already posted, once pain takes over, the morphine increases as well as the need for oxygen and care. My SIL has fluid in her lung and her breathing is very labored and little movement takes her breath away. DH carried her from her bedroom to the Living room to her hospital bed that arrived and needless to say, she was out of breath and breathing harder. That would be my concern and having enough of the morphine and break-thru morphine on hand.

And, will she be able to handle a 3 hour ride if her pain and/breathing changes? My SIL couldn't handle 40 minute car ride or sitting for 1 hour (but her cancer has progressed into her bones and such) and this was before hospice came in.

Either way... I am glad she is wanting to have fun, make memories, and enjoy her family. If she can't make the cruise, make a Disney party/adventure at home w/ the rest of the family... put on Mickey Ears, vacation shirts, and more... lots of photos too! I am keeping you in my prayers and that your grandma keeps strength for at least 4 months, if not more! to you.

 

[minniemouse86]

I am so very sorry for what you and your family is going thru. Nothing any of us can say will take away all your sadness but we can distract you for a while. My Mother also had lung cancer and died December 15 1990. She kept telling us she had to get all the Christmas cards written and sent out as well as get Christmas presents for all us kids- even though we were all in our late 20s or 30s. She did all that and then peacefully passed away just like she wanted to. My father was in a nursing home and I lived out of state. He got very sick and the family wanted me to come but he said no wait until she visits at Christmas. I spent the day with him and two days later he passed. My point is that the human body will do very remarkable things if the minds wants it to. If Nana wants to go on the cruise and she has her mind set on it I bet she will go and have 1 heck of a time. You, Nana and your family are in my thoughts and prayers

 

[hollypt]

Laura,
I just wanted to say that your Nana is a beautiful lady, and I was moved reading about the relationship that you two have. I just said a prayer that her health will hold out and that you can make some wonderful memories.

 

[marciemouse]

My heart goes out to you. My mother passed away from cancer (started as cervical but spread all over) in early January 2005. Just a month earlier, in early December, we all made "one last trip" to WDW. Mom really wanted to go and see the parks decorated for Christmas. I won't lie; the trip was rough. She didn't do very well on the plane and was nauseous a lot. She only felt well enough to do one half day at the parks, and even that was in a wheel chair. However, I know she LOVED visiting Disney and the ocean one last time. I don't think she was in it to make new memories so much as to relive some old, happy memories. I pray that you and Nana have a wonderful cruise!

 

[MartDM]

Hi Laura!

I've been following your posts and wanted to say what a babe Nana is! I wish I had known my grandmothers and I'm so happy for you that you have forged such a tremendous relationship with her!

I lost my Dad to lung cancer and wanted to support those that recommend discussing it with her doctor. Things can either change quickly or stay rather static until the final weeks...based on her current health and the trends she has exhibited while under his/her treatment they can certainly let you know if you might need to move things up a bit. If they don't feel it's necessary, then enjoy the planning with her and let her enjoy the anticipating & allow it to distract her from her troubles!

I think we must be nearly neighbors...where are you? I hope you have a tremendous cruise!!!!

 

[HBEIC5A]

If the doctor clears her to travel, have a great time and cherish every single day. I know how hard it is. I lost my father just a short while ago from lung cancer.

 

[Jaxs27]

Let me tell you our story Laura. My husband was diagnosed in late July 2010 with glioblastoma grade 4. Glioblastoma is a primary terminal brain cancer and most people live 14 months beyond diagnosis. My husband had 2 brain surgeries, radiation, and chemo in the 1st year. We took a cruise for our anniversary last year thinking we wouldn't see another anniversary. In October of last year the doctor told us hopefully my husband would live through the holidays and put him under the care of hospice. In late February of this year my husband was released from hospice because frankly he was doing too well. Since we were celebrating another anniversary, we took another cruise. His recent MRI showed that the tumor had not only grown considerably, but had crossed the midline of the brain into the other side. We booked a Carnival cruise for mid May, then said what the heck let's jump on the Fantasy (son will turn 10 on cruise) before we come home. My husband never feels better than when he is on a cruise, and I truly believe that the anticipation keeps him going! Yes, I worry what could happen. But from day 1 we decided to not let the cancer control us. We have "lived" more in these last 2 years. So I guess what I am trying to say is go for it! Live without regrets, and I hope you all make a million memories with your Grandma! My best to your entire family!!!

Oh your post just brought me to tears. Good for you guys! My Dad died from a brain tumor in 2001, he was diagnosed in 1999 and was only given 6 months to live. My family traveled, he went fishing a lot, he loved the ocean, so we went there a lot during his last 2 years. It really was a great time and I have many memories from that time. I pray your husband keeps on going. Big hugs to you and your son, my brother was 15 when my Dad died and it was really hard, but he has gone on and done great things and never felt sorry for himself. My Dad really led by example.

 

[lmhall2000]

Let me tell you our story Laura. My husband was diagnosed in late July 2010 with glioblastoma grade 4. Glioblastoma is a primary terminal brain cancer and most people live 14 months beyond diagnosis. My husband had 2 brain surgeries, radiation, and chemo in the 1st year. We took a cruise for our anniversary last year thinking we wouldn't see another anniversary. In October of last year the doctor told us hopefully my husband would live through the holidays and put him under the care of hospice. In late February of this year my husband was released from hospice because frankly he was doing too well. Since we were celebrating another anniversary, we took another cruise. His recent MRI showed that the tumor had not only grown considerably, but had crossed the midline of the brain into the other side. We booked a Carnival cruise for mid May, then said what the heck let's jump on the Fantasy (son will turn 10 on cruise) before we come home. My husband never feels better than when he is on a cruise, and I truly believe that the anticipation keeps him going! Yes, I worry what could happen. But from day 1 we decided to not let the cancer control us. We have "lived" more in these last 2 years. So I guess what I am trying to say is go for it! Live without regrets, and I hope you all make a million memories with your Grandma! My best to your entire family!!!

Wow! What a journey and testament of the human spirit! Praying your son can share his birthday with Dad! Way to be a family...praying you all have a wonderful cruise!

 

[LauraEadon]

All of your replies are simply heartbreaking. I'm so sorry for all your losses.

Thank you everyone for your insight and thoughts on this difficult topic. They were extremely helpful, as my mind has been foggy since the news. I feel much better and am going to take a different view on it, after all, if Nana is so looking forward to this trip then I should!

28 days to go. I hope these 4 weeks fly by and Nana stays as she is now.

 

[renee123]

I pray for you and your family. I really hope you can take your trip. You Nana sounds like a wonderful woman. I was choked up when seeing her photo you posted.
I too have been dealt the blow of lung cancer when my mom was diagnosed about 6 months ago. Luckliy, She is stage 3 and doing very well just successfully completing her treatments but I think about her disease everyday. My aunt (her sister) died at a very young age from the disease so i know the heartache. I hope for the best for your family.

 

[pdwimmer]

This is an incredibly personal decision. I work in oncology research and see this day in and day out.

When my dad was diagnosed with gliobastoma last year that was inoperable I pushed my mom to take dad on his last vacation. She didn't want to because she thought it would be better for him to pass at home. I talked to him several times and he clearly wanted to be in a special place. He was not well enough to take a cruse. So we took him to the beach for a week in Tampa. He passed on Memorial Day. Hospice was able to take care of him while he was there and arranged for his transport home.

I am assuming Disney would be able to provide similar services if the unthinkable happens while on your cruise. They do have facilities onboard in case she passes.

Please be prepared that if she is extremely ill when you try to get home and she is not well enough to get on a commercial plane it will cost several thousand to get her home on a medical transport. I don't remember the exact amount, but it was around $12,000 when we realized dad wouldn't make it and arranged for emergency transport from Tampa to Kansas City. He passed 2 hours before the arranged pick up time.

My advice is to go for it and make the best of your last moments together. They are truly special. My prayers for you and your family.

 

[templed]

Go... enjoy yourselves.

Enjoy her.

You can actually add Travelguard to your reservation. It would cover a certain amount of medical costs, transportation, etc. should (God forbid) anything happen on board.

 

[lbgraves]

Travelguard is a great suggestion. When I shopped for travel insurance for MIL after booking the cruise for them, Travelguard was the only company that would cover MIL's cancer without it being in remission, even when I bought it a couple days after booking the cruise.

 

[Four Bears]

Another thing to discuss with Nana, is what happens if she should pass before the cruise?

My grandfather wanted his whole family to vacation together. A cruise was chosen for the versatility that it would offer the 17 of us, ranging in age from 16 - 87. We booked it several months in advance, and arranged for time off work/school.

The Wednesday before the cruise, my grandfather had a massive and fatal heart attack. The funeral was on Friday (in my religion, funerals are held very soon after death), and on Sunday the remaining 16 of us embarked on the cruise (Celebrity). It was the best decision for us; we made sure we had family-together times to reflect on him and his life, and the grandchildren were really able to bond. I know, deep in my heart, that we were honoring his desire for us to attend that cruise and if fact he would have been mad at us if we didn't go.

You are a wonderful person for doing this for her, and my guess is that Nana will rally and have a wonderful vacation. Good luck to you and your family.

 

[goofymama]

I have not read all of the responses, but honestly, if I were you, I would call DCL and tell them your story and see if they would accommodate you moving to an earlier cruise. Since the ships are not sold out, they may allow it since they have a better shot of booking someone to take your spot 30 days out than they have a booking someone a week or two out.


I say this because medicine is not an exact science and you just never know when someone will take a turn for the worst. I'd hate for you all to miss this trip. My mom was diagnosed with colon cancer 16.5 years ago. She died 3 months to the day later .... Which was 6 weeks before my wedding. We thought she had more time. If we had any idea she could go that fast, we would have moved our date up.

I really hope that is not the case with your Grandma. But if you all can possibly move up your cruise, you should try.

God speed to your grandma and your family.

Laura

 

[magrudersmakes3]

I am so sorry and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

I would recommend continue with the planning and take the trip if you can and enjoy every minute of it. I was extremely close with my nanny. We lost her last week and I have so many wonderful memories of visits and vacations together. I cannot tell you how much I am cherishing all of those memories at this moment.

 

[scoob2011]

I too am sorry for you and your family during this time. I say go for the cruise and make the memories.
Take the camera, the beach towels, the Oxycodone and enjoy!

BTW- here is what I found about travel and blood clots:

http://www.stoptheclot.org/documents/Passport%20to%20Safety%20flyer.pdf

Also consider that Cancer of any type generally makes one more likey to develop blood clots so follow the above advice.