Hi all,
I'm a regular on these boards, but am using a different name for this thread.
This afternoon, I found that my wife has been having an online affair with someone for the past few weeks. He doesn't live anywhere near us, but I found that they have said to each other that if they didn't live so far apart... well, you can guess. I confronted my wife after reading through their chats, which were not pleasant to read; they were fairly graphic. As I expected, her immediate reaction was to try and downplay it and point the finger at me. I went for a drive, despite her tearful insistence that I stay and talk. I returned home and told her I didn't want to talk about it. She surprised me in giving an emotional apology, telling me several times that she was glad she got caught. Despite her apparent sincerity, I have no interest in making her feel any less guilty about it at the moment. I told her I would talk to her tomorrow.
I fully expect that we'll move beyond the infidelity before too long. We have very young children, and I'm not interested in leaving her. I don't feel as hurt or angry as I thought I'd be, and I believe her when she says she's glad she got caught and that she made a huge mistake. I would not be so willing to move forward if it had been a physical affair. I'm ashamed to say it, but I myself have been unfaithful to someone before (although not her), so I know what it's like to be on the other side of the fence.
When I first confronted her, she reminded me that she has told me several times in the last month that she wants more affection from me, which is understandable. We've a relatively young couple, but my attraction to her has waned somewhat, which is partially due to familiarity I guess, but only partially. She has gained quite a bit of weight, and has made no effort to change that. (I'm not against people who are overweight, I'm just being honest about the reason for being less attracted to her.) I would never tell her that, because it would hurt her and she would never forget it. So I don't know what to say to her or do about it. It's not like I can just choose to be more attracted to her. Marriage counseling isn't really possible right now; we're just making enough money to survive pretty much.
This guy is married and has a young daughter, and I've thought about phoning his wife to let her know, but I've decided against it for now. But I figure, if I was in her place, I would 100% want to know.
Anyways, this message kind of ends in the middle of nowhere, but I welcome any comments or suggestions. Thanks for reading.
I'm a regular on these boards, but am using a different name for this thread.
This afternoon, I found that my wife has been having an online affair with someone for the past few weeks. He doesn't live anywhere near us, but I found that they have said to each other that if they didn't live so far apart... well, you can guess. I confronted my wife after reading through their chats, which were not pleasant to read; they were fairly graphic. As I expected, her immediate reaction was to try and downplay it and point the finger at me. I went for a drive, despite her tearful insistence that I stay and talk. I returned home and told her I didn't want to talk about it. She surprised me in giving an emotional apology, telling me several times that she was glad she got caught. Despite her apparent sincerity, I have no interest in making her feel any less guilty about it at the moment. I told her I would talk to her tomorrow.
I fully expect that we'll move beyond the infidelity before too long. We have very young children, and I'm not interested in leaving her. I don't feel as hurt or angry as I thought I'd be, and I believe her when she says she's glad she got caught and that she made a huge mistake. I would not be so willing to move forward if it had been a physical affair. I'm ashamed to say it, but I myself have been unfaithful to someone before (although not her), so I know what it's like to be on the other side of the fence.
When I first confronted her, she reminded me that she has told me several times in the last month that she wants more affection from me, which is understandable. We've a relatively young couple, but my attraction to her has waned somewhat, which is partially due to familiarity I guess, but only partially. She has gained quite a bit of weight, and has made no effort to change that. (I'm not against people who are overweight, I'm just being honest about the reason for being less attracted to her.) I would never tell her that, because it would hurt her and she would never forget it. So I don't know what to say to her or do about it. It's not like I can just choose to be more attracted to her. Marriage counseling isn't really possible right now; we're just making enough money to survive pretty much.
This guy is married and has a young daughter, and I've thought about phoning his wife to let her know, but I've decided against it for now. But I figure, if I was in her place, I would 100% want to know.
Anyways, this message kind of ends in the middle of nowhere, but I welcome any comments or suggestions. Thanks for reading.