Partner doesn’t like Disney?

Discussion in 'Gay and Lesbian at Disney' started by Pdollar88, May 1, 2018.

  1. Jason_V

    Jason_V Mouseketeer

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    Ya know, intrinsically, I am completely there with you. I had my first experience last night. A friend came over for dinner and we watched the first half of Newsies. He's a musical theater guy with a great voice. The first thing he asks is can we talk/sing through the movie? And I told him sure, why not. We've both seen the movie at least once.

    So we sang to almost every song and had a great time. Compare that to my BF who doesn't do these kinds of things.

    It just hit me like a ton of bricks last night. :)
     
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  2. coolingjupiter

    coolingjupiter Mouseketeer

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    So I've been with my husband for almost 17 years and although I loved Disney growing up, I had never really been to the parks with the exception of one trip as a family back in middle school. He had a conference a few years back and I brought my good friend with me so that while he was at the conference, we could go to the parks. We had the most amazing time and I've been hooked ever since. He, on the other hand, does not share my passion. It's not that he doesn't like it, there are things about it that he does like, but he has not become a fanatic as I apparently have! Since then, I went on a trip with just my friend again and we went with my sister and her family last spring. He had a fun time on the family trip, but he's not dying to go back. However, he made the mistake of saying he wants to go to Food & Wine, so I of course booked a trip for September with both him and my friend. He doesn't want to keep going back each year afterward, preferring to travel the world, which I want to do as well...BUT he wants to go to California next year and Paris the year after...and he brought up that there is a Disney in both locations and he thinks we should go. So, in the end, he's not a huge fan, but he knows how much I love it and takes that into consideration. My only problem is that, although I love him more than anything in this world, my friend is a kindred Disney fanatic and when we go to the park with him, HE becomes a bit of a third wheel...especially when we're pushing to go from rope drop to park close and he needs a nap! :crazy:
     
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  4. Eunice D Scott

    Eunice D Scott MyHappyThought3

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    My wife hates Disney. And Disney is just a part of who my kids and I are. It is hard because I would go every year if I could. But this year the kids and I are going by ourselves and she is ok with it. She knows we enjoy it and doesn't want to stop us. Just like she has things she enjoys that I don't. But in the end we still love each other.
    But it still makes it hard when I have Disney cravings.
     
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  5. Cubbiecakes

    Cubbiecakes Mr. Cakes

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    For me, it would be a deal-breaker for a partner not to at least somewhat enjoy Disneyland/WDW.

    My husband and I both grew up going to Disneyland several times a year, so the parks are a part of our blood. Disney itself, per se, not so much (because, let's face it, if you grew up in the 70's and early 80's, Disney's movies were absolute junk), but definitely the park(s). (now that we travel to WDW, it gets a pass... DL itself is teetering on thin ice because of the AA problem)

    And thankfully we have the same opinion about characters in the parks... because that's a deal-breaker, too.
     
  6. VandVsmama

    VandVsmama DIS Veteran

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    I'm not LGBTQ, but I have this same challenge with my spouse so I completely relate to what you're going through. We've been on 5 or 6 Disney trips now...all but the most recent one (to WDW! YAY!) being to Disneyland because it's much closer to us since we live in Arizona. My husband gets Theme Park Fatigue. The kids get it, too. And DH gets Disney Fatigue if I talk about it too much around him.

    In terms of finding others to talk about Disney stuff with, that is a primary reason why I'm here on DIS Boards. By chance, I've discovered that a couple of my coworkers are big Disney fans, so we all now live vicariously through each other whenever any of us goes on a Disney trip.

    I have a number of things that I do when we go on a Disney vacation in order to minimize DH's Theme Park Fatigue. TPF is a very real condition in our family and symptoms include grumpiness, refusal to leave the room, and sour faces. :rotfl2:Here's what I do on Disneyland trips:
    1. we stay within walking distance at a hotel on Harbor Blvd.
    2. we go to the parks for rope drop. And leave just after lunch.
    3. I use the Disneyland app to go on rides with short wait times.
    4. I pay the extra $10/day per person to use Max Pass, which allows you to get a FP in either park regardless of where you are physically. This means that you don't need a FP runner. We've used this twice now and it is,hands down, so great.
    5. we take a break at the hotel whether or not we feel that we need it.
    6. we head back around 4:30-5 pm and leave when we feel like it.
    7. In prior years, I used a subscription to Ride Max to figure out what rides to go on in what order in order to keep wait times to 20 min or less per ride. For my DH, the #1 thing that contributes to his TPF is waiting in long lines.
    8. I have everyone in my family pick THE #1 thing they want to do on the trip in the parks and we do that preferably the first day.
    9. For a non-Disney fan like my DH, I also try to include stuff that I KNOW that he would like. So, for example ,he loves Star Wars. Earlier this month at WDW, we all did The Void VR experience in Disney Springs. Expensive, but so awesome and so much fun.
    10. 2 days in a row at theme parks then a rest day. When we do 3 days in a row then a rest day, day 3 is usually rough.
    If your partner is a foodie, then pick a couple of nice restaurants that you know your partner would like and make an ADR. WDW has a bunch of places like this. Or you could go somewhere else in Orlando since there are lots of restaurants in that city. Out in Anaheim, a food lover should try Napa Rose at the GCH.

    You can also split the vacation up to include other non-Disney things that you know that your partner might be interested in. Or do an Adventures by Disney trip instead. Or a Disney cruise. If you're doing an Orlando-based Disney trip, see if you can afford to stay in some place cool like the Animal Kingdom Lodge. That place is amazing and it doesn't even feel like you're in the United States, let alone Disney World.

    My DH wants our next family trip to be non-Disney. I must admit, that I'm a little bummed about that, but I appreciate that he's at least willing to compromise and have us alternate between Disney trips and non-Disney trips.

    If you know what the specific things are about Disney trips that your partner doesn't care that much for, that might help you plan for that a little better in order to accommodate it.
     
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  7. VandVsmama

    VandVsmama DIS Veteran

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    If you haven't ever been to Gay Days at Disneyland (it's usually in early October every year), then you should TOTALLY consider doing it. Here's their website --> https://www.gaydaysanaheim.com/.

    Gay Days Anaheim often has an expo thing at the Disneyland Hotel or GCH. There are social events for the whole 4-5 days or so of Gay Days...social things off site where you can connect up and do fun stuff with other Gay Days attendees. There are often very good rates on the GCH and DLH for it. We went a couple of years ago with my old boss and his husband. It was great.

    You could combine a Disneyland trip with other fun stuff in southern California because, well, there is a LOT to do in So Cal...things that do not involve theme parks OR Disney.
     
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  8. Pdollar88

    Pdollar88 DIS Veteran

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    Great advice! Thank you for your response. I appreciate everyone’s support and the DIS community - it is helpful to chat on here.
     
  9. MickeyDee

    MickeyDee Mouseketeer

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    I don’t have any helpful advice, unfortunately, but this just reminds me that though I’ve been single for eleventy million years this time, one of my top five requirements for my forever love is they have to be at least as obsessed with Disney travel as I am.
     
  10. sarahatthesea

    sarahatthesea Earning My Ears

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    There's a lot of great advice here! My wife fortunately caught the Disney bug from me, but we've definitely had some rough spots over planning/enjoying/compromising about vacations in general. I think one of the things that helped us was figuring out what kinds of things we like to do together (at home or away), and making sure to incorporate those into any vacations, as well as what we just really hate, and making sure to plan around that, whatever the destination. For example, we love eating out but she hates choosing restaurants, so I make ADRs at WDW but also reservations way ahead of time if we go to another city or something--I hate being uncomfortable and not being able to do anything about it, so we stay on property at WDW for quick clothing changes/naps/etc and do "hotel" nature vacations, rather than camping or cabin escapes. I guess, maybe I'd try to figure out if your partner is uninterested in Disney as a location, or if there's something about the specific experience that could be better for him :)
     
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  11. MassJester

    MassJester DIS Veteran DIS Lifetime Sponsor

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    I had a partner that doesn't like Disney.

    Had...
     
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  12. coolingjupiter

    coolingjupiter Mouseketeer

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    Sorry! Accidental post!
     
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2018
  13. Jason_V

    Jason_V Mouseketeer

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    Ditto. We still have Paris Disneyland on the schedule this year, but I'm looking forward to many trips on my own.
     
  14. old lady

    old lady DIS Veteran

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    As long as your partner doesn’t start acting indifferent to you, that shouldn’t be too much of issue.
     

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