Over-planning? Loss of excitement...

FunkyDuckToo

My DISNEY HEART belongs to DONALD!!
Joined
May 23, 2015
We are 31 days out from our vacation and I can't believe I'm going to say this out loud... ...After planning for a year our Christmas Gift for our adult children/family, I have come to find that I, sadly, really am not too excited now that the time is just about upon us. I actually feel a sense of dread. 😯 Maybe a year of planning just took it out of me? I feel like through the planning, "I've been and done" and am ready to not think of it anymore. How do I fix this feeling??? Has anyone else had this happen to them right before their trip? Help. :sad1:
 
I'm feeling the same way at this point. There are days I feel excited again but other days I would rather not even go. This is definitely going to be a one and done trip for me and would love to follow along here to see what others say.
 
Been there done that :)

I think sometimes we get ourselves worked up and stressed out thinking about how all our work will end up and that usually hits shortly before a vacation (any for me).

Take a few days to breathe and relax. Maybe watch some ride videos if you're into that, or watching/listening parks music if you're into that to get your mind off the planning mindframe and more in the excited to be there mindframe. Watching videos of PeopleMover, Tomorrowland loop, Grim Grinning Ghosts and so many more got me back into the exciting "can't wait to be there" mode when it happened to me in 2017 rather than the "should we see this show or that show" planning mode.
 


I'm glad I'm not alone in this feeling...it kind of just rushed up on me in the past week or two and honestly surprised me. I think you are right @Mackenzie Click-Mickelson ... I know I am anxious on how my plans will all work out since my two adult children's significant others have never been. I have been trying to make it EVERYTHING that I could make it for them...and now I'm freaking out. They are adults. One, has really no "Disney Love" and the other has had such a tough life and no vacations ever...I wanted to spoil her. I think I have made the idea so big in my mind and I'm afraid it won't be for them.
 
I think all of us planners have that at time. Mine is normally when there is nothing else I can do but wait. Once you get there and the first Disney things pops up for us it's the first Disney billboard and then the Disney arch all the excitement comes rushing back and we have a wonderful trip.
 
I have actually had that feeling the last 3 Summers! When we were months out it was fun looking forward to leaving and all the fun of Disney. When we got to within a week or so, I had thoughts of "in 2 short weeks" it will be over. The feeling was short lived though as once we got to within a couple days of leaving and walking out of work that last time before vacation, I felt great knowing a great vacation was here.
 


It'll change when you get there, what it will evolve into, I don't know but it will change! Usually the anxiety and doubt disappear and you get into the Disney groove and have a ball. Just remember after all the planning, you can't control other's emotional reactions, and that's not your job. I actually do the opposite of some; once my plan is done, I like to take a Disney break before the trip.

Hope you have an awesome trip!
 
We leave tomorrow. I always get an anxious feeling before leaving on a trip. For me, it's worrying about getting everything ready at work and at home in order to leave it behind for a few days.
Once I'm there, though, I relax and enjoy myself.
 
I always feel like that right before any trip. Once I get there, I have an "aha" moment where I remember why I put so much effort into getting there. I am sure you will have a great trip!
 
I'm glad I'm not alone in this feeling...it kind of just rushed up on me in the past week or two and honestly surprised me. I think you are right @Mackenzie Click-Mickelson ... I know I am anxious on how my plans will all work out since my two adult children's significant others have never been. I have been trying to make it EVERYTHING that I could make it for them...and now I'm freaking out. They are adults. One, has really no "Disney Love" and the other has had such a tough life and no vacations ever...I wanted to spoil her. I think I have made the idea so big in my mind and I'm afraid it won't be for them.
Hang in there :hug:
 
I totally know what you mean, I started planning my vacation 1 year in advance as well. In some ways I think it’s too far in advance to plan a vacation because you have too much time to over analyze and stress about things related to the trip. The first couple months I was obsessed with planning the trip. My family also got sick of hearing about Disney when the trip is a year away. It makes them less excited because they’re sick of hearing about it. Now our trip is 6 months away and I’ve started to back off and focus less on the trip. The time is passing quickly. I find that it helps to focus more on other things, on things besides the trip to Disney. Then about once a month I come back to the trip plans and review it. I’m more excited that way because I’m no longer obsessing over it. In fact, whenever I step away and revisit the plans at a later time I decide that I really don’t want to ruin this experience for my family member by over planning because it’s their first time going to Disney. So I’ve revised my plans already many times so that we can be flexible and just enjoy our time together without having a planned out schedule. I am a planner so it’s difficult but I am starting to realize the less plans the better. That it’s more important to live in the moment and just have special moments together, not to be spending time counting off a checklist of everything we did. I won’t be able to control how my family member reacts to being at Disney for the first time, but I can try to make it not as stressful on us and especially myself as the planner. I don’t want us to fight or people not enjoy the time at Disney because of a strict schedule. I’m hoping these changes I’ve made recently will prevent me from having this dread feeling right before the trip.
 
Just a few suggestions and tidbits from my own experiences
1. Make plans for “yourself”. Invite everyone to participate - accommodate requests as much as you can. (Unfortunately, you‘ll find folks want to chime in at the end. I still try to reserve but seriously people I asked you six months ago)
2. Follow your plan but be willing to let others go in their own direction. Some space is at times just what’s needed to keep the group getting along. Don’t take it personally. They’ll quickly see the value in knowing how the parks work and where things are.
You are all going to have a great time!
 
Just a few suggestions and tidbits from my own experiences
1. Make plans for “yourself”. Invite everyone to participate - accommodate requests as much as you can. (Unfortunately, you‘ll find folks want to chime in at the end. I still try to reserve but seriously people I asked you six months ago)
2. Follow your plan but be willing to let others go in their own direction. Some space is at times just what’s needed to keep the group getting along. Don’t take it personally. They’ll quickly see the value in knowing how the parks work and where things are.
You are all going to have a great time!
I think I am concerned too about the "going their own direction". I worry that as I planned this as our Family Christmas Gift...I'm hoping that we will still see them during the vacation!! I'm concerned that we won't be "together as a family" as much as I would like...which was what this trip was all meant to be. My mind knows I need to loosen up, let be and "let it go" as Elsa would say....but I can't help but worry that I won't see them (i.e. share) as much as I am hoping. I guess this is where the "you can't control everything" part comes in and I need to relax and just enjoy the moments, knowing that everyone is enjoying themselves and happy with or without mom at every turn...LOL. :laughing: Hey...at least we have our table service dinners and I've already told them I would like us to meet for our fastpass rides so that we can grab those family pics on them. Plus now that I have reread this comment I am about to make...maybe I will be the one who needs the break from them!!!! Bwahahhahaaaa *SIGH*............... okay...this thread has been very therapeutic for me!! HUGE THANKS to all who have commented. (((HUGS)))
 
I’ll tell you what I did.and.I will tell you what I saw someone else do when I was part of a group trip planned by someone else.
I scheduled a tour for myself and a few in the group who wanted to come along. For the others I explained the tour would be three hours and where we could meet up after. Even though they had plenty of time to check into what they’d like to do.....they just sat and waited for the rest of us to finish. It finally dawned on them how large a Disney Park really is and that to enjoy it you have to have a direction and at least a minimum amount of park knowledge.
On an adult trip I attended with my cousin and her family. Her sister-in-law who made all our plans (did a wonderful job) handed out printed itineraries to us each morning. It saved her from having to tell each of us, more than once, what we were doing next and when and where we were eating. We did at times separate and come back together. Having the itinerary made doing that so easy on everyone.
 
I’ll tell you what I did.and.I will tell you what I saw someone else do when I was part of a group trip planned by someone else.
I scheduled a tour for myself and a few in the group who wanted to come along. For the others I explained the tour would be three hours and where we could meet up after. Even though they had plenty of time to check into what they’d like to do.....they just sat and waited for the rest of us to finish. It finally dawned on them how large a Disney Park really is and that to enjoy it you have to have a direction and at least a minimum amount of park knowledge.
On an adult trip I attended with my cousin and her family. Her sister-in-law who made all our plans (did a wonderful job) handed out printed itineraries to us each morning. It saved her from having to tell each of us, more than once, what we were doing next and when and where we were eating. We did at times separate and come back together. Having the itinerary made doing that so easy on everyone.
I've made my kids a 50 page booklet that has everything that our vacation will offer and entail...LOLOLOL....a little overboard!! HAHA
 
As others have said, we planners feel the pressure to make the trip "perfect" for our family. But once I land in Orlando and walk outside the airport, I go up to the first palm tree I see and hug it! It is MY VACATION too after all! And then let the chips fall where they may. We always have a great time, even if we hit a few bumps in the road. The schedule is always flexible.

I promised myself that our next trip, with just me and DH, will be way more laid back, I already have 3 pages of notes, and my days planned out. Jeeeeeesh . . . .
 
I do think you can over plan for some vacations and it can lead to less anticipation and lack of excitement. Unfortunately WDW forces the planning on you with the dining reservations at 180 and FP planning at 60/30. It is what it is and it has to be done. As a planner, it’s a challenge and a joy to do it but it is stressful and overwhelming at times. Just know that your family will have the time of their lives whether they know you made it happen for them or they are clueless and just think wow what a great place WDW is.

Your comments about time together worry me. Make sure that you don’t have unrealistic expectations about time together during the trip. If you have visions of everyone staying together the whole trip - make sure the others are on board with that so there are no hurt feelings. Looks like you have a very broad range of ages on the trip. I like the idea of dinners and FP’s together and then freestyle the rest. You may find that they all follow your lead the whole trip on their own anyway.
 
I'm the lead planner in our family and I obsess, then obsess, then obsess a little more. We are not going until March, haven't been since 2013 and I'm completely overwhelmed by the changes and the potential crowds we will be dealing with but it's our daughter's 13th birthday and this what she asked for.

Mine is normally when there is nothing else I can do but wait.

This is where I am right now, there isn't much more I can do until 60 days out when I can register for FPs and really get my touring plans together. But I'll likely be using a DAS in conjunction with FPs so it's all al confusing mess for me right now since literally everything has changed since we were there last.
 
I'm the lead planner in our family and I obsess, then obsess, then obsess a little more. We are not going until March, haven't been since 2013 and I'm completely overwhelmed by the changes and the potential crowds we will be dealing with but it's our daughter's 13th birthday and this what she asked for.



This is where I am right now, there isn't much more I can do until 60 days out when I can register for FPs and really get my touring plans together. But I'll likely be using a DAS in conjunction with FPs so it's all al confusing mess for me right now since literally everything has changed since we were there last.
I find the DAS actually helps this. We have one when we travel with my son, who needs it, and it means that, while we get Fps and so forth, I know that he will be able to do the rides he wants anyway (yes, with waiting, but waiting away from the queue is not a problem for him) It means that if I can't get the requested FP, at the requested time, we can probably solve it, with a little thought. I am not going to be getting a DAS when I go this trip, as I don't need one, and I am already more anxious about FP day!
 

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