I survived

[Shugardrawers]

I know where you all are right now. I have survived 4 years now with primary peritoneal cancer, a fairly rare and usually fatal form of ovarian cancer. Each and every day I have to remind myself I'm going to live today. Not just survive, but really live. Once I gave in, took a deep breath and faced the fact that I may or may not live and that I'm ok with that, it's like my whole life changed. Let go and let god is what some people would call it.

Anyway, I just wanted to weigh in here and say I'm here. I'm suffering the same survivors guilt that many of you are and having a tough time sometimes understanding I can't always do what I used to. It's good to know we aren't alone

 

[Mackey Mouse]

Hi Shugardrawers, I am glad that you posted and am more than thrilled to read your story...

I am hoping my husband will be in your survivor group too and as he says, it is what it is....and we will do our best to fight, but it is not in our hands....The fear of the unknown is sometimes scary but no one can predict the future and what lies in store for some of us is in the future.. We have to live this life one day at a time, going for the gusto, full steam ahead, and with hope and love.

Hugs to you Shugardrawers...please know that we are so happy that you are doing well and here's to a wonderful life of happiness and magic..

 

[Shugardrawers]

I truly believe it's the fear that takes some people down. There's every reason to fight to win but no reason to be afraid of not winning. Life is a cycle that we will all begin and complete someday. None of us are getting out alive. Some are going to leave sooner than we'd like and others will suffer long past the time they really should have gone. It's out of our hands. That's why I say my letting go was the best thing I could have done. It took it something that wasn't in my control to begin with out of my hands. It actually was a relief to me.

To stop being "Cancer woman" and start being Tammy again really changed my life. I went back to being Petey's mom, the cookie queen, the Dis addict and oh yeah, I have cancer too. It's now just a part of my life, it doesn't consume my life.

For everyone battling diseases for which there is no cure, letting go of the fear is NOT giving up. It's taking back your life.

 

[safetymom]

Shugardrawers, you have a wonderful attitude. Sometimes not knowing is very hard to deal with but you did. It's wonderful that you have all these other titles now.

 

[paigevz]

Shug, thanks for sharing that. I'll bet your story will help a lot of people.