Boorish behavior

[over50visits]

Wow. Seat Saving. It's a really mixed bag. When I'm in a large group I know it is difficult to get seats together in the theater. I like to get ready early and go and save seats for everyone. it is very difficult to get the entire group ready to go at the same time. It's more convenient for everyone involved and doesn't make them feel rushed. I'm not taking any more seats if I get there early or get there later. ......

Unfortunately, Disney has to specify policies that are for most people common courtesy. I think this may sum up the "no saving seats" policy:

1 - As stated in the Navigator every day, seats may not be saved in the theater
2 - If your party can't all come early enough for the seats they want, please see rule 1
3 - If you want to send your kids early to save seats, please see rule 1
4 - If it's more convenient for one or two people to go early to save seats for the group, please see rule 1
5 - If others do it and get away with it, please see rule 1
6 - If someone sits down in empty seats you are saving, please see rule 1
7 - If rule 1 is not clear, please ask the next 10 people you see what it means
8 - If waiting for everyone to arrive in order to sit together results in "poorer" seats than if you saved them, please see rule 1

 

[CM Dad]

Since there are attempts within this thread to justify it as acceptable behavior, what if the last 10 rows on the left and right sides of each theater were reserved for seat savers? Do we think that this would cut down the instances since it seems that most seat savers want front and center rows? It also allows for less disruption when people arrive later.

Maybe not the last 10 rows. Please leave the last row(s) available for those, like my wife, with mobility issues that have a hard time going down the steps. We did discover on our last cruise that on the Magic at least, they also allow accessible seating at the front of the theater on Deck 3 by going through Keys.

 

[Chirple]

Maybe not the last 10 rows. Please leave the last row(s) available for those, like my wife, with mobility issues that have a hard time going down the steps. We did discover on our last cruise that on the Magic at least, they also allow accessible seating at the front of the theater on Deck 3 by going through Keys.

I can appreciate this as I was on our 2007 cruise recovering from a broken ankle (crutches plus boot). I purposely left the entire center section as open seating in my scenario, and I recall that the very last row I had to use consisted of folding chairs.

ETA: The point of my suggestion is to make the least overall desirable seats in the theater ones that can be saved. Maybe it needs to be the back half of the theater on the right and left sides only. Seat saving isn't going away, despite what DCL asks us politely not to do. By making it less appealing, it might help reduce the problem. People have been posting their solutions for reducing the number of saved pool seats, but I haven't seen many suggestions about theater seat saving (aside from quoting the policy).

 

[southerngirl528]

Just a question, as much of a great idea that it seems, why would people abide by it?

I thought the same thing, Disney1fan, but I still like it! We can dream, right?

 

[luvthemouse71]

Furthermore, the spray sunscreen doesn't actually all get on you AND you go through a can a lot faster than the cream. It's great in a pinch, I guess, though.

It doesn’t work for me. I used it on my last cruise. I applied it properly, and still got burned. I was reapplying when I was supposed to and it was SPF 50..I think it just wasn’t thick enough.

 

[Smittycait]

My boyfriend and I were talking about this the other day. We have a couple thoughts to this behavior happening more and more. Disney cruises are a bit more expensive than others and Disney has a reputation for excellent service and "magic". Maybe, those two factors play into people EXPECTING to be doted on and getting a free pass on behaviors. The whole "I paid for this, so I can do what I want" mentality. The other thought is that, maybe this is a once in a lifetime trip for them and they are trying to squeeze EVERYTHING in on one cruise. That was our mentality on our first cruise (notice I said first...so much for once in a lifetime ha ha ha). As we did more cruises we found that if we did relax, accepted we couldn't do everything, and rolled with the punches we enjoyed everything more. We also noticed a big difference in attitude of cruisers and staff between the 7 day and 5 day cruises. Of course these are all theories and I could be completely wrong.

 

[cyclenut]

I would say if the shared experience is really, REALLY, really important to you and everyone else that wants to share the experience, then you can ALLLLLL wait in line and share the experience from start to end. Otherwise, NO SEAT SAVING! Don't mind me, I'll be the guy that walks into the theater and finds an available empty seat. I'm really not that interested in why it's empty or who it is that supposedly may or may not be coming to claim the seat. Seriously, if you want to see a show then get your group together and see the show. If some of them get busy doing other things then fine, that's their priority not mine. It's the same people that think it's ok to be late for everything, why should I respect that?

Funny you should mention that. Here's the thing. Me trying to save a few seats for my larger group really doesn't affect anyone. They are going to sit in seats anyway. I don't go to the front few rows when doing it. I'm not putting anyone out. You, however, sitting in a seat that is being saved is just being mean for the sake of being mean. Forcing yourself upon a family or group where there really is no need to do so. I know Disney policy and I also know that there is flexibility. If the show is getting close to starting and the theater is full and my party has not arrived yet, I can understand that. But hey, for all you know, they all sat down and then went back to Preludes for some snacks or headed to the bathroom after dropping off a few of their things. How would you even know?

 

[cyclenut]

Well, the stated policy right on the navigator is not to save seats. Ive had kids run past us after we waited for a long time for the theater to open. We (family of 5) planned on sitting front row center, thats why we were waiting that long. A couple kids came form behind us running to the front of the theater and sat 10 seats apart and tried claiming they were saving seats. We just sat down.

Others showed up 20 minutes later and started scolding the kids for not saving the seats, then the loudmouth father started yelling at my family. After I told him not only is there not a no saving seat policy, he should have shown up and waited like we did. 15 minutes later the rest of the group shows, and I heard the wife telling him that you cant save seats as he was still complaining....... So much like Southwest airlines, you can try to save seats, but there is nothing you can do if someone wants to sit there.

I would never advocate for something like what those kids did. There is a big difference between what I am doing and what they did. The world is not made up of absolute right and absolute wrong. There is a whole lot of gray area in between. That kind of behavior you experienced is exactly why Disney had to have the policy. What I am doing may be on the same side of the thick line you are drawing, but it is not the same action.

1) I'm no more than a few minutes ahead of the rest of my party
2) I do NOT try to take up the front few rows
3) I take as much of the group with me as possible

Yes, I've noticed that there are a lot of people saving seats and it can be frustrating at times. When we travel as a couple and see what we think are open seats close to the front only to find out they are being saved, it's a bit of a let down. I always remember though how difficult it is for a larger group like the size of our family to all get going in the same direction at the same time and all end up sitting together and I move on. I've never had a bad seat as a result. I just considered those empty seats as actually occupied.

 

[cyclenut]

What people do affects all of society. If someone is raising a kid to think the world revolves around them and that kid does not learn how to cope with disappointment, then these are the kids that grow up to be school shooters and delinquents. The only thing that stops people from being homicidal is social expectations. You say don't judge, we are a society and all must live together and it is human nature to judge others when they do not conform to the social norms. Your telling me that you have never thought "OMG what the hell is that person doing?" I have found that the people who defend poor parenting are the ones who parent the same way and treat their kid like a special snowflake. Go work at any fast food restaurant where they employ young people. You will see how this spare the rod, spoil the child mentality has done to children.

I'm sorry, but I stand my ground here. Until you have walked in another person's shoes, you should not judge them for what you observe. Saying that a kid who was allowed to choose a very specific slice of bacon would end up being a school shooter is just sick. I am not "defending" the parent's actions. I am merely saying that others should not judge the actions of the parent so harshly, especially without knowing ANYTHING about the situation. I'm taking the time here to write this because parent shaming, such as what you are doing on this thread, is a really bad behavior. If you are so frustrated by this person and their love of the perfect strip of bacon, go around and move on with your life.

 

[TortoiseTaughtUs]

There is a big difference between what I am doing and what they did.

The difference is not as large as you’d like it to be. What you are doing is behaving as though you and your apparently sizeable party are entitled to something you are not, in defiance of clearly stated policy. It is what it is, and were we to cross paths I wouldn’t make an issue of it because life is too short, but please recognize that where you are standing is nowhere near the moral high ground.

 

[serenitynow]

Three simple words: No Seat Saving. Should be easy to follow, right?

Isn’t it strange that adults have such a hard time understanding the rule that there is no seat saving? Even a group of grade school children understand what that means, “no savesies” means “no savesies” period.

 

[Shanti]

Me trying to save a few seats for my larger group really doesn't affect anyone.

Yes, it does. That is why there is a rule against it. That is why so many people complain about it. Seat saving is a problem that affects others.

It is also against the rules. Please follow DCL's rules.

 

[Dug720]

Yes, it does. That is why there is a rule against it. That is why so many people complain about it. Seat saving is a problem that affects others.

It is also against the rules. Please follow DCL's rules.

Exactly.

And it's not like it's just one family that has someone saving seats. It's often multiple families. If every group has people saving, it is a HUGE problem.

 

[Shanti]

I'm taking the time here to write this because parent shaming, such as what you are doing on this thread, is a really bad behavior.

So you're "shaming" a PP for "shaming" someone else. That's a bit hypocritical, lol.

I disagree that calling someone out on bad behavior is necessarily shaming. Bad behavior needs to be called out, and that includes bad parenting. I have seen so much bad (not ordinary imperfect, but just plain bad) parenting during my 18 years of being a schoolteacher (and being a fellow imperfect mom), that I have no sympathy for bad parents or a desire to shield them from criticism.

Children need involved parents who set limits. Parents who don't set limits & teach manners are neglecting an important part of their job, and naturally run the risk of being called out. That isn't "shaming". It's holding them accountable.

 

[Shanti]

Someone needs to invent a lounge chair that has a built in timer meter. Basically it would work just like a parking meter but instead of inserting money, you would have to swipe your room key every 30 minutes or so to keep using the chair. If it isn't swiped, a red flag would be raised and the CM's would then gather up anything left behind, thus freeing up the seat for others. It would eliminate the saving of seats for hours where no one was really using them.

I would love that! Imo the hoarding of pool loungers is an even bigger problem than the saving of theater seats. Sometimes it's literally impossible to find a vacant one on the pool deck, not because they're in use by actual people, but because so many of them are being claimed via the presence of a towel or pair of flip flops.

A guy was rude to me during our WDW vacation in August because I dared to put my things down on a resort pool chair near him for about 30 seconds. If you've ever stayed at the Beach Club or Yacht Club, you know that all the pool chairs at Stormalong Bay in the choice shaded locations are always "taken" via the presence of token flip flops, etc., despite being unoccupied by humans for 90% of the day. After swimming, I wanted to dry myself off properly so I wouldn't drip through the lobby. My robe & flip flops had been in a locker, so I took them out, set them down on a lounger (which was, naturally, occupied by the requisite pair of flip flops but not a human being) as I dried myself off. Immediately a guy sitting a few loungers away angrily snapped, "There is someone sitting there!"

I thought, um, no, actually no one is sitting there, lol. And you couldn't have said that nicely, could you? You had to just start in being nasty towards a fellow guest.

I wasn't even sitting down on the thing, just using it as a perch for my dry robe so I could get ready to properly head inside, but naturally, the guy had to cop an attitude and act like he had paid for the chair and I was tresspassing on his property.

 

[Lilsia]

So you're "shaming" a PP for "shaming" someone else. That's a bit hypocritical, lol.

I disagree that calling someone out on bad behavior is necessarily shaming. Bad behavior needs to be called out, and that includes bad parenting. I have seen so much bad (not ordinary imperfect, but just plain bad) parenting during my 18 years of being a schoolteacher (and being a fellow imperfect mom), that I have no sympathy for bad parents or a desire to shield them from criticism.

Children need involved parents who set limits. Parents who don't set limits & teach manners are neglecting an important part of their job, and naturally run the risk of being called out. That isn't "shaming". It's holding them accountable.

That is exactly right. Social norms and expectations are what keep people in line, or used to. We, as a society, police each other's behavior. Is picking up 6 pieces of bacon and asking if that one is the "perfect" one an egregious offense? No, but it goes a pattern of behavior. You are supposed to teach kids how to function in society, that is pretty much your number 1 job as a parent. To cater to a ridiculous whim about the perfect piece of bacon is 1 thing in a long line of indulging behavior that is not sustainable in society. You have to look at the bigger picture. I would bet that the reason the parent does this is because it is just easier to give into their child's whims then to correct the behavior. Usually what is best for the child is going to be something they won't like.

 

[Billinaz]

I would never advocate for something like what those kids did. There is a big difference between what I am doing and what they did. The world is not made up of absolute right and absolute wrong. There is a whole lot of gray area in between. That kind of behavior you experienced is exactly why Disney had to have the policy. What I am doing may be on the same side of the thick line you are drawing, but it is not the same action.

1) I'm no more than a few minutes ahead of the rest of my party
2) I do NOT try to take up the front few rows
3) I take as much of the group with me as possible

Yes, I've noticed that there are a lot of people saving seats and it can be frustrating at times. When we travel as a couple and see what we think are open seats close to the front only to find out they are being saved, it's a bit of a let down. I always remember though how difficult it is for a larger group like the size of our family to all get going in the same direction at the same time and all end up sitting together and I move on. I've never had a bad seat as a result. I just considered those empty seats as actually occupied.

Why be frustrated? Just sit there. Let them try to find CM to complain to.

 

[RedSox68]

Just back from the Dream, and observed this disgusting behavior at the Cabanas buffet. A guy was going along the buffet, eating items from his plate with his fingers as he went along, and then using the same hand to use the tongs to put more food on his plate. I politely asked him to stop contaminating tongs that others use, but he just ignored me. Yet another reason to use hand sanitizer AFTER you've gotten your food - unfortunately those tongs may not be as clean as you would like them to be.

And, unfortunately, I have seen these tongs laying IN the food, too

 

[FluteTuba]

You, however, sitting in a seat that is being saved is just being mean for the sake of being mean.

Well being as how there are no such thing as saved seats, I would just be occupying an empty seat that I showed up at an appropriate time to claim. Really, your actions reflect the hope that people would prefer to let you slide. Unfortunately for you and others like you I won't. I've done it before and I find the resulting temper tantrum disturbing yet revealing as well. Hopefully you would be the exception and realize that when you are in the wrong, you don't need to make it worse by causing a ruckus. Has it occurred to you that an alternative plan would be to have everyone in your party ready to go in time to get seats together? Seriously, if I was in a large group that wanted to see a show together, I would ensure everyone that wanted to go walked in the door together, or fend for themselves if they come later.

 

[MomOTwins]

But hey, for all you know, they all sat down and then went back to Preludes for some snacks or headed to the bathroom after dropping off a few of their things. How would you even know?

Seems like you are saying that it's okay to save seats even if your family is 15-20 minutes away because other people could be tricked into thinking they are just a minute away getting popcorn or in the restroom. But really, why doesn't everyone just use the bathroom and get snacks before even entering the theater, thereby observing the "no seat saving" policy? We do. I think that's part of what makes the seat saving thing frustrating: it is annoying to come in after getting yourself ready, only to find the seats you think are open that are being saved, and then have to keep hopping around juggling snacks and drinks and looking for seats that are filling up rapidly, because the theater ALWAYS fills up fast--especially when you are cutting it close heading from main dining to the second show.