Barca33Runner's Journal: Thanks For Noticin' Me(Comments Welcome)

I want to first say that I totally respect both your honesty and your choice. But I also want to take tiny issue with this statement:

but my contributions haven't been honest or helpful to anyone for a long time.

I always found your posts to be both honest (like this one) and helpful. I appreciated that you chronicled your ups and downs with the sport. The fact that you struggled with time/willpower/enthusiasm. Yeah, you're right, there are a lot of triumphs on these boards and in these journals. They're hard-won and well-deserved. But there are also journals filled with people who started and stopped and struggled and stepped away for any number or reasons. At the end of the day, we're human, and I think it's important to read about the good and about the challenges. It makes it all more real.

So, all of that to say... you might not be feeling running now. You might not be able to make it the priority you feel it should be. But in my book, you'll always be a runner, and when and if you decide to go back to it, I hope you'll check in here.
 
I want to first say that I totally respect both your honesty and your choice. But I also want to take tiny issue with this statement:



I always found your posts to be both honest (like this one) and helpful. I appreciated that you chronicled your ups and downs with the sport. The fact that you struggled with time/willpower/enthusiasm. Yeah, you're right, there are a lot of triumphs on these boards and in these journals. They're hard-won and well-deserved. But there are also journals filled with people who started and stopped and struggled and stepped away for any number or reasons. At the end of the day, we're human, and I think it's important to read about the good and about the challenges. It makes it all more real.

So, all of that to say... you might not be feeling running now. You might not be able to make it the priority you feel it should be. But in my book, you'll always be a runner, and when and if you decide to go back to it, I hope you'll check in here.

I definitely could not have said it better than this. :grouphug:
 
I want to first say that I totally respect both your honesty and your choice. But I also want to take tiny issue with this statement:



I always found your posts to be both honest (like this one) and helpful. I appreciated that you chronicled your ups and downs with the sport. The fact that you struggled with time/willpower/enthusiasm. Yeah, you're right, there are a lot of triumphs on these boards and in these journals. They're hard-won and well-deserved. But there are also journals filled with people who started and stopped and struggled and stepped away for any number or reasons. At the end of the day, we're human, and I think it's important to read about the good and about the challenges. It makes it all more real.

So, all of that to say... you might not be feeling running now. You might not be able to make it the priority you feel it should be. But in my book, you'll always be a runner, and when and if you decide to go back to it, I hope you'll check in here.

This x1000!
 
This post is long overdue. I'm not happy to be making it, but it's appropriate for where I am right now.

I am dropping the pretense that I am in any way a runner anymore. It hasn't been the case for a long time and all the times I've tried to post it into existence have really just been pathetic attempts to convince myself to turn things around. Obviously, I haven't turned things around. In the past two years I have probably run fewer miles than most everyone here runs in a month, and that includes the mileage I've covered during Dopey. I'm not injured, I have no excuse. I'm just not a runner and to pretend I am is to devalue all of the hard work and effort being put in by everyone here who is genuinely doing their best.

I'm going to stop posting on the forums altogether for a while. I'll still lurk because I'm incredibly proud of everyone here and I love reading about all of your triumphs, but my contributions haven't been honest or helpful to anyone for a long time. I hope one day to be back, I'm not sure how things will go but I'm hoping I won't let them get any worse than I already have. Thanks to anyone who followed along here or humored me whenever I posted in the other runDisney related threads; you all are the best.
I love this forum, but the comparison trap is really easy to fall into here...I didn't post in the Running Thread for a loooong time because I felt like what I was doing wasn't enough, or that I was weaker for taking rest days when I thought I needed them...because everyone else ran more than I did and everyone else wouldn't take rest days like I did. So I totally understand what you are feeling (re: the bolded portion).

I think what you have contributed to the forum is a very honest account of some of the struggles runners face (and yes, you are a runner, even if you don't feel like one right now). There are some people that just love running 100%, will run forever, love to get out there and run every day. Not everyone is like that and I think the fact that you have been so forthcoming with your thoughts and feelings on this makes you incredibly relatable, at least to me. It's not a bad thing to take a step back and take some time off for awhile if you need it, and to try something else for a bit...really, it's smarter than just forcing yourself to do something that isn't working for you right now and isn't making you feel good about yourself. IMO.

Enjoy your time off and best of luck to you!
 


It takes a lot of guts and strength to be vocal when things aren't going perfectly or exactly how you'd planned or to a level you think others hold up for you. I've struggled with that this year. I was crushing goals left and right for a couple of years and this winter and spring have just fallen off from that level. Life happens and it's in the moments where I speak up and say "sorry guys, I haven't been running as much or as fast or my races aren't going to be PR attempts or I'm only going to run a few races this year" that cause me a lot of anxiety. Because I don't want to let people down. But everyone here is so supportive. They understand that I don't have anything to be sorry for and you don't either. You've done amazing things...you will do more amazing things. You can choose what those things are. Because doing what makes you happy = amazing things. And we will cheer for you.

I often think I need to carve out more time to update my journal than I have been because I miss the support and understanding because I am super hard on myself. But it's also ok to take the break from it when needed.

Also Thank You for being the first dis-person I ever met in person and agreeing to take a pic in an early morning 5k corral with an overeager stranger.
 
This post is long overdue. I'm not happy to be making it, but it's appropriate for where I am right now.


I am dropping the pretense that I am in any way a runner anymore. It hasn't been the case for a long time and all the times I've tried to post it into existence have really just been pathetic attempts to convince myself to turn things around. Obviously, I haven't turned things around. In the past two years I have probably run fewer miles than most everyone here runs in a month, and that includes the mileage I've covered during Dopey. I'm not injured, I have no excuse. I'm just not a runner and to pretend I am is to devalue all of the hard work and effort being put in by everyone here who is genuinely doing their best.


I'm going to stop posting on the forums altogether for a while. I'll still lurk because I'm incredibly proud of everyone here and I love reading about all of your triumphs, but my contributions haven't been honest or helpful to anyone for a long time. I hope one day to be back, I'm not sure how things will go but I'm hoping I won't let them get any worse than I already have. Thanks to anyone who followed along here or humored me whenever I posted in the other runDisney related threads; you all are the best.


I've been lurking for a while but when I saw this post, I went back to the beginning and got all caught up. I'm also very new to running so I don’t even if I am in a position to give advice to someone of your ten-year. All I know is that sometimes rough patches happen. But I think it’s important to remember that your rough patch is someone else PR! Yes - your yearly miles may equal someone else’s week, but your weekly miles typically equal my month (who are we kidding - your bad weeks are usually a couple of miles more than my month)! That doesn’t make you, me or that super human in the first example any less or more of a runner. Being a runner is all or nothing. I would say, if you are purposely running as little as a half mile a week - you are 100% a runner. Before you fully commit to quitting, just take a day or two to think back on why you started, what you love about running, what your goals are and why those are your goals.

I love your thread - you are honest and don’t sugar coat the bad. So when I read about your PRs and your Dopey experiences, I know that I can trust you because you didn't lie about the mid training plan slump. Because of you and people like you, I know that it really does feel that good and that the work is really worth it.

Anyway - I hope that helps. Sorry if it’s random since I haven’t ever actually said anything on your other posts. I know you can push though this if you want to!
 


This post is long overdue. I'm not happy to be making it, but it's appropriate for where I am right now.

I am dropping the pretense that I am in any way a runner anymore. It hasn't been the case for a long time and all the times I've tried to post it into existence have really just been pathetic attempts to convince myself to turn things around. Obviously, I haven't turned things around. In the past two years I have probably run fewer miles than most everyone here runs in a month, and that includes the mileage I've covered during Dopey. I'm not injured, I have no excuse. I'm just not a runner and to pretend I am is to devalue all of the hard work and effort being put in by everyone here who is genuinely doing their best.

I'm going to stop posting on the forums altogether for a while. I'll still lurk because I'm incredibly proud of everyone here and I love reading about all of your triumphs, but my contributions haven't been honest or helpful to anyone for a long time. I hope one day to be back, I'm not sure how things will go but I'm hoping I won't let them get any worse than I already have. Thanks to anyone who followed along here or humored me whenever I posted in the other runDisney related threads; you all are the best.
It saddens me to read this. I understand you are frustrated with your training and we all need to take a break once in a while but you are a runner!
I hope that you can re-discover that spark / motivation that got you to the finish line at 2 Disney half marathons, a marathon and 5 Dopey challenges and all the other non-Disney runs.
 
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Stepping away & reflecting is always good if you aren't feeling it. These boards are the most supportive out of all the 'groups' I partake in or lurk in, so never feel like you aren't good enough for 'us'. We're just a bunch of people with Disney & running in common & we're here to pick you up when you are down or in some threads ramble about food & nonsense. I don't post a ton in journals but reading everyone's is motivation no matter the ups & downs. I follow a lot of people on instagram as well and their struggles are just as much motivation as when they post their perfect runs.

Not a runner? Bah! You are! How many Dopey's?! FIVE! you have finished! Take the time you need and come back as your posts are just as contributable as anyone else's! Good luck!
 
I'm not sure I can add to what has already been said.

I don't post a ton in journals but reading everyone's is motivation no matter the ups & downs.
Totally agree!

It took me a long while to get this through my head, and I'm still working it out for myself, but just wanted to leave this here too:
"I often hear someone say 'I'm not a real runner.' We are all runners, some just run faster than others. I never met a fake runner." Bart Yasso~
 
Everyone has said it all so perfectly. Of course you are a runner!! And, as far as I'm concerned, once a runner - always a runner. Being a runner is far more about what happens in your head and your heart instead of on your feet. Sometimes we just have to step away from it and that's okay. Please, please don't say that you haven't or don't contribute though. That just makes me sad. Your posts have always been ones that I enjoy reading, and I love your honesty about the struggles and triumphs you've experienced. Also, you are personally responsible for at least 5 additional songs on my running playlist. So there!

Don't be a stranger. You don't need to be actively training or running to still post here. I would miss your presence too much if you completely disappear. :hug:
 
Thought I’d pop back in to thank everyone for the kind words. Turns out I can’t quit this board and all of the amazing people here. I intended to be away a little longer, but I think stubbornly sticking to a quitting plan would be just about the stupidest thing I’ve ever done (and I once cut my own hair).

At different times I’ve felt so close to the finish line and I had just reached a breaking point with myself when I realized I had regressed to the point that I was closer to being back at the start. I definitely got a little overdramatic when reacting to that realization.

I am still training for my upcoming Half in Cleveland. It may end up being my worst half marathon ever, but I’m going to give my best effort to be as ready as I can. It probably won’t be the PoT that I’m looking for and definitely won’t be the sub-2:00 that I laid out as a goal, but I’ve got to get moving back in the right direction to make those things attainable. And I have to attain those things so I can come up with new and even more exciting goals. I plan on signing up for Dopey #6 next week and my goal for the rest of the year is a new PoT race and then no more races while I gear up to go for a 6 PR at Dopey #6 challenge (5k, 10k, Half, Full, Goofy, Dopey). Fortunately for me none of my PRs are any good, so they’re readily attainable.

This will be the last post in here from me, other than perhaps some replies, until I have finished my upcoming race. I’ve got a lot of work to do for next January and a relatively short timeframe to start building back the right habits. Thanks for hanging in there with me.
 
Thought I'd post a little update:

The Bad: I had my first DNS for a race last Sunday at the Cleveland Half. I woke up with a huge sinus migraine (I forgot to take my allergy medicine with me and things snowballed badly) and decided since I was not going for a PR and a new PoT was unlikely with how I was feeling I would bite the bullet and take a DNS. If it were a Disney race or something a little more exciting I probably would have gutted it out, or at least attempted to, but I've run Cleveland before so there was no larger incentive. It bummed me out, but I'm on to bigger and better things.

The Good?: I plan on restarting the journal on a more regular basis again.

The Good: I have started a running streak of at least one mile per day and have begun the process of dialing back my food intake. I am planning a PoT race for Sept. 9th and have started my training plan. It's still baby steps and I'm not ready to make any grandiose pronouncements at this point, but I'm optimistic.
 
Thought I'd post a little update:

The Bad: I had my first DNS for a race last Sunday at the Cleveland Half. I woke up with a huge sinus migraine (I forgot to take my allergy medicine with me and things snowballed badly) and decided since I was not going for a PR and a new PoT was unlikely with how I was feeling I would bite the bullet and take a DNS. If it were a Disney race or something a little more exciting I probably would have gutted it out, or at least attempted to, but I've run Cleveland before so there was no larger incentive. It bummed me out, but I'm on to bigger and better things.

The Good?: I plan on restarting the journal on a more regular basis again.

The Good: I have started a running streak of at least one mile per day and have begun the process of dialing back my food intake. I am planning a PoT race for Sept. 9th and have started my training plan. It's still baby steps and I'm not ready to make any grandiose pronouncements at this point, but I'm optimistic.
Some days we just don't have the run in us. If you'd gone and run and been miserable the whole time, I don't think it would have helped you feel better with where you're at right now. Like you said, you're on to the next thing. That's exactly the right attitude to take.

I find streaks very motivating, so congrats on getting yours rolling again!
 
Very late to the party, but I wanted to share my thoughts on your frustrations. Namely, good for you for being willing to write them down and share them with us.

It's very easy to think that everyone on here is such a great runner when they post race recaps and/or photos of a smiling, happy, grinning ear to ear exhausted runner with their latest medal(s). But post race recaps and photos may not even reflect the times when that same runner absolutely hated running and questioned why they signed up for yet another race. My own journal is updated sporadically and usually weekly. If Monday's run was brutal, but I powered through it anyways, the weekly update written days later might only say "tough, but powered through." It may not even begin to reflect how tough it truly was and how much I really questioned my decision to sign up for yet another race.

So keep being honest. That honesty helps others know that it's okay to struggle. It's okay to even hate running when training. That honesty may well help another struggling runner see that they're not alone and that if you, a very accomplished runner, struggle with running, it's okay if they do too.

My most difficult race was easily my first. If I described it as fun, you could quite possibly accuse me of lying. I also believe that part of what made that first race was difficult was that I essentially ran and trained for it alone. Completely alone. Yes, family and friends knew I was running, but I didn't share my thoughts and fears. I feared that I would fail and people would know that I failed. And those fears snowballed in a major way on race day and contributed to how difficult that race was. All my subsequent races have been a lot more fun. And I honestly believe that's in part because I have since joined the running community. And this community in particular has taught me a lot.
 
Thought I'd post a little update:

The Bad: I had my first DNS for a race last Sunday at the Cleveland Half. I woke up with a huge sinus migraine (I forgot to take my allergy medicine with me and things snowballed badly) and decided since I was not going for a PR and a new PoT was unlikely with how I was feeling I would bite the bullet and take a DNS. If it were a Disney race or something a little more exciting I probably would have gutted it out, or at least attempted to, but I've run Cleveland before so there was no larger incentive. It bummed me out, but I'm on to bigger and better things.

The Good?: I plan on restarting the journal on a more regular basis again.

The Good: I have started a running streak of at least one mile per day and have begun the process of dialing back my food intake. I am planning a PoT race for Sept. 9th and have started my training plan. It's still baby steps and I'm not ready to make any grandiose pronouncements at this point, but I'm optimistic.

Yay!! I've missed you!

A DNS is a humbling experience, no doubt. But I'm so happy that it's brought you back to this community and that it's pushing you to attempt a streak and make plans for the future.
 

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