Attempting to make Lemonade from a funeral on my 3 year old’s Birthday

[Imagineer2Be]

Need advice... going to Florida for my husband’ grandmother’s funeral. The funeral date is my daughter’s 3rd birthday. There is a Christmas Party the next day and we decided to take her there as her present and party since the funeral has messed up all our plans (dance recital, her birthday party plans, all her presents that don’t fit on the airplane...). Being 30 weeks pregnant with our second is making me very emotional about everything...

Does anyone have any advice for ways to make this a special birthday? We won’t get to the park until around when they let us in. We hope to stay at a resort that night. What are the things not to miss with a 3 year old?

 

[Betty Rohrer]

Need advice... going to Florida for my husband’ grandmother’s funeral. The funeral date is my daughter’s 3rd birthday. There is a Christmas Party the next day and we decided to take her there as her present and party since the funeral has messed up all our plans (dance recital, her birthday party plans, all her presents that don’t fit on the airplane...). Being 30 weeks pregnant with our second is making me very emotional about everything...

Does anyone have any advice for ways to make this a special birthday? We won’t get to the park until around when they let us in. We hope to stay at a resort that night. What are the things not to miss with a 3 year old?

the one thing going for you is child's age. I would play up change in plans and having a party at WDW, the Christmas party. get her a birthday button at GS for her to wear during party. I would leave opening big presents until you return that way she doesn't open and have to leave them right away while they are new. yes I know it will be after her birthday but will have something to look forward when you get home. we have to do birthday parties on different days as one of daughters works at a hospital so we have to work around her schedule including Christmas. know it seems like a big deal but it happens all the time. sorry about the dance recital as that is the one thing that cant be rescheduled and she will miss. good luck with your second one who is on the way. it is really not as bad as it seems even with the sad time of the funeral

 

[mjkacmom]

In our family, funerals can be fun, a nice reunion. Play up the positives, lots of three year olds get a cupcake and a gift, she’s getting to see loved ones and WDW!

 

[JustCallMeMommy]

Tell her how lucky she is to get to celebrate her birthday for 3(?) whole days. Hopefully, family will dote over her at the funeral (my DD "got" to go to 2 funerals within a month of her 3rd birthday and there was lots of attention for her and her cousin who is the same age). If you get her a birthday button for the party, she'll get lots of extra attention at MK. And all the cookies and hot chocolate and other treats she wants! And she gets to stay up super late! What more could a 3 year old want?

I would make sure she has a few little presents to open, but I think the presents are going to get lost among everything else you have going on. She will get to celebrate another day at home with even more presents - how exciting for her!

 

[3gr8boys]

Enough to worry about without being 30 weeks pregnant! Keep in mind that whatever you do experience at WDW will be magical for your three year old....no need to stress over "missing" things. Perhaps just a few goals- rides or character meets that relate to her favorite stories/movies.

 

[Magpie]

At three your daughter won't have any expectations around her birthday. The trip and the funeral, and seeing all of her relatives, will be more than enough distraction, and she'll have a wonderful time the next day, wearing her birthday button at Walt Disney World. Her presents will be waiting for her when you all get home.

You really don't need to worry about this not being special enough. From your daughter's perspective, it's all special. And exciting! Go to the dance party. Meet some characters. Have some cookies and hot chocolate. See the parade and fireworks. Ride a couple rides, and purchase a small toy for her. She'll have a lot of fun!

My only real suggestion for you has to do with the funeral. Give your daughter a box of Kleenex, explain that adults sometimes cry when they're sad, and tell her that it's her job to give anyone she sees crying a Kleenex. My son was three when his grandfather died, and having a "job" during the funeral ceremony really helped to make the whole afternoon go much smoother. Instead of us getting annoyed with him for being wiggly or bored during the service, he quietly went around handing out Kleenex and getting hugs in return. I'm sure he had no idea what was really going on, but he definitely liked feeling that he could help.

 

[glassslippergirl]

I’m sorry for your loss.

If you have time during the day before the party, maybe treat her to Goofy’s Candy Co at DS. She can have a small treat like chocolate marshmallows made to her specifications. It’s a really fun, birthday-like place.

 

[North of Mouse]

We've been there also.
My Mom died suddenly 2 days before my ds's 2nd birthday. Had to travel 350 mi
Made no pretense of trying to celebrate his birthday
We waited til day after his birthday for her funeral
Trust me they won't remember
No one felt like celebrating and he didn't miss anything.
Maybe you weren't close to grandparent - your call.
As for us - no way

 

[Carlymouse]

I'm sorry to hear about your family's loss.

I am taking my daughter around her 3rd birthday. I know she will be really excited to meet characters. Is it too late to schedule a character meal? Obviously there are also opportunities to meet characters in the parks, but that depends on who she wants to meet and how long everyone wants to wait. I would agree with others that at 3 she may not have concrete expectations for a party yet, but you can always tell her that you'll have a little party at home when you return, too, so she'll actually get to celebrate twice! You could also prep her on how her big birthday gifts will be waiting for her when you get back, but maybe she can pick out a smaller gift in the parks? Or you can pick one out for her.