Akwaaaard

FYI you can limit who sees your posts/photos on social media. So unless you have “every burglar in town” on your approved friends list, the burglars cannot see your posts.

One of our "friends" (o.k. a relative) saw a picture DH posted on Facebook and knew we were in Paris. The relative and his girl friend broke in and stole several checks and a bank card and stole over $12,000. Yes, the accounts were insured, but what a hassle! We had to prove we were out of town during the fraudulent transactions, and that my signature didn't match that of the woman who stole my identity.
 
I think people are just motivated to reach out and send condolences in a timely manner when there is a death. I don't think many people would judge you for enjoying a vacation that you happened to be on at the time.
 


In your situation, I would just want to continue my vacation I earned as I wish.

Personally ....
- Only about HALF my FB friends can even see my photos (and that includes relatives). The rest only get shared public stuff (cute puppies and such) and the random benign personal photo so they think I am sharing :D. What I do and where I am is none of their business!! and not open to discussion or comments. Since you aren't close enough to them for them to be aware of situation why keep in your personal loop, I would put them on a block list and they won't see your photos from your trip.
- Getting such messages would not be welcome for me so for now I would likely change my settings to "no comments." I would hate to keep getting them while I am on vacation. Once home I would adjust it back and hope their need to post has passed, or at least I would be in a "different place" and could just hit hide when they come. I would not feel obligated to respond just like you don't have to respond to a sympathy card.
- Or you could just save all your photos like folks say and post in full on return.
 
FYI you can limit who sees your posts/photos on social media. So unless you have “every burglar in town” on your approved friends list, the burglars cannot see your posts.

I don't have FB myself, so I may not have the latest info, but I thought that even if you limit who can see your posts, you don't know who can see other people's responses to your posts, and find out that way.
 


Keep posting the pictures and enjoy your vacation!

I kind of know the feeling. I was 7 when my dad died and every Father’s Day my cousin’s text me “thinking of you” type messages. Thanks but it happened almost 20 years ago and I don’t need need a yearly reminder! I don’t have the guts to ask them to stop either..
 
I would continue to post pics of vacation. I wouldn't care about what anyone else thought of me, I mean anyone who really knows you would know the relationship you had with your brother anyway.
 
Do not feel guilty about enjoying your vacation, especially if you were estranged. As far as posting pictures, if you enjoy doing that then go ahead. If someone sends you condolences, just thank them and move on.
:thumbsup2 Great advice - this would be a very gracious response.
 
Life is for the living. I would continue on enjoying your vacation, and posting as you normally would. Anyone who would judge you either doesn't know you that well or knows and shouldn't be judging!!
 
One of our "friends" (o.k. a relative) saw a picture DH posted on Facebook and knew we were in Paris. The relative and his girl friend broke in and stole several checks and a bank card and stole over $12,000. Yes, the accounts were insured, but what a hassle! We had to prove we were out of town during the fraudulent transactions, and that my signature didn't match that of the woman who stole my identity.
That is really pathetic, a relative! Relatives like these, we DONT NEED IN OUR LIVES!:scared1::( What a hassle this probably was for you! :(
 
Enjoying my first trip to Disneyland. Having a blast. Then, I get a text telling me that my estranged brother has died. He has been dead to me for about 20 years now so I shrug and move on.

In the mean time, someone posted about it on Facebook and here I am getting sympathy messages from distant relatives.

So, do keep posting my happy vacation pictures or what?

:sad2:

Life is too short to hold grudges or whatever makes people estranged from members of their own families. I have two very sick brothers and I am so sick with worry - :sad:

Do we always agree on everything - goodness no, we're sibling adults - but we always clear the air, and remember the love our mother taught us. (all 7 of us are 65+ years old, so lots of experiences with each other).

So sorry your brother died, and to answer your question, I can't, because I could never be cold and heartless. Sorry, and forgiveness can be done even if it might be one sided.
Showing others I'm having a blast while my brother's funeral is going on----------------
JMO
 
To me, even the fact that you posted the question indicates that you know that posting vacation pics while others are offering condolences seems insensitive.

I love to see other's vacation pics but don't feel the need to post a ton myself.
 
If it were me, I would probably create an "everybody except . . ." setting and post vacation photos but exclude those extended family members who ight be hurt or confused by you doing so. would take about a minute to set up
 
I’m with you. I just always think l, when I see vacation pics, that now every burglar in town knows that person’s house is empty for a week.

Only if you're not smart enough to have your FB settings set properly. Out of my 110 FB friends I'm not worried about burglars. Doubt my aunt or childhood friend is off to rob me.
 
:sad2:

Life is too short to hold grudges or whatever makes people estranged from members of their own families. I have two very sick brothers and I am so sick with worry - :sad:

Do we always agree on everything - goodness no, we're sibling adults - but we always clear the air, and remember the love our mother taught us. (all 7 of us are 65+ years old, so lots of experiences with each other).

So sorry your brother died, and to answer your question, I can't, because I could never be cold and heartless. Sorry, and forgiveness can be done even if it might be one sided.
Showing others I'm having a blast while my brother's funeral is going on----------------
JMO
Years ago, I mean decades ago, I had a well meaning, well intentioned aunt corner me and counsel me on forgiveness and not waiting until it is too late to make things right. I kept my mouth shut out of respect for my mother and let this aunt think I was the cold hearted bad guy. My mother was a very prideful woman and out of respect, I did not air family laundry, even to family.

But, in reality, my brother really was a horrible person. He was verbally abusive to my parents, stole from them. Really cleaned them out. He took my father's pain pills, sold coin collections and jewelry, stole their car, used my other brother's identity etc. He was nasty and hateful when we did interact.

Just a couple of years ago, my mother hounded me to bail my brother out of jail. I had to drive 3 hours round trip to get a $10,000 cashier's check and then go to the court. Nary a thank you - only complaints that it took too long to get him out. And, he never thanked my mother for putting up the money.

He didn't come or call when my mother was on my death bed.

I'm sorry but just because someone shares the coincidence or having the same birth parents does not mean that there has to be a relationship. I feel no need to forgive nor hold a grudge. He was non-existent to me.

As to the distant relative who have contacted me, they didn't know him. They may have met him once when he was a child but they didn't know him. I am not Facebook friends with anyone who did know him, other than the one brother (whose identity he stole).
 
I'm sorry but just because someone shares the coincidence or having the same birth parents does not mean that there has to be a relationship. I feel no need to forgive nor hold a grudge. He was non-existent to me.

Well said. There really are some very bad people out there, and just because you are related does NOT mean you have to have them in your life. Life is too short to have rotten people surrounding you. Have a great vacation!
 
If you are fortunate enough to have family that are not monsters, thieves, abusive consider yourself fortunate. It is very easy to sit upon high and judge others. If someone has been cut out of your life, it was not done easily.

Op I would remove their commment from my timeline, cut off their ability to post to my timeline and continue enjoying your vacation.
 
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