Actually cutting your trip short because of kids misbehaving

[5 Disney Fans]

No, I make the punishment fit the individual. If my DS is misbehaving I take a ride away. For example I sit w/ him while the rest of the family rides Splash Mountain. To him that is worse then everyone having to go home And my DD knows from experience that if she brags to her little brother that she is big enough to ride things he can't then she is only allowed to ride the rides HE is tall enough for the rest of the day I don't believe in punishing a group for the actions of one individual. Generally my DS causes more problems then my DDs and it is not fair to them to loose out b/c he can't pull himself together. But it is my choice to take him to Disney so I sit out with him while he is in a "ride time out", and now we are to the point where I can threaten the penalty and he will straiten up.

 

[Parla]

And my DD knows from experience that if she brags to her little brother that she is big enough to ride things he can't then she is only allowed to ride the rides HE is tall enough for the rest of the day .

I love that. DS is still figuring out that he loses things if he purposely brags to make his little sister cry.

 

[2Kds2K9]

Luckily, we've not had to leave, but my kids know I don't give idle threats.

When DD was 4 and DS was 6, we went to Hershey Park. As I was helping DS make a decision, I turned around and DD was gone. She had decided that she wanted to go on the kiddie ride by herself. When she got off the ride, I went over and grabbed her and looked her square in the eye. I told her if she left my side for a moment again, we would pack up and leave. I told her since we drove to HP, there was nothing stopping us from leaving. My DS then walked over and said to her, "Yep, she'll do it too!"

You cannot give a threat/consequence and not carry it out. Kids will know you are bluffing and continue on.

Now, regarding melt downs. That's a whole 'nother issue. A parent needs to know when to just "cut bait" and leave.

I had an incident when DD was just 8 Months and DS was 2/12. We had been shopping for a few hours and I finally found what I needed at JC Penney. It was lunchtime and I knew I was on borrowed time with the kids. DS found a video he wanted and I said "No". That was it for him! He threw himself down on the floor and had a fit. The sales lady (and I use the term loosely) said, "You ought to just pick him up and spank him. I raised four boys and I spanked them all the time!" I just looked at her and said, "Here, please take my money and get this transaction over fast." I then picked up screaming DS and walked out of the store. Of course, as soon as we were out of there he stops. ARGH. We then got lunch and headed home for nap time. Once I was home, I called the store Manager to complain. I was so upset that she would say that to me rather than try to help me out. As I stated before, I knew that the kids were getting hungry and tired. My bad.

About three years later, I'm at JC Penney again. They were having a huge sale and I was getting all new clothes for the kids. I knew where my DD was, she was by the register looking at all the hair bands, and who do I hear yelling at her? Yep, that old lady again! I had about $200 worth of clothes in my hands and just went over, put the clothes down by the register, looked at her and said, "I'd appreciate it if you didn't speak to my children that way. Here, you can put this all back and I will never return to this store again!" (And I haven't) Oh, I did walk through once and saw she was in Furniture, where she should be anyway.

Yep, raising kids is hard, but you have to stick to your word! No matter what!

Enjoy!

Leigh

 

[C&M&C&M]

Our two and four year olds were mis-behaving on our first night at the MK. Our plan was to have dinner and then to do a couple of rides. Since it was our first night we knew that it had to end.

So no rides for everyone. We walked around taking a look at every thing, and my husband and I kept commenting that the rides looked fun but " too bad we were not behaving, maybe next time we can do some rides".

It worked, they were absolute angels for the rest of the trip.

My friends cannot believe that we did that, but I feel that it made the rest of the trip all the more enjoyable for the whole family.

 

[Trentmom]

Luckily, we've not had to leave, but my kids know I don't give idle threats.

When DD was 4 and DS was 6, we went to Hershey Park. As I was helping DS make a decision, I turned around and DD was gone. She had decided that she wanted to go on the kiddie ride by herself. When she got off the ride, I went over and grabbed her and looked her square in the eye. I told her if she left my side for a moment again, we would pack up and leave. I told her since we drove to HP, there was nothing stopping us from leaving. My DS then walked over and said to her, "Yep, she'll do it too!"

You cannot give a threat/consequence and not carry it out. Kids will know you are bluffing and continue on.

Now, regarding melt downs. That's a whole 'nother issue. A parent needs to know when to just "cut bait" and leave.

I had an incident when DD was just 8 Months and DS was 2/12. We had been shopping for a few hours and I finally found what I needed at JC Penney. It was lunchtime and I knew I was on borrowed time with the kids. DS found a video he wanted and I said "No". That was it for him! He threw himself down on the floor and had a fit. The sales lady (and I use the term loosely) said, "You ought to just pick him up and spank him. I raised four boys and I spanked them all the time!" I just looked at her and said, "Here, please take my money and get this transaction over fast." I then picked up screaming DS and walked out of the store. Of course, as soon as we were out of there he stops. ARGH. We then got lunch and headed home for nap time. Once I was home, I called the store Manager to complain. I was so upset that she would say that to me rather than try to help me out. As I stated before, I knew that the kids were getting hungry and tired. My bad.

About three years later, I'm at JC Penney again. They were having a huge sale and I was getting all new clothes for the kids. I knew where my DD was, she was by the register looking at all the hair bands, and who do I hear yelling at her? Yep, that old lady again! I had about $200 worth of clothes in my hands and just went over, put the clothes down by the register, looked at her and said, "I'd appreciate it if you didn't speak to my children that way. Here, you can put this all back and I will never return to this store again!" (And I haven't) Oh, I did walk through once and saw she was in Furniture, where she should be anyway.

Yep, raising kids is hard, but you have to stick to your word! No matter what!

Enjoy!

Leigh

OMG....I would have been panicking if my child went on a ride without even saying anything to me...she sur would have been in trouble, too!!

That is crazy about that lady in Jc Penney.....Glad you made her put back your purchases....she deserved that!!!

 

[Trentmom]

Our two and four year olds were mis-behaving on our first night at the MK. Our plan was to have dinner and then to do a couple of rides. Since it was our first night we knew that it had to end.

So no rides for everyone. We walked around taking a look at every thing, and my husband and I kept commenting that the rides looked fun but " too bad we were not behaving, maybe next time we can do some rides".

It worked, they were absolute angels for the rest of the trip.

My friends cannot believe that we did that, but I feel that it made the rest of the trip all the more enjoyable for the whole family.

What a wonderful idea!!!

Glad that it worked for you....

 

[PatsGirl]

This thread would appear to be a contest for the "meanest mother on the block" award. Just so you know, I already wear that crown

Kudos to all the parents out there who understand that the best gifts we can give our children are love and discipline. If they understand that every action is followed by a consequence (sometimes good, sometimes bad) they will be much better for it in the long run.

I won't go into the few times I've had to leave a restaurant/park/party, etc. because they are much like the other posts -- it's just nice to know that there are more of us out there, sometimes it doesn't feel or look that way, does it? I sometimes even have family members berate me for being too hard on my kids but you know what? I have well-behaved (well they are normal though and do get into trouble), respectful children. They were not born that way, I am raising them that way and sounds like you all are too!!!!

 

[DisneyAprilFool]

We have left DL in the middle of the day because DD6 was throwing huge tantrums left and right. She got to go back to the hotel and stay with Grandma and Great Grandma- we got to go back to the park. Let me tell you- I was very upset that night because I knew she would have enjoyed herself, but you have to follow through as well.

We have also left a camping trip in the middle of the trip because BOTH kids were copping attitudes- and being major brats. So we packed up and left- and told them no more trips for a year (we usually do 2-3 camping trips a year and DL once a year). We stuck with it.

At DW- it has already been told to BOTH kids- the babysitters are just a phone call away. Act up in the park- they can stay in the hotel and relax while we go back to the park. End of discussion

 

[indyeric]

This thread is pretty funny. We are about to take our two girls 4 and 5 and our baby this fall. Our 4 year old is getting to a very tempermental stage, so I'm sure I'll get into a few of the situations listed.

 

[CampbellScot]

Nope. I am a firm believer in issuing threats only if you will actually carry them out, which I doubt many (if any) parents would do in the case of cutting a trip short. I DO tell DS11 if he is rude or disrespectful that I will get an in-room babysitter and leave him in the room all day, and I would ABSOLUTELY do it. I am glad I have never had to go through with it, but I would.

Me too!! I'm not going to ruin my time, my husband's time and other sibling's time b/c one child is acting out. That child will be left in the hotel room with a babysitter and strict instructions of "ROOM ONLY", no pool, no tv, NOTHING. That is a battle I would win.

As for leaving Disney when we've already paid for it? No way. I would never allow a child's bad attitude to have that much control.

The trick is: "See, everybody else is still enjoying the vacation. The only thing misbehavior gets you is trouble for yourself." Allowing bad behavior to cut a vacation short would give that child a tremendous sense of power and behavior would only get worse.

 

[Trentmom]

Me too!! I'm not going to ruin my time, my husband's time and other sibling's time b/c one child is acting out. That child will be left in the hotel room with a babysitter and strict instructions of "ROOM ONLY", no pool, no tv, NOTHING. That is a battle I would win.

As for leaving Disney when we've already paid for it? No way. I would never allow a child's bad attitude to have that much control.

The trick is: "See, everybody else is still enjoying the vacation. The only thing misbehavior gets you is trouble for yourself." Allowing bad behavior to cut a vacation short would give that child a tremendous sense of power and behavior would only get worse.

Well Put!!!

BTW....I love your avatar!!!

 

[kandb]

It's a shame, so many parents push their "children" and then get mad or lose patience with them when they are misbehaved. Children have a hard time in the heat, staying on lines for a long period of time, being pushed when all their little bodies want to do is rest or relax, etc. Some parents are too selfish to realize that kids have special needs. Linda

 

[kribit]

Not a trip, but we have left malls, amusement parks, beaches (not often but we've done it). My husband is much better than me at enforcing threats for misbehaving. It's so hard for me not to cave, but I'm getting better. Honestly, being consistent is the only way a child learns - it's really hard though.

I can say right now that we wouldn't leave on a plane from Disney, but we certainly would leave a park and go back to the hotel if my kids needed some quiet time.

 

[tjmw2727]

It's a shame, so many parents push their "children" and then get mad or lose patience with them when they are misbehaved. Children have a hard time in the heat, staying on lines for a long period of time, being pushed when all their little bodies want to do is rest or relax, etc. Some parents are too selfish to realize that kids have special needs. Linda

Actually many of us parents on this thread have recognized that some behavior issues are the result of overheating or overtired kids and recommended pool breaks or earlier evenings and other types of breaks. This is the first thing I do - as I mentioned in my post

However I know the difference between tired cranky kids and misbehaving kids. When my kids are misbehaving I will warn them once and then follow through with an appropriate consequence if the behavior doesn't stop. I don't get mad or lose patience I simply explain what I would like them to do and will happen if they don't. You will likely never even know I have just spoken to my dd's.

TJ

 

[CampbellScot]

He was waiting in line for 45 minutes how the heck was he suppose to behave? I think you overracted, ever think he had had enough yet you still pushed him to the breaking point?

We were at our hotel pool when a dad was telling his child "your ruining my vacation that I paid alot of money for" the child was having fun in the pool and dear old dad wanted to go eat dinner, he was a complete moron. DD said "mommy that dad is being mean" I said yes your right. I know he heard us oh well.

Y'know Holly, this has been a really positive post so far with people sharing their parenting trials and the way they handled bad behavior while at Disneyworld. I'm not sure why you have to make totally unnecessary and inflammatory comments towards people. You have no idea how that child was behaving. Perhaps you should reserve your judgments for situations in which you know all the details.

 

[CampbellScot]

It's a shame, so many parents push their "children" and then get mad or lose patience with them when they are misbehaved. Children have a hard time in the heat, staying on lines for a long period of time, being pushed when all their little bodies want to do is rest or relax, etc. Some parents are too selfish to realize that kids have special needs. Linda

you are either hollyb under a different name or y'all are related. Your judgemental views seem pretty similar...if you actually read the responses to this post you would see that most of the people seem to know the difference between being overheated and just plain misbehavior. The explanation of consequences always seems to follow warnings, breaks and rehydrating.

Children test limits and boundaries all the time. Being hot and cranky is no excuse for out of control behavior. It's not selfish, it's called PARENTING. Our job is not to cater to our children's every whim. Our job is to teach kids that conditions in their lives are not always going to be ideal and resorting to tantrums and disrespect to convey their discomfort is not appropriate. Period. To allow otherwise is doing the children a disservice.

 

[5 Disney Fans]

Y'know Holly, this has been a really positive post so far with people sharing their parenting trials and the way they handled bad behavior while at Disneyworld. I'm not sure why you have to make totally unnecessary and inflammatory comments towards people. You have no idea how that child was behaving. Perhaps you should reserve your judgments for situations in which you know all the details.

Well put!!! I have no idea why she insists on posting such a rude and blanket statement when she doesn't even know any of us personally OR our children. I for one am a big believer in mid-day breaks and only do the park from opening until noon then break for a few hours and go back in the evening. I don't wait in any line over 20 minutes long and use fast pass and babyswap for just about everything. I KNOW my children and what they can handle. And to tell you the truth my kids are on their worst behavior in the comfort of their own home when they are well fed, well rested, and just plain BORED. My son is at the age where he is testing limits and I am doing my job by setting them, and consistencey is key so I don't care if we are at Disney, at the mall or in my living room... the rules are the same.

Holly I am curious... do you have any children or are you judging all parents based on the woman with the little girl in the Belle dress?

 

[Trentmom]

you are either hollyb under a different name or y'all are related. Your judgemental views seem pretty similar...if you actually read the responses to this post you would see that most of the people seem to know the difference between being overheated and just plain misbehavior. The explanation of consequences always seems to follow warnings, breaks and rehydrating.

Children test limits and boundaries all the time. Being hot and cranky is no excuse for out of control behavior. It's not selfish, it's called PARENTING. Our job is not to cater to our children's every whim. Our job is to teach kids that conditions in their lives are not always going to be ideal and resorting to tantrums and disrespect to convey their discomfort is not appropriate. Period. To allow otherwise is doing the children a disservice.

Very Well Put!!!!

 

[Anniefrances]

We have never cut our trip short, but we did have a variation on this theme. When my kids were younger (around ages 7 and 9), one of them was behaving out of control. After several warnings and chances, I said that I would hire a babysitter if the behavior didn't improve. My then 7 year old told me there was no such thing as a babysitter at WDW and continued with his defiance (hitting his brother, sassing me, even shoving me when I said "no" to things). To his surprise, the next morning a babysitter showed up at our room. I took his brother for half a day to a park, leaving him behind at the resort. Problem solved, not only for that trip, but also for future ones. Thanks to Kids Nite Out - it was an expensive (but incredibly effective) learning moment for both of my kids.

 

[Nancyg56]

Just a quick heads up, this is a really OLD thread