Man Cave / She Shack

[Kittyblue]

Do you have one or wish you did? What do you use it for?

My whole house is my space, not counting the kids, but even when I was married neither of us really had our own separate space. Maybe that was part of the problem, LOL.

 

[low-key]

if you have to name it, its stupid

 

[tvguy]

No man cave or she shack.
Now that both kids have moved out and with three bathrooms, we have his, hers and ours bathrooms, does that count?

 

[disneychrista]

I have an entire house. No need for a special room/area.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Do you have one or wish you did? What do you use it for?

Sort of. One of the "bedrooms" is the den. That's where my husband hangs out most of the time (when he's not working around the house).

I sit in the living room, so I guess that's "my" space.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

We don't have a separate space & don't want one. Tonight we discussed whether we would sit beside each other on the couch or the bed to watch games. We're currently sitting up on the bed, while I'm reading the DIS & we're watching basketball & football. We're pretty much always attached at the hip, when he's not working. Currently, that means we're apart at most 2 hours a week.

 

[CdnCarrie]

My husband tends to watch tv in the basement if he wants to watch something different from me.

 

[tvguy]

We're pretty much always attached at the hip, when he's not working. Currently, that means we're apart at most 2 hours a week.

My wife and I worked together, same shift, for two and a half years in the early 1980's. . We figure we were apart 2 or 3 hours a YEAR while we Christmas shopping for each other. My wife realized when she was going Christmas shopping for me that she hadn't drive in a year.

 

[Colleen27]

Sort of. My home office is mine but is shared with DD19 when she's home. DH has a workshop in the basement and has an old TV and a radio down there so he can watch/listen to sporting events while he works. If we're watching TV or whatever, we're mostly in the living room together but I find it hard to work or read when he's watching something so I do like having my own quiet space. Plus it keeps my sewing/crafting stuff contained and out of the public spaces.

 

[Micca]

Cave man here! Big tv and all my stuff is down here. I mostly just go upstairs for meals and housekeeping. Secret to a long marriage: Two DVRs and plenty of square footage.

 

[unrequited23]

I'm an only child and grew up with an entire upper floor to myself, except for the walk-in storage. I struggle without having a retreat to have silence, books and art supplies. My DH and 2 DC have been home since last March. I wish I had a dedicated space and have taken to hiding in the pantry on occasion.

 

[easyas123]

if you have to name it, its stupid

+1

 

[Karin1984]

I'm an only child and grew up with an entire upper floor to myself, except for the walk-in storage. I struggle without having a retreat to have silence, books and art supplies. My DH and 2 DC have been home since last March. I wish I had a dedicated space and have taken to hiding in the pantry on occasion.

Can you create a little corner somewhere, in your bedroom for example?

 

[paisleys]

I'm an only child and grew up with an entire upper floor to myself, except for the walk-in storage. I struggle without having a retreat to have silence, books and art supplies. My DH and 2 DC have been home since last March. I wish I had a dedicated space and have taken to hiding in the pantry on occasion.

We've been slowly walling our house in since last year. It's apparent my husband won't be returning to work for awhile so we walled in the upstairs loft for him (he was working from the master bedroom before...you should have seen the condition of my closet after months of running in quick to get things and tossing laundry in!). I lived alone for a decade and am a bit of a loner. I had an idea to wall in a rarely used front room. Before this, if I were on my computer I had people buzzing me constantly. I got an estimate and was surprised at how affordable it was. It's been therapeutic for me to have my own little walled in space. It's small, but I have my desk, a couch and added an old TV/DVD where I put on cooking videos etc. Take a look around and see if you have an unused space you can convert like I did. I feel it adds value to our home in the long run too.

 

[SteveH]

My wife and I do a lot together, but we also have some "space" just an office in my case. We ditched our dining room and building a tiki bar and in the other room we're building a lounge space - no TVs. Just spaces for us to relax and feel a bit of a break from the rest of the house/life. But we really don't have spaces that one of us goes to hang out for long periods, but we really enjoy each others company so that's not necessary but I do believe everyone needs a bit of "down" time too.

 

[Micca]

We ditched our dining room and building a tiki bar

This might be the best idea ever!

 

[mi*vida*loca]

We have a detached finished garage that we converted into a “we cave.” Lol. It has a bar, recliner sofa, two TVs, dart board, fridge, poker table and one corner is my SO work from home equipment. I also have my workout equipment in there and that’s where I work out.

My SO mostly uses it for football Sundays or when there’s a big basketball game on (sometimes a friend or two comes over). Last week he watched football out there while DD and I watched Soul in the living room. We also use it to entertain friends and family. My kids use it when they have friends over. Less noise in the house. Our home is a small 1200 square foot rancher. It’s hard to entertain in our small home. The garage is perfect for that extra space and it’s what really sold us on the house.

Since it’s detached it leads right to the backyard (it has a garage door and a side door) so people can hang in the garage or be by the fire pit while others play cornhole or hang out at the patio set. Best part is no mess in the house when we have gatherings.

Once DS moves out I’ve claimed his bedroom as MY room. I don’t know yet what I want to do with it. Maybe an Office/workout room that I can decorate how I want with no input from anyone.

 

[Kitty 34]

Here we have She House (minus DH's "den" ) and Man Barn.

 

[tzolkin]

We ditched our dining room and building a tiki bar and in the other room we're building a lounge space - no TVs. Just spaces for us to relax and feel a bit of a break from the rest of the house/life. But we really don't have spaces that one of us goes to hang out for long periods, but we really enjoy each others company so that's not necessary but I do believe everyone needs a bit of "down" time too.

This sounds very similar to our current and previous home. There are little spots with chairs, small couch, bar, desks, etc that people can go to "retreat" (read a book, have a drink, etc), but there are not dedicated rooms for any one person (which is what I think of with terms like "man cave/she shed"). We also have lots of outdoor space (front/side and back porches) where one person can go to lie in a hammock, listen to music, etc.

In our previous home, we converted the "formal" dining room into a very cool pub room. In our current house, we have been purchasing vintage furniture to have a tiki lounge area. We have found these rooms/spaces get way more use on a daily basis than they would have in their original state.

I'm an only child and grew up with an entire upper floor to myself, except for the walk-in storage. I struggle without having a retreat to have silence, books and art supplies. My DH and 2 DC have been home since last March. I wish I had a dedicated space and have taken to hiding in the pantry on occasion.

Is the issue that your husband and kids don't understand that you need private/quiet time? Fortunately, I have a household of introverts so everyone respects everyone else's need to retreat to recharge. We spend a lot of quality time together, but then everyone scatters to their own corners for a bit. Maybe you should have a conversation with them to explain why this is important to you and come up with some ideas on how to implement.

You should be able to find something that works for you regardless of the size of your home. Our previous two homes were over 3000sqft, but our current is less than half that size. There are still probably at least 10 spots where someone could go for "alone" time and since there are only 5 of us, that's plenty.

 

[slo]

My DH has his man cave (the basement) that he spends some time in.
It’s a rec room with a full bar - so it’s used for get togethers
He goes down there when I want to watch something on the tv that he’s not interested in and he likes building car models of which he does on his bar. It’s cooler down there in the summer, so he spends more time down there on the hot days because the temp is more comfortable.